


The Fate Of A Runt

by DiamondWings



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Fluff, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bullying, But they got reasons, Chan is Stressedt, Changbin has a hard life, Everyone sucks except Changbin at first, Hashtag PoorBin21stCentury applies, It takes a while for everyone to stop being asses, It's not easy being pack alpha, Jeongin is a pure baby, M/M, Magical Creatures, Magical School setting, Packs, Packs as family, Strangers to Lovers, Violence, Werewolves, bc of course, someone protect him, the only one I trust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-08
Updated: 2018-11-26
Packaged: 2019-07-28 03:07:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 71,983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16232942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DiamondWings/pseuds/DiamondWings
Summary: Changbin is the runt of the family, and one day his pack decides he's too worthless to keep around. He's sent away to a boarding school for magical creatures, where he meets a pack willing to take him in for the first time. Soon,  he learns that not all that shines is gold, though. But maybe things just have to get worse first before they can become truly good.





	1. Chapter 1 - A New Beginning

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ashtin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashtin/gifts).



> This is a story for my very muchly treasured friend Ashtin whom I love with my whole heart but seem incapable to finish birthday presents in time for. So this is a stand-in until I get the actual present done! Happy Birthday Ashie, I love you, even if you might doubt that upon reading this fic!  
> (Everyone who isn't Ashtin but has stumbled upon this story, you should definitely go check out her stories on this here archive, too!)

“Changbin, you’re useless.” His sister sighed, shaking her head as she passed him and went upstairs.

Changbin looked around, not quite sure what he had done, or failed to do, that made him useless now. In the end, he just shrugged, getting on with his day. It by far wasn’t the first time he’d been called useless, and it wouldn’t be the last. And that was just today.

“Changbin, did you bring the water into the pantry?” His mother called out from the kitchen.

“I’m on it!” He answered, just as his mother poked her head out into the hallway. She regarded him with a disapproving once-over.

“What are you doing?”

Changbin blinked, confused.

“Bringing the water into the pantry?” He shrugged slightly, pointing out the box of water bottles in his hands.

His mother frowned.

“I can see that. Why are you only carrying one box? Do you have nothing else to do today?”

Changbin’s shoulders drooped. He didn’t answer. His mother knew the answer to her question anyway.

“So weak. You’re useless.”

There. He knew he’d be called that again today. It didn’t even sting anymore. Ignoring it, he kept going, dropping the box of water bottles off in the pantry, before going back out to get the next one.

There were twenty-four bottles per box. Which meant each box weighed about fifteen kilos. He could carry more than fifteen kilos. But thirty kilos at once was too much, especially since the boxes came in such a stupid shape that made it really awkward to carry them. So instead of trying to carry two boxes at once, which would inevitably result in one of them falling, the bottles breaking and him being called useless and getting punished, he resorted to walking twice as often, breaking no bottles, and being called useless anyway. He just couldn’t avoid that part.

“Hey, runt! Hurry up, I got places to be!”

Changbin hid his flinch. Now that, that was something he hated being called. Even if it was pretty much the only thing his brother ever called him.

He hurried outside, hastily taking the remaining three boxes out of the car his brother wanted to leave in. As soon as he was done and shut the trunk, his brother started the car, ready to drive off. Instead, of doing that, though, he set the car back. Changbin watched it happen as if in slow motion, the car coming towards him, towards the boxes, and tipping the one he’d sat on top of another off its perch. The sound of glass breaking broke the spell, and he gasped quietly. His brother stopped the car, leaning out of the window and grinning at him.

“Ooops. Better clean that up before mum sees it, runt! You’ll get in trouble!” laughing, he drove off.

Changbin clenched his fists at his sides, but said nothing. Taking a deep breath, he picked one of the whole boxes up and went to carry it inside, followed by the other. The last one, he inspected closer still in the driveway. Thankfully, not all of the bottles were broken, just about half of them. Carefully, he picked up the shards and threw them out right there, carrying the half empty box into the pantry as well.

***

He shouldn’t have expected to get away that easily, though. Not even two hours later, his mother’s yell of his name rang through the house.

“Changbin!”

He flinched, abandoning his homework to find his mother.

“Yes?”

“Why is that new box of water half empty? Where are the other bottles?”

“The car was in reverse when hyung went to drive off and he ended up running one box over. The other bottles broke.”

His mother’s gaze darkened, and moments later a loud slap resounded through the house.

“Oh, so now it’s your brother’s fault?! That’s all you ever do, putting the blame on others! If you weren’t so pathetically weak there wouldn’t have been any boxes to run over when your brother left! I am so fed up with you… Get out of my sight!”

Changbin grit his teeth, ignoring his stinging cheek as he hurried back to his room. He sighed as he let himself fall back into his desk-chair. He’d gotten away pretty lightly this time, all things considered. He wouldn’t get to eat dinner tonight, either, since he never did when his mother sent him away like that, but that was something he was pretty used to, too. He had an emergency snack stash ready under a loose floor board under his bed for these occasions. So, all in all, he couldn’t really complain, even if his cheek still throbbed.

Later that night, long after dinner, he still made an attempt to sneak out to the bathroom. Of course, the one on the first floor was locked. His siblings didn’t share that one with him. He had to use the spare one in the basement, with the shower that only had hot water when it was in the mood for it.

As quietly as possibly, he snuck down the stairs, leaving out the steps he knew creaked, and made to sneak past the open living room door to get to the stairs that led to the basement. The discussion he could hear going on in the room made him pause, though.

“I’ve taken care of that ungrateful runt long enough now. I’m done.” That was his mother.

“What are you going to do, then? It’s not like we can just kick him out. If someone finds him he’ll be linked back to us.” His brother.

“Ugh, he’s so useless. If at least he was an omega, we could just find someone else willing to take him…”

Changbin grit his teeth at his sister’s words, but had to bite his tongue, too, at his brother’s following words.

“That runt? Even if he was an omega, we could throw him naked in a horndog’s face and they still wouldn’t take him.”

“I’m inclined to agree with you on that… No, I don’t think we’ll find anyone who’d take him in willingly if they don’t have to…” His mother mused.

“What about an institution? There are places that take in strays…” His father suggested.

“To then find where they belong and send them back; yeah, right! Ugh, I should have listened to my mother and drowned him when I had the chance!” His mother sounded defeated, but not as much as Changbin felt in that moment.

He couldn’t stand listening further, continuing his journey to the basement bathroom. He knew he was a disappointment, but it wouldn’t have occurred to him that his family would ever really try to get rid of him because of that.

He tried not to hear anything else when he came back up, but he still caught his father saying something about calling someone first thing the next morning; they still owed him a favour.

He didn’t really want to know what that meant for him. But of course, he was going to find out. Right the next morning, when he came down to go to school.

“Runt, stay!” His mother barked from the kitchen as he was about to open the door. Her alpha command made him freeze in his spot.

“You’re not going back to that school. There’s been a change of plans.”

Changbin tried to keep an impassive face as his mother came out into the hallway.

“Go back upstairs and pack your things. All of them.”

It felt as if his heart was plummeting out of his chest, landing somewhere near his ankles, but he didn’t dare ask, didn’t dare argue, and just turned around to do as told.

He didn’t have many things to begin with, so he managed to squeeze everything into two suitcases and his backpack.

“Are you done yet?” Thankfully, the shout came just as he was finishing zipping up the second suitcase.

“Yes, mother.”

“Then get down here. Quickly!”

He didn’t bother looking back at his room as he left with his things in tow, even though he was pretty sure he wouldn’t get to see it again. He didn’t really care.

Once he reached the bottom of the stairs, his mother shoved a piece of paper at him.

“We found you a new school. It’s a boarding school, somewhere down south. Your father says he knows the headmaster. They’ll take you in. Make sure you don’t miss your connections.”

Changbin stared at the already slightly rumpled piece of paper, sporting the name of a school and a bus connection.

“What are you waiting for! Out!” His mother exasperated, shoving him towards the door when he didn’t move quite fast enough.

Changbin stumbled out, catching himself and his things in the driveway to the house. It wasn’t that he would particularly miss this place, but it still stung to be sent off like that. He didn’t linger, though, starting down the street to the next bus station.

***

He breathed a sigh of relief when he eventually dropped into an empty seat on the bus that would take him south. He’d made it with a few minutes to spare, and there were still plenty of seats free in the bus. He was grateful for the small mercies life offered him as he leaned his head against the window, catching his breath after rushing through the whole terminal, and closed his eyes. Not long after, the bus departed, and he quickly fell asleep.

He woke up again when the bus stopped some time later, more people getting on board. He blinked lazily, only opening his eyes wider when someone stopped next to his row of seats.

“Hi! Is this seat free?”

Changbin sat up a little straighter.

“Uh… Yeah, sure.” He took his backpack and set it down on the floor between his feet. The stranger that had asked sat down hurriedly, the bus already pulling back into traffic.

“Oh, you’re going down to the Academy for Magical Misfits, too?” He suddenly asked, and Changbin frowned. The other laughed.

“Just kidding. It’s just what basically everyone going there calls it. You’re new, huh?”

Changbin still didn’t answer. What was the guy talking about?

As if hearing his question, the stranger pointed at the crumpled page Changbin was still holding in his lap.

“I go there, too. My name is Lim Dowoon.” He extended a hand for Changbin to shake, and Changbin did, although weirded out.

“You’re a wolf, too. You’ll need a pack to survive that school. Do you know which one you’ll choose yet?”

Changbin’s eyes widened slightly.

“N-no… I didn’t think about that…” He answered eventually.

“Well, you still have some time, I suppose. I highly recommend my own pack, though, of course. What’s your name, by the way?”

Changbin sighed.

“Seo Changbin…”

He wasn’t sure the other even heard his answer, since he immediately started talking again. About the Academy, about his pack there (that was still something that threw Changbin off. He’d have to choose a pack? Didn’t the other kids there have packs at home? How did they have packs in a school that wasn’t even exclusively for wolves, but all kinds of creatures?), about himself, about the weather, about whatever went on his mind. Even if Changbin had wanted to ask him questions, he wouldn’t have been able to fit a single word into the avalanche the other was unloading on him, giving him lots of information he didn’t care for instead.

“You know what, I like you. You are a good listener. I’ll put in a good word with my alpha in case you want to join our pack!” Dowoon announced eventually, causing Changbin to splutter. He hadn’t even done anything! Not even listen; not much, anyway.

“T-thank you?” He answered, regardless, even if it sounded more like a question.

“No biggie. So, what about you? Where are you from? Why are you being sent to our lovely Academy?”

Changbin wasn’t really comfortable answering those questions, but did so anyway.

“Seoul. Alpha decided it would be best for everyone.” He answered, purposely vague.

“Hmm. Legal way of kicking you out, huh?”

Changbin’s eyes widened against his will, confirming the other’s suspicion.

“That sucks. But, hey, you’re not alone with that. We don’t call it Academy of Misfits for nothing. Your pack kicking you out means nothing where we’re heading, pretty much everyone there has been through that, or similar. You’ll find a new pack for yourself there.”

Now that was unexpected information for Changbin.

“Really? But…”

“Think about it. A boarding school. Somewhere in the middle of nowhere. That lets students stay over all breaks including summer, doesn’t require anyone to pay anything while still attending it, no documents, no ties… It’s the perfect location to dump your unwanted pack members. Of course, that opportunity is taken by many. You’ll fit right in.”

Now that, that sounded too good to be true. Fitting in. Changbin hadn’t been able to relate to that, ever. Being the runt, his parents hadn’t bothered finding him a school where he’d fit in, instead dumping him in the first human school they’d find somewhere close by where they lived. Among humans, there’d never been a chance for him to fit in, what with the whole not-being-human-in-the-first-place. Later on, when he’d had to switch schools as he got older, there weren’t only humans surrounding him anymore, but he still hadn’t fit in anywhere. No one else was a runt, everyone had family, relatives, friends, connections to fit in. Except him.

If it truly proved to be true that he’d fit in, he would be willing to even thank his mother for sending him down to that Academy.

He was slightly more animated after that disclosure, making an effort to converse with Dowoon the rest of the trip, until they finally arrived at their destination.

“Come, let me help you with your suitcases. I only have my backpack, anyway.” Dowoon offered when Changbin started to struggle with his things after getting off the bus.

“You’ll have to check in with the Headmaster first, I suppose, since you’re new, and your alpha probably contacted him to get you in here. I’ll show you where to go.”

Changbin only stammered a thanks, letting the other take the handle of one of his suitcases and show him the way. He was pretty sure he would have gotten lost on his own in the seemingly endless hallways once they entered the main building. Dowoon navigated them expertly, though, and eventually they arrived at their destination. Dowoon even knocked for him, introducing him when they were called in.

“I’ll wait here!” He announced when Changbin stepped inside the office. Changbin wanted to tell him it was ok, not to bother, but he didn’t get the chance.

The meeting with the Headmaster wasn’t noteworthy. He basically only got told not to get in trouble, and that was it. The secretary handed him a schedule and room key, and then he was free to go again.

As promised, Dowoon had waited for him.

“So, which room did you get?” He asked first thing once Changbin stepped out of the office. Changbin looked cluelessly at the key he was holding.

“115D?”

Dowoon’s face lit up.

“I know where that is! A friend of mine is in 115A, you’ll be roommates!”

Changbin’s eyes widened at that, and once again he found himself hurrying after Dowoon as the other showed the way.

“This is it!” He eventually stopped in front of a door, banging against it. Changbin cringed, having preferred to just use his key to get in. The door opened an instant later, someone with an annoyed expression peeking out.

“Geumhyuk! Hey, you got a new roommate, in D. This is Changbin. Changbin, this is Geumhyuk, the friend I told you about.”

Geumhyuk rose an eyebrow, grumbling.

“As if I would ever be friends with your loud ass…” 

Dowoon laughed, unfazed, and slung an arm around the other’s shoulders, pushing him into the short hallway behind the door again.

“Aww, you hurt me! I thought you loved me!”

The other grumbled again, shaking Dowoon off and shoving him against a wall, continuing further into the apartment-like dorm. Dowoon remained unfazed and turned back to Changbin, who was still standing outside the door.

“Come on in, I’ll introduce you to the others and you can put your stuff away.”

He didn’t really have a choice, so Changbin eventually followed him in. His room turned out to be right next to the door. His other dorm-mates seemed to be quite alright, too, when Dowoon wasn’t annoying them. Only Geumhyuk was a wolf, too, the other two being warlocks, and not members of the same pack as Dowoon and Geumhyuk. Still, they all seemed to be friends, bantering playfully with each other, and Changbin relaxed slowly around them, even if he didn’t understand half of their jokes. Dowoon reassured him it wouldn’t take him long before he did, though, so he shouldn’t worry about it.

At some point, one of the warlocks left, just to come back soon after carrying dinner for all of them. Changbin was really grateful, accepting what the other had brought for him, but excused himself not long after to get properly settled in in his room. He was pretty damn tired after the day-long journey, too, and even though they were friendly and funny enough, the roommates were also loud and tiring him out even more.

***

All in all, this school didn’t seem to be all that different from any other school, at least subject-wise, Changbin concluded after his first day of classes. They were even at about the same topics in the different subjects that he’d been in his old school, making it easy for him to follow, and finish his homework in a reasonable time.

For some reason he wasn’t sure about, it seemed as if Dowoon practically lived in their dorm, too, he figured once he left his room to find something to eat.

“Are you hungry? Daeve is out getting food from the cafeteria for everyone!” Dowoon announced as Changbin was about to leave the dorm. Changbin turned back to join the other in the common area at that. If the warlock was getting them food anyway, there was no point in him making the trip down to the cafeteria himself.

“Fuck, if I fail this homework too, I’ll have to retake the class. Stupid bitch ass math, who even needs that!” Geumhyuk exclaimed in that moment, throwing his textbook across the room. It narrowly missed Changbin, instead landing in a crumpled heap in the hallway.

“I’d let you copy mine, but you know I suck at math, too…” Dowoon shrugged, unperturbed.

“That’s because you have even less of a brain than I do. What about you, Changbin? How’s your math?” Geumhyuk turned to Changbin.

“Pretty reasonable…” He admitted, shyly.

Both the other’s heads turned towards him.

“Really? Have you done the homework yet?”

Changbin nodded, and Dowoon sat up quickly.

“Let us copy! We’re both gonna fail at this rate. Be our saving grace!”

Changbin bit his lip. He didn’t want to let them copy, not really. He wasn’t a hundred percent sure his answers were all correct, and it would be pretty obvious if those two turned out to be really good all of a sudden, but had the exact same mistakes as him…

“Come on, Changbin. We’ll change our answers just a bit, so it isn’t obvious, no one will notice.” Dowoon coerced, and Changbin sighed. Well… It was clear neither of them cared for math and would want to pursue something involving it at any point, so what was the harm if he let them copy his answers just so they didn’t fail? He nodded eventually, walking back to his room to get his book to lend the others. He just so happened to hand the others his book as the warlock returned, announcing food for everyone. And asking loudly what was going on. Dowoon filled him in, and before long, all four other boys were copying Changbin’s homework.

It would be ok, he tried to reassure himself, to stomp down the uneasy feeling in his gut. It’s not that big of a deal.

“You are a life saver, Changbinnie!” Dowoon crooned eventually, latching himself onto Changbin and squeezing him so hard he feared his ribs might crack.

“Hey, dickhead, let him live!” Geumhyuk intervened, smacking Dowoon on top of his head with Changbin’s textbook before handing it back to Changbin.

Dowoon made a comical expression, before finding his smile again.

“I feel like Changbin deserves some kind of reward. Daeve, what did you bring from the cafeteria? Let’s give Changbin the nicest bits!”

Changbin wanted to protest, but he wasn’t even heard as the warlock piled food onto his plate.

“Don’t worry about it and just enjoy it, Changbin. Daeve can always go back downstairs to get more if it’s not enough for everyone.”

Everyone laughed, including Daeve, and Changbin felt a little more at ease. Well, at least one good thing had come out of letting them copy his homework.

***

The next good thing happened the next morning, as Dowoon and Geumhyuk dragged him down to the cafeteria with them. Well, he assumed it was a good thing. He was introduced to their pack. It was a fairly large pack, he found, and loud. But if it had people like Dowoon in it, of course it would be loud. They were rowdy, too, but then again he wasn’t that surprised, either, seeing how Dowoon and Geumhyuk interacted most of the time.

They were almost done with breakfast when the pack alpha eventually approached him.

“So, you are the new kid, huh?”

Changbin turned around, having to crane his neck to see the face of the bulky alpha standing behind his seat. He nodded, bowing slightly as he answered.

“Y-yes. I’m Seo Changbin.”

The alpha hummed.

“No pack?”

Changbin shook his head.

The alpha shook his head, tsking.

“Wrong answer. You’re ours now.”

Cheers erupted around him, and Changbin flinched. Just like that? Just like that he became a member of their pack? An elbow to his side made him snap out of his thoughts.

“Say thank you!” Dowoon hissed next to him.

Changbin bowed again, stammering out a thank-you, and the alpha nodded, pleased, before leaving again. Changbin turned back to his food, dazed, but he didn’t feel like eating anymore. He had a pack again. Just like that. A pack that seemed to want to have him as part of it. Truly, it was a foreign concept, but… but he wasn’t opposed to it. Not at all.


	2. Chapter 2 - Rock Bottom

Chapter 2

Sometimes, Changbin had to remind himself that he should be grateful for having a pack again. When the other members were loud and playfighting roughly until someone got hurt and had to be taken to the nurse, for example. When he had to lie to a teacher and say that no, he hadn’t let anyone copy his homework. When he had a headache but was dragged to hang out with the rest of the pack until late at night.

Or when someone who’d been brawling with someone else suddenly stumbled back and hit him in the head with an elbow; hard. To the point he saw stars from it.

To his surprise, Geumhyuk, who’d been sitting right next to him, jumped up and shoved the offender away.

“Hey, watch it! Knock him in the head again and you’re getting in trouble with me!”

Changbin wasn’t only mildly surprised by that. This might as well be the first time someone stood up for him in his life, and he couldn’t help but feel really grateful, warmth and a sense of belonging spreading in his chest.

“Yeah, dude. All our math grades depend on his head, don’t go around fucking us all over!” Someone else shouted, and the room erupted in laughter. Changbin laughed with them, but the sense of warmth had dulled at that comment. It was ok, though, he told himself. In a pack, everyone had to contribute in some way, right? And if this was his way, so be it. At least he had a pack to contribute to. He’d just have to learn to deal with it, and it wasn’t like his whole life was consumed by it.

Still, he got a feeling that most of his life must be consumed by pack activities nowadays, when he first saw _him._ If he hadn’t been terribly occupied with his pack, there was no way he would have missed _him._

The first time he saw him, he was in his wolf form. And damn, was it a majestic form! He was huge, almost purely white, and exuded strength and power. He was most certainly gaping at him, until Dowoon came up to him and elbowed him.

“Dude, you better make sure no one else sees you ogling _that_!”

Changbin blinked.

“What?”

Dowoon nodded at the white wolf, who was swiftly turning back into his human form as someone approached him.

“That dude. He’s bad news.”

Changbin felt his heart drop.

“Oh?”

Dowoon nodded.

“He’s one of _them_ , that all high and mighty pack I told you about the other day? Think they are all that and more, acting all exclusive and superior. He’s one of the worst, alpha’s right hand, blah blah. You don’t want to mess with that. He’d step on you without second thought if he ever got the chance, they don’t have any sympathy for the likes of us.”

Changbin grimaced. He knew his fair share of people like that. It would figure that the most beautiful wolf he’d ever laid eyes upon would be one of them. That was just his luck.

Then again, being who he was, he never stood a chance to attract the attention of someone as splendid as the white one, anyway, not even in a bad way, much less in a good way.

“That sucks.” He answered Dowoon, who hummed and started talking about something else.

Changbin forced his thoughts to focus on Dowoon’s chatter, but it was hard. His mind kept wandering back to the big white wolf.

Felix, he learned by accident a few days later, was the name of the white wolf. Not that it mattered. It also didn’t matter that he found out that the wolf had a laugh that seemed to set his lungs on fire, or that his deep, rumbling voice managed to turn his knees into jelly from the other end of the cafeteria and over the loud chatter of his pack mates. Absolutely irrelevant.

True to what he’d been told to expect, the white wolf, who happened to be blond in human form and absolutely no less stunning than in his wolf form, never once even glanced his way. Ever. Changbin would know, yes, because he most definitely kept an eye on the other. Accidentally, of course. But still carefully enough so neither Dowoon nor anyone else would notice again.

***

In hindsight, a few days later, Changbin wished it had stayed that way. It would have been better if Felix had never looked at him. It would have been better if a lot of things hadn’t happened, but they had happened.

One evening, or rather late afternoon -but that was irrelevant, really- Geumhyuk had burst into the dorm, barely greeting Changbin before grabbing Changbin’s writ excitedly and dragging him with him.

“Dude, you gotta see this. Hurry up!”

Changbin stumbled after him, confused.

“Wha-what happened?”

“You’ll see! Damn, we’ve been waiting for a moment like this for so long, you’re so lucky to get to live this moment so soon after joining! This is gonna be epic!”

Changbin had no idea what the other was talking about, too busy trying not to stumble as the other dragged him with him, out of the residential wings and into the lecturing wings of the complex, before bursting into an empty classroom. Or, well, it should have been empty, but it wasn’t. The whole pack seemed to be there, jeering and hooting, yelling insults and profanities.

He should have listened to his gut feeling that told him this was Not Good as soon as he caught awareness of his surroundings and left, but he didn’t get the chance. Dowoon noticed their arrival, quickly taking over dragging Changbin with him through the other pack members and further to the front, until he caught sight of two figures who most definitely weren’t part of the pack, standing close together and to the wall opposite the door, trying to maintain as much distance from their pack as possible.

“Some of ours managed to find these two alone out here and got them cornered. They are from the Pack of Pretentious Pricks. We’ve been waiting for so long to teach them a lesson!” Dowoon explained, and Changbin felt sick to his stomach. Looking closer at the two, he noticed the taller one already had a split lip, and the other a cut over his nose, clutching a broken pair of glasses in one hand at his side. Both looked ready to fight to defend themselves, but they wouldn’t stand a chance against this whole pack.

The noise level rose when one from the pack moved forward, theatrically throwing his jacket back at his companions, loosening his shoulders as he approached the two. He was easily broader and heavier and the two others combined, a mountain of beefy muscle, but still the taller of the two moved in front of his companion, getting ready to defend the other. Changbin wanted to look away, horrified by the events about to unfold, but he couldn’t.

The muscle-mountain reached out, shoving at the other and making him stumble back against the other.

“Move, it’s not you I want to play with!” He grunted, but the other caught himself and lunged forward, teeth elongating as he snapped at the big dude’s arm. He managed to catch some flesh between his teeth, but it did him no good, the larger one grabbing him by his neck and throwing him to the floor as if he was no more than a ragdoll.

“Now we’re talking! Aren’t you a pretty little thing? It pisses me off, to be honest. You look too good. I’ve always wanted to change that!” Before he finished speaking, the nails on his hand had turned into talons, and he lunged to drag them over the smaller’s face.

Changbin flinched, closing his eyes, but loud booing from his pack made him open them again. The smaller had ducked the lunge, unbalancing the other, which managed to turn him into a very pissed beef-mountain. Still, the smaller kept ducking, bending, jumping, and thus evading the punches and lunges thrown at him, even if he didn’t manage to get in any of his own. Eventually, he bumped into his taller companion, though, who’d gotten up in the meantime, causing them both to tumble to the floor.

The pack cheered, and for the first time, real fear flashed in the eyes of the duo as the giant wolf approached them again.

“Enough of the games. It’s time for business.” He growled, clenching and unclenching his hands that were both resembling claws more than hands.

Another growl sounded, this one deeper, and a hell of a lot more threatening. Changbin was shoved around, stumbled and fell as the mass of his pack moved aside, leaving him on the floor and suddenly alone in his spot.

“You’re taking the words out of my mouth.” A calm voice enunciated, and a large sand-coloured wolf strutted down the hastily cleared opening between the pack members.

Changbin’s heart stopped for several beats when he recognized the wolf following the sand-coloured one. It was the white one. He paid none of the pack members any attention, instead darting right past them and towards the other end of the room, snapping sharp teeth at the muscle-mountain and causing him to hastily stumble back a couple of steps, opening the way to the two members of the other pack that were cowering on the ground. The white one nosed them gently, helping them up with the help of another wolf, light brown and slightly smaller that kind of reminded Changbin of a bear.

“This is a one-time thing.” The calm voice returned, and Changbin realized it was that of the big sand coloured wolf, addressing his whole pack with narrowed eyes. “I suggest you go back to bashing each other’s heads in and stay away from my pack from now on, or you won’t like the consequences. I can promise you that much.”

Despite calm, and despite not being his own alpha, the other pack’s alpha’s voice chilled Changbin to the bone, freezing him in his spot and making him wish he could just shrink and crawl between the floor boards and stay there forever.

The sand-coloured turned to look at his own pack members that were nearing him now, and without another word led them towards the door of the classroom, leaving.

If only it was that easy. But no, it wasn’t over yet. Not for Changbin. As the white wolf passed him, their eyes met. And Changbin had never seen so much disdain and disgust in a single glance, aimed at anyone, in his whole life. And growing up with his family, he’d seen a lot of both, aimed at him daily, but never this much. It would have been kinder if the other had just ripped his throat out on the spot. And he wasn’t even being dramatic.

It only lasted a second, but that second was enough to shatter Changbin’s heart. He barely noticed the silence that continued in the room even after the other pack had left, only barely registering when someone broke it.

“You will regret my wrath, ho ho ho!” Someone mocked, and several snickers answered them.

“Fear me, you bunch of stray dogs, for I am the supreme leader!” Another jeered, and more laughs echoed.

“Ay yo, Kungmin, got your ass handed to you by that scrawny kid, didn’t you?!” Yet another laughed, along with several more, and the muscle-guy glared at them.

“Shut the fuck up.”

“Or what, you’ll miss me with your punches, too?”

Changbin tuned it out, not giving a shit about the happenings behind them and instead following the small flow that was slowly moving out of the classroom, dazed.

“What an asshole! I told you, pretentious pricks, didn’t I? I wish someone would wipe that arrogant sneer of their collective faces, right?” Dowoon appeared next to him, slinging an arm around Changbin’s shoulders as he laughed. Changbin flinched, and Dowoon turned to look at him.

“Dude, what’s wrong with you?” He asked, raising a confused eyebrow at Changbin, and Changbin felt panic raise within him. He felt like the truth might not be received too well right now.

“Uh… Kinda sick. Got an elbow to my stomach when everyone was moving…” He lied, and Dowoon’s face turned sympathetic.

“Shit, that sucks. It wasn’t on purpose, though, everyone just needed to get away from those douches. Might catch parvo or something equally nasty if they come too close, I don’t know.” He joked, but Changbin didn’t feel better about it.

“I’ll just go lie down for a bit, hope it passes.” He announced, shrugging Dowoon’s arm off as the other started steering him down the hallway to the dorm they mostly met in as a pack, to go back to his own room.

“Dude, you sure? We’re celebrating tonight!”

What in the world was there to celebrate? Changbin shook his head.

“I’ll just end up puking on someone’s favourite shoes, it’s for the better.”

Dowoon made a disgusted face.

“Ew. Miss me with that. Well, see you tomorrow, then!”

Changbin nodded, heading back to his room. This time, he locked the door to his own room, too, so no one else could just barge in and drag him towards disaster. He left the lights out and opted to sit on the floor by the foot of his bed in pitch darkness, pulling his knees up and resting his forehead on top of them.

He could still see the look in Felix’s eyes as he had looked at him, every time he blinked, no matter if he closed his eyes or sat in darkness. It would forever be burned into his mind, he was sure of it, and he’d forever regret so many decisions he’d made. And all the things he’d gone along with that he hadn’t decided himself.

He wished he’d never been sent here in the first place, that was the thing he regretted the most. If he’d never even met Felix, he wouldn’t be feeling like this now. He also regretted ever telling Dowoon the seat next to him in the bus was free. If he hadn’t met him, he wouldn’t have become a member of this clearly wretched pack.

Well, maybe that wasn’t entirely true, he might still have been lured in. But maybe not that fast. Or maybe he would have, he couldn’t say that for sure.

He definitely regretted not having the backbone to stand up and say no to the things he didn’t agree with that happened in this pack. Started from the way everyone took for granted copying all his homework, over dragging him along for endless pack hangout sessions almost every evening, to cornering two kids as a whole pack with the sole intent of beating them up. It just wasn’t right.

But he, he was just a useless runt. He couldn’t stand up for anyone, not even himself, never mind someone else. Unconsciously, he rubbed at the bite mark low at the base of his neck, almost between his shoulders, the one marking him as runt, and silent tears started trickling down his face.

Useless. He was useless. And everyone knew it. Now, even Felix did.

***

Changbin was quiet the next morning at breakfast. He always was, but that morning even more so, and it kind of showed among the still rowdily celebrating pack.

“What’s up, your stomach still acting up?” Dowoon asked eventually.

“Kinda.” Changbin answered.

“Did you eat something bad?”

“I don’t know. I don’t think so.”

“Dude, if you got a stomach bug, keep it! Don’t go spreading that around!” Geumhyuk, who’d been following the conversation, interjected, giving him a grossed-out look. Changbin rolled his eyes, and Dowoon and Geumhyuk laughed. Why, he had no idea. He didn’t care, either.

“I’m not hungry. I’ll leave first.” He eventually announced, getting up.

It wasn’t so much that he wasn’t hungry, but that the pack’s celebrations killed his appetite.

That, and the knowledge that he was part of a group that celebrated hurting others. Something he would never do, and never wanted any part of. And now he was a part of it, by association. The guilt was like a crippling weight on his conscience.

No, he hadn’t been the one hurting those guys, not with his own hands. But he’d still been a part of the group blocking their way. And he’d done nothing to help them, either, despite knowing what they were going through was wrong. He hadn’t stood up for them, and he couldn’t even admit to his pack mates that that was what was really troubling him.

He dragged himself to the classroom his first class would be in, slumping into his chair to wait there and hope the day would be over soon.

The same routine repeated itself over the next day, and the one after that, and another, and another. He tried as much as possible to keep to himself, using the excuse that he still wasn’t feeling well all the time, until finally, the celebrations stopped, and normality returned to the pack.

It still didn’t change what had happened, and Changbin never felt the same sense of belonging he had in the beginning again. He started attending pack meetings again, hanging out with the others, making a conscious effort to participate in conversations and exchanges, but it never felt the same. He couldn’t fool himself into believing that incident had been a one-time thing and the members of the pack weren’t really all assholes. No matter if he ended up having fun sometimes, the memory of that day still lingered in his mind, especially the disgusted and disdainful look Felix had given him.

With every day he spent in the company of the pack, he felt more deserving of that look, too, and it chipped away at his soul. He didn’t want to be one of them anymore. Never wanted to be associated with what he associated them now, but he also didn’t have the courage to leave. Where would he even go, if he left? There were only two packs in the school, and he wanted to be part of neither. A lone wolf, he knew that too, wouldn’t have a chance, though. Especially not a runt. He was stuck.

***

Changbin was just minding his business, really, going from one classroom to another, when he happened upon a commotion in the hallway. He wanted no part of it, especially when he recognized members of his pack among the people almost blocking the hallway, and turned back around. He was sure he’d hate himself for turning a blind eye later, but he couldn’t stand seeing what was no doubt happening, either.

“Ay, Changbin! Come over here!” He froze. That was the voice of his alpha. He couldn’t disobey, so he turned back around and walked towards them, trying to look nonchalant.

“What’s up?”

“Where are you going? We’re throwing a party!”

Changbin swallowed.

“I, uh, forgot something for my next class in my room, I was about to go get it…”

His alpha snorted, waving him closer and draping an arm around Changbin’s shoulders.

“Next class can wait a bit. Here, look what a lovely little morsel we’ve found for ourselves here!” The other pack members parted for their alpha as he went to pass them, guiding Changbin with him. Changbin’s insides knotted as he spotted the kid they had circled. He knew who he was, it was the youngest member of the other pack, the one they doted on most and at all times. What was he doing here alone?

“Now, I know you are more brain than muscles, but surely you can take on someone like him?” The alpha offered, and Changbin felt bile rise.

“What? He’s just a kid!” Changbin blurted, freezing internally. He’d just fucked up, hadn’t he? To his surprise, the alpha laughed.

“Ah, come on, don’t act all offended! I know he’s a kid. He’s not a weakling, though. You won’t lose face if he hands you your ass, promise.”

Changbin couldn’t believe this. This couldn’t be happening. Shocked, he stared at the kid, noticing that he must already have been hit before, his lip bleeding and his face around his left eye swelling up already. He blinked, and then he was no longer seeing the kid. He was seeing himself instead. He’d been in that position before, and it fucking sucked. He couldn’t do this to the kid. Something within him snapped, and he stepped out of the alpha’s embrace. His gathered pack members cheered, but stopped, confused when he turned towards them.

“I’m not going to beat him up. He’s just a kid, for fucks sake! This is wrong!”

His alpha growled, narrowing his eyes.

“He’s a rat from the other pack. He’s in our territory. He brought this on himself.”

Changbin scoffed, his voice cracking from the adrenaline.

“This is a public school, there are no territories! Not outside our dorms!”

The pack protested, confused, angry, but looked at their alpha for guidance. Changbin could tell the alpha was not used to confrontation, and he didn’t deal well with it.

“You seem to not understand. This school is our territory. You better remember that and think really hard about where your loyalties lie when you make your next decision. You either pull your head out of your ass and do what I told you to and fucking fight that worm there, or you piss off and let me finish writing the memo for his pack on him myself!”

Changbin didn’t move. Seconds ticked by, and he didn’t move, staring his alpha down defiantly. More seconds passed, and eventually he saw the punch coming, but he didn’t move to dodge it. Maybe he should have, since he hadn’t expected it to be hard enough to send him to the floor even though he was braced. Maybe that was exactly what it took so the kid could take the chance to flee the scene. Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw that he managed to duck away, none of his pack focusing on him as he ran away, before his alpha grabbed him by the lapels and hoisted him up, slamming his back against the wall.

“Wrong decision.” The alpha growled, and his fist landed hard in Changbin’s stomach.

He stopped paying attention as fists hit him everywhere, replaced by feet kicking into him when he was allowed to slip to the floor, until the world turned black around him.


	3. Chapter 3 - Awaken

Jeongin ran as if the devil was after him. In a way, it was. Or could be. He didn’t dare look back to see if any of the members from the other pack were after him until he ran into the door to his pack’s dorm.

He didn’t bother to stop to knock, hitting the door with his whole body before starting to frantically slam his flat hands against the surface. Someone had to be in, he was sure of it. He didn’t think to reach for his own key, just hoping someone would open that damn door, and quickly.

It felt much longer, but the door opened after just a few seconds, and Jeongin squeezed through the crack as soon as it formed, barreling into Woojin.

The older stumbled but was thankfully still holding onto the door handle to steady himself, and Jeongin, so neither fell to the floor.

“Innie-…”

Jeongin turned on his heels, slamming the door shut behind him, and only then did he relax. Somewhat.

“Innie, what the hell- Shit, what happened to your face?!” Woojin almost shrieked, taking a step closer and reaching out to touch his swelling face.

Jeongin reached the end of his capacity for composure and closed the distance between them, falling into Woojin’s arms, tears immediately falling freely.

“Oh, baby, shh. I got you. I got you, you’re safe, it’s ok. Come, let’s go inside.”

Jeongin let Woojin maneuver him into the common area of the dorm, sitting down on one of the couches with him.

“What happened?” Minho’s voice sounded suddenly, and Jeongin could feel Woojin shrug, still holding him. He felt a hand on his back then.

“Innie?”

“Not yet, Minho. Give him a moment.”

Jeongin was grateful for that, letting Woojin hold him, stroke his back, while Minho petted his head, combing his fingers through his hair, reassuring him quietly that he was safe with their presence and contact. He was safe now, it eventually sunk in, and his tears dried. He was safe. They could no longer get to him. That other kid had saved him.

That other kid. He wasn’t safe.

He sat up abruptly.

“They are going to kill him!”

Woojin and Minho jumped.

“Who’s going to kill who?”

“The other kid! They were hitting him, he’s alone, they won’t let him get away. We have to help him!”

Woojin and Minho shared a confused look.

“What? Innie, you have to start from the beginning. What happened? Why do you look like you got beaten up, and who else is getting hit?” Woojin tried, calmly.

“I-I… I got cornered by the alpha of the other pack and some of his cronies, and they shoved me around and slapped me a few times, but then the new kid that just transferred recently showed up and they stopped and called him over and they told him to fight me, but he refused and told them it was wrong, and he didn’t back off when the alpha told him to, and they turned on him, and I ran away. He has no one to defend him, and they are going to kill him, hyung, please, someone needs to go help him!” He rambled on, tripping over his words and giving the two older ones pleading looks.

“But, isn’t he a member of the other pack?” Minho asked, wary.

“That has never stopped them from turning on someone, has it? And they are beating him up because of me, please, you need to go and help him!”

“He isn’t being beaten because of you, Innie. He made the decision to defy his pack on his own. A pack he chose to join himself.”

Jeongin looked past Woojin, at the newcomer. It was their alpha, Chan.

“But he protected me! It’s not right to let him suffer for that!”

Chan sighed, crouching down on the floor in front of the couch and placing his hands on Jeongin’s knees, looking up at him.

“It isn’t right, no. But it’s how it goes. It’s a pack affair from the other pack, and not something we can interfere with. We don’t want them interfering with our pack affairs, either, do we? It was nice of that kid to defend you, and I am grateful for it, but whatever consequences he has to suffer for that from the alpha he chose to join, he has to deal with himself.”

Jeongin gaped at the leader.

“Hyung! But… they could kill him!”

Chan flinched, but shook his head.

“I don’t think they’ll go that far. I don’t think they are going to risk the consequences for that.”

“But if they’re not thinking-…”

“Innie, there is nothing we can do. Even if we want to. It would be different if he was from our pack, but he isn’t.” Woojin tried, softer, but Jeongin didn’t want to hear it. He shoved himself out of Woojin’s embrace, shook off Minho’s hands and stood up, making Chan stumble backwards.

“There has to be! He saved me! He could die because of that and it will be my fault and you just don’t care!”

Ignoring whatever else the three oldest were trying to say, Jeongin broke free from them and ran to his room, slamming the door shut behind him before throwing himself onto his bed, crying again.

***

It was quite a while later when a knock sounded on his door. His tears had dried again, but he was still upset. Very upset. And he didn’t want to see the older ones, who were so stubbornly ignoring the fact that someone’s life was in danger because of him. Or maybe it had already ended, who knew? The only answer he gave the knock was a growl.

“Jeonginnie? It’s me. Can I come in? Please?”

Felix. Felix was ok, he wasn’t mad at him. He sighed.

“Yeah.” He muttered into his pillow, not bothering to move.

The door cracked open, and Felix peeked inside, before opening it further, slipping in and closing it again. He sat on the edge of Jeongin’s bed quietly, letting silence hang between them for quite a while.

“How are you feeling?” He asked eventually, though. Jeongin growled.

“How would you feel if someone might have been killed because of you?”

Felix sighed.

“It’s not your fault, Innie-…”

“Stop. I don’t want to hear it. I already got the bullshit from the hyungs. He defended me. If I hadn’t been caught alone by those assholes, he wouldn’t have had to defend me. Actually, he still didn’t have to defend me. He did because he’s _not_ an asshole like the rest of them. He could have just punched me straight in the face like anyone else of them would and go on with his merry day. He didn’t, though. And we thanked it by leaving him to die. We’re just as big assholes as they are.”

Felix sighed again.

“I’m sorry, Innie…”

“Don’t. Sorry won’t fix anything.”

Silence settled again, but it was uncomfortable.

“I can go see if I can find out something, at least, I guess? Find out if he’s ok?”

Jeongin huffed.

“He won’t be ok. He was already not ok when I took off. The first punch alone almost broke his neck, and it was by far not the only one he received.”

“Still… I could make sure he’s at least not dead? And not being hurt, still? Would that make you feel better?”

Jeongin wanted to tell him no, it wouldn’t. What would it change if Felix went only to most likely come back with the news the other had been killed? Yeah, that would make him feel so much better, sure. He stopped himself, though. It wasn’t Felix fault. Felix had been in class when someone else could have done something, unaware of what was going on. And he at least was trying to come up with something to do, something to make him feel better.

“I guess…” He answered instead.

***

Felix traced the faint smell Jeongin had left on his way back to the dorm earlier to where the fight must have happened. The smell of Jeongin’s fear was the strongest in that hallway, but there was nothing there.

Well, at first glance. At second and third glance, and with a heightened sense of smell, something was there.

Felix stepped closer to the wall, noticing the faint traces of the fight on it. A hair here, scraped skin there. On the floor next to it, even droplets of blood. His stomach twisted uncomfortably, but he kept looking, memorizing the smell of the person who’d bled there. The smell was unfamiliar, not one he’d focused on before, but there was something else to it. Something he couldn’t quite put his finger on.

He stared tracing the smell and found he didn’t even need a heightened sense of smell to do so. There were visible traces on the tiles of the floor, smeared blood as if someone bleeding had been dragged.

He wouldn’t put it past those guys to drag an injured person across the floor. He was sure if anyone was capable of doing something like that, those guys were it.

They didn’t drag him far, though, he found, the traces disappearing behind a door.

He tried the handle, not expecting it to give, and startled when it did. He checked his surroundings thoroughly to make sure he wouldn’t be jumped while not paying attention, before focusing on what lay behind the door. He couldn’t hear any noise at first, until he picked up on the shallow noise of breathing. Very shallow. Stuttering. And nothing else.

He pushed the door open further, searching the wall next to it for a light-switch. The lights flickered on, and he was once again surprised, this time by how tiny the room was. It wasn’t even a real room, more like a supply closet, and there, on the floor, between buckets and rags and brooms-…

“Holy fucking shit!” Felix cursed under his breath. He had no idea someone could look this torn up and still breathe.

“Holy shit. Shit shit shit.” He muttered to himself, crouching down. As he got closer, he could hear the heartbeat of the guy, stuttering just like his breathing.

He might not be dead yet like Jeongin feared, but he surely wasn’t far from it. And he’d clearly been left to die here.

Felix bit his lip, debating what to do. He couldn’t leave him here to die, no. But if he tried to move him to the infirmary and he died on the way there and he was stuck with the corpse-… He didn’t finish that thought. He couldn’t leave him to die here, period!

Without debating any further, he moved to pick the boy up, only stalling shortly as he noticed how unnaturally light the other felt, and took off to the infirmary.

He was sure it must have been less than comfortable for the other to be carried and jostled around like that, but no sound of complaint came from him.

Eventually, halfway to his destination, Felix had to stop and check if the other was still breathing, just to make sure. To his relief, he was. He wasn’t running through his school with a corpse in his arms; yet.

He thanked science and technological progress for automatic doors as he reached the infirmary, barging through and into the sterile smelling area behind it.

“What in the name of-…!” The nurse exclaimed, rushing over as soon as he spotted Felix, and Felix deposited the boy on the first cot he came by.

“What did you do?!” The nurse demanded, and Felix squared up, defensive.

“I didn’t do anything! I found him like this and brought him here, that’s all.”

The nurse glared at him skeptically.

“Why would you care? He’s not from _your_ pack.”

Felix rolled his eyes.

“So, am I supposed to let someone die in a supply closet just because he’s not a member of my pack now? Can you at least focus on not letting him die after I carried him all the way here?”

The nurse’s glare intensified.

“Don’t get cocky with me, boy. This is going to have consequences!”

Felix gaped at him.

“I didn’t do anything, I swear! Nor did anyone of my pack! His own pack did that!”

“I’m tired of patching up people because of your stupid pack wars! I don’t care! This will come to an end! Now get out of here, I have work to do! Shoo!”

Felix kept gaping at the man, until he was shoved out the door. How in the world was that fair! He had just helped a guy from another pack when he didn’t have to, and now he was going to be punished for it?! Fuck it all! He wanted to scream, but held it in. He might have kicked a trashcan hard enough the next person would be able to tell his shoe size from the dent he left in it, but otherwise controlled his anger as he made his way back to his dorm.

He ran straight into Chan when he came in, just what he needed.

“Hey, Fe-… Wow. What’s wrong with you?”

Felix huffed.

“Nothing, everything’s peachy. Just learned again how no good deed goes unpunished, or however that saying goes.”

Chan’s brow creased, while Felix plopped down onto the couch.

“How so?”

“I promised Innie to go find out what happened to the guy who protected him earlier. By the way, Innie is really upset with your stance on that, and he won’t forgive you, or himself, if he doesn’t make it. Anyway. I found him in a supply closet. They left him there, probably to die. I don’t know, he wouldn’t have made it there much longer, I’m sure. Brought him to the infirmary. And -yay and congratulations to me!- got accused of being the one at fault for putting him in the state he was in and threatened with consequences.”

Chan frowned.

“Felix…”

“Yeah, yeah, I know, not my pack, not my business. Should I have left him to die there, though? Should I? And then live the rest of my life with the knowledge that I had the power to save him when no one else would, but didn’t? Just because he wasn’t part of the same pack I was?”

Chan sighed heavily, rubbing his temple as if he could feel a headache coming on.

“I know it’s hard, but-…”

“No, hyung. Fuck packs and all that shit. He’s a person. A living, sentient being, before all else. Before he is a wolf, and from whatever pack. And he protected Jeonginnie, for the same reasons. He deserves the same courtesy from us.”

Chan couldn’t really deny that logic, not in good faith.

“Fine. But you showed him that courtesy on our behalf now, and we are even. He is not our responsibility from now on. Whatever consequences you’ll suffer from it, we’ll deal with it, and after that, I don’t want anyone else getting in trouble because of him. No one. Understood?” Chan looked around, finding the eyes of each other member of the pack, who had all congregated in the meantime, upon hearing the discussion between him and Felix.

He got no verbal answer, but he trusted them enough that they knew he meant it and wouldn’t go against his order.

***

To everyone’s surprise, the whole school was called to meet up in one of the gym halls the next day. Most had no clue what that could have been about, but the few who did gathered nervously. At least most of those; by far not all.

As soon as the headmaster entered through the double doors as well, silence fell over the gathered students. The man did not look pleased, and he didn’t waste time with pleasantries as he started to speak.

“Some of you might have an idea why I gathered you here, some of you don’t. To leave no one out of the loop, I chose to gather you all here.

“Yesterday afternoon, a fellow student of yours was severely beaten up and left for dead in a supply closet by one of the resident wolf packs. As of now, his condition is still critical, and there is no guaranty that he’ll make it.

“I’d like to inform you that should he succumb to the injuries he sustained, the culprits will be charged with first degree murder. It might be common practice among wolves to kill each other without batting an eye outside these walls, but in this school, that will not be tolerated. As long as you are enrolled here, you are ruled and have to abide by our laws.

“That being said, the forming of packs has been tolerated so far seeing as it is part of wolf culture, but it is not an inherent right. This is the last warning I am giving you. From now on, if there is even the slightest transgression from any member of either pack, the forming and continued existence of any pack will be forbidden. Should it come to that, failure to abide by this decree will be punished with immediate expulsion from this school for all involved.

“Those of you who aren’t wolves, in fact the vast majority of you, I’d like to remind you that reporting incidents involving violence of any kind is in the best interest of everyone in this school, so do not hesitate to report it should you witness them.

“You are dismissed.”

With that, the headmaster left, leaving no time for protests or questions. As soon as the doors closed behind them, both packs were given a wide berth by their peers, intense whispering rising over the mass of students which gradually became louder and louder.

Felix stood frozen in his place, unmoving. The news that the kid was still alive should feel relieving, but the fact it was still unsure if he would make it weighed heavier on him than he would have thought.

Someone squeezed his shoulder, and he looked up, finding Chan giving him a reassuring look.

“He said ‘culprits’, Felix. He knows it wasn’t you. You won’t be charged with murder, no matter what happens.”

For some reason, that thought, which admittedly should be his main concern, hadn’t even crossed his mind. Still, he nodded lamely.

“I know. I know…”

Chan squeezed his shoulder again, then turned back to the other member of his pack that had apparently also been quite affected by the headmaster’s speech; Jeongin.

“Innie, they won’t force us apart. It was just a warning.”

“But what if one of _them_ does something and- It’s not something we can control! And then they’ll-”

“Jeongin, our pack is not some kind of chess club you can forbid just like that. We are a family. We share a bond. That doesn’t go away just because someone forbids it.” Chan tried to soothe the youngest, but it wasn’t easy.

“If we stay together, they’ll kick us out!”

Chan shook his head, gathering the pup in his arms.

“Let them. Even if that happened and they do kick us out, I won’t let anything happen to you. To any of you. I’ll take care of you. I promise.”

“Hyung, how-…”

“I am your alpha, am I not? That is what I’m here for. Don’t worry about it, Innie; that is my job, too, not yours.”

Jeongin looked like he wanted to protest, but eventually gave in to the alpha’s soothing hug, snuggling against him.

If only Felix’ worries were as easy to soothe, too.

***

Changbin had no idea where he was or what time or even day it was when he woke up. He was in a sterile, white room that smelled so unbearably clean it hurt his nose. He was alone, and it was eerily quiet. Actually, that wasn’t true, it would have been quiet if it wasn’t for the incessant humming and faint beeping of various machines attached to him.

As soon as he became aware of the different tubes leading to his body, he also became aware of the one still in his throat, and a violent coughing fit, paired with gagging shook him as he scrambled to get it _off._ He was too weak to do much of anything, the contraption securing the tube in place not budging as he continued to cough, unaware that it was his source of oxygen as the airflows continued to clash in his lungs and trachea.

Pain overwhelmed him as his coughs strained against his ribs, and tears blinded him as he continued to fight pathetically until something -someone? More than one- pushed him down by his shoulders, secured his arms, and suddenly the tube in his throat was moving, shifting, leaving, and he felt like he could breathe again. Inhaling hurt, but he didn’t stop, not until he felt his lungs filling as much as possible.

He ignored whoever else was with him in the room, still holding him down as he gasped for breath through the pain in his ribs, in his throat, ignoring it all. It took a while before he acknowledged the people around him, wondering who the hell they were.

“Where am I?” he croaked out, voice scratchy and foreign from disuse, his vocal chords feeling dry and stretched from the breathing tube and lack of use.

“Hospital. Can you tell us your name?”

Changbin frowned but answered.

“Seo Changbin.”

“Do you know what day it is?”

Changbin blinked, trying to remember. Thinking hurt, but he thought he vaguely remembered…

“Tuesday?”

“Date?”

Changbin huffed, trying to relax his muscles, which seemed to cramp uncomfortably all over his body. It didn’t work.

“October 5th?” That was the last date he could remember checking, but then again, he’d never been good at remembering the date. It was enough for him to know the day of the week.

His gaze finally focused enough to identify a nurse who was checking the machines next to him and the tubes still attached to his arms, his fingers, his everywhere, so it seemed.

He decided to focus on the doctor instead, who was scribbling on a clipboard.

“Changbin, do you remember how you got here?”

Changbin couldn’t, for the life of him.

“Ok. Do you remembered what caused you to end up here?”

Changbin had no idea, either, quite honestly, and it made him feel a little dumb.

“Uh… something fucked me up?”

The doctor ignored his choice of language.

“Do you know what it was?”

“No.”

“What is the last thing you remember, before waking up here?”

Changbin’s head was starting to pound unmercifully as he tried to recall.

“History class?”

The doctor relented, scribbling that down on her clipboard, but didn’t continue her interrogation, instead telling him to rest. Changbin was too tired to tell her that would have been what he would have done either way, now, since he was too tired to continue trying to think.

Days passed; maybe it was weeks, or maybe it was just hours, Changbin didn’t know. He slept a lot and spent very little time awake. He didn’t learn why or how he’d ended up in the hospital, no one told him. Eventually, he started staying awake for longer times, though, and at some point, a nurse slipped up and answered his question about what day it was. November 10th. He was missing over a month. He willed himself not to freak out, but did demand an explanation the next time a doctor checked up on him.

“You were severely injured, and a classmate brought you to your school’s infirmary. You were in a coma for three weeks, but you woke up sooner than anyone would have expected. You were very lucky.”

Testing his ribs, Changbin didn’t feel very lucky. It beat being dead, though, he supposed. He also wondered who had brought him to the infirmary, and why the hell he had needed to be brought there in the first place.

“If you can’t remember that, it is not my place to tell you. It seems you suffered a form of non-injury-related retrograde amnesia which the brain sometimes adopts to cope with traumatic experiences.”

“Non-injury-related?”

That must be a joke, Changbin thought. There wasn’t a piece of him that hadn’t sustained any injury, even if most of them had mostly healed by the time he’d first woken up.

“It means your brain sustained no injury.”

Well, small blessings.

It took another week before Changbin was given the all clear to leave and return to the school. An uneasy feeling settled in him as he eyed the thin-lipped fae that had been charged with picking him up from the hospital.

“Your things have been moved to a different dorm.” The fae informed him as he made to walk down the hallway to his room.

“Why?” He asked, innocently. The fae looked at him incredulously for a moment, before understanding flashed in his eyes.

“Right, amnesia… You’ll find out eventually. Might want to avoid the packs from now on, though.”

Changbin didn’t understand, but something ugly moved in his gut at the mention of packs. He followed the fae to a different dorm, quite far away from any of the dorms that any members of his pack inhabited.

His pack. Was it his pack anymore? He wasn’t sure. Should it not be anymore? Why? He had no idea, but something told him to heed the fae’s warning.

“This is your key. Try to stay out of trouble from now on.”

Changbin nodded, accepting the key. It wasn’t like he had ever actively tried to get into trouble… right? Anyway, he had no intentions of getting into trouble any time soon. Not even after his ribs were healed, but most definitely not before that, either.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4 - Be My Guest

Chapter 4

Changbin didn’t look for trouble, but trouble had a way of finding its way to him. He still didn’t remember what had happened, but he quickly learned that somehow, he must have antagonized his old pack. He most definitely wasn’t a part of it anymore. For some reason, he felt almost relieved at that. Almost, because said old pack never passed up a chance to remind him he was no longer part of their ranks.

He didn’t exactly regret not being a part of the pack anymore, but he was also quickly getting tired of their never-ending attention. Especially the sharp elbows to his ribs when passing them in the hallways, those really sucked. The paper balls and pencils thrown at him in class he could live with, if he had to, but his slowly healing ribs really hated the elbow treatment.

Apparently, the members of his old pack weren’t the only ones paying attention to him anymore, though. He learned that one morning during breakfast.

He had just sat down with his food, on a lonely table off to the side and away from any hubbub, when some jackass he didn’t even bother to remember the name of passed by him and dumped a whole handful of dirt on his tray. Leaves, sand, sticks and pebbles covered his food and swam in his drink, effectively ruining the meal.

He sighed softly after the guy and his two friends left, cajoling loudly as they congratulated themselves and each other for successfully ruining Changbin’s start of the day.

Changbin was too tired to get mad over the ordeal. There was no point to it, anyway. Resigning himself to spending at least the first half of the day hungry, he got up to put his tray away and make his way to the classroom he’d have the first class of the day in. At least the hallways were empty if everyone was busy eating, and no one would elbow him in the ribs.

Instead, just as he put his soiled tray in the designated cart for it, someone appeared next to him and shoved a wrapped sandwich into his hands. He barely had time to process what it was he was holding, when the person already darted off again. He barely caught a glimpse of their face, but for some reason it looked familiar.

As the day went on, he kept thinking about it, but it wasn’t until the afternoon that it clicked when he saw the boy again, with the alpha of the other pack. It was their youngest. But why had he given him a sandwich out of nowhere? Not that he minded, it had been a good sandwich and it had helped him get through his morning classes without his stomach trying to digest itself for lack of food, but he still wondered.

Other than on that one occasion, the members of the other pack seemed to ignore him, for the most part, he found. Including the youngest.

To his surprise, though, he found himself being watched by none other than the white wolf, Felix, a few days later. His heart nearly stopped as his gaze found the other’s, and to his dismay, Felix didn’t even pretend he hadn’t been watching him. Changbin was the one who ended up averting his gaze, fleeing the room as soon as possible. He spent the rest of the day uncomfortably jittery, watching his surroundings more than usual. The only good thing coming from that was that he recognized his old pack mates before they saw him and managed to avoid them better than ever before. For once, he was actually glad to be so small, able to duck behind other people before he was spotted by those he didn’t want to spot him.

His newfound vigilance seemed to anger his old pack, though, and they renewed their efforts to find him. They weren’t always successful, but often enough to ruin Changbin’s days. It was another such day when he had apparently been tailed for a while, while someone else prepared something vile. That something vile turned out to be a pitcher of dirty water, pieces of rotting leaves and mud still swimming in it as it was dumped over his head.

Changbin froze for a moment too long as the reeking liquid soaked into his clothes, holding his breath at the foul smell. It was long enough for a door to open and him being shoved through it. He stumbled, his feet catching on something on the floor, and he fell. He hit a number of things as he tumbled to the floor, some harder than others, but couldn’t identify any of them as it was suddenly pitch black in the room.

He caught his breath sharply as he took stock of himself, head and shoulders soaked in stinking water, knee bruised -possibly scraped?- from the fall, palm throbbing, since he’d caught most of his weight with it. Other than that, only the foul smell of the water affected him; well, and the fact it was cold in this room.

He felt around himself in the dark, not daring to get up just yet lest he fall over something again, and quickly found he was surrounded by what must be cleaning utensils: brooms, buckets, rags and mops, among several bottles of what were most likely cleaning products. Once he managed to get over the smell of the water in his hair and clothes, he was finally able to smell those, too.

For some reason, that smell didn’t sit well with him, at all. His heart was beating uncomfortably, as if it didn’t have enough room to expand in his chest, his breathing catching in his throat, as if his lungs refused to breathe the air infused with the smell of the products.

The lack of oxygen didn’t help him get his bearings, and he ended up stumbling to his feet despite his earlier decision to be careful so he wouldn’t fall again. He managed not to fall until he reached a wall, which, to be honest, hadn’t been far from where he’d fallen after all. He felt along that wall rather frantically, hoping to find the door in the darkness. And he did, it didn’t even take him long, but he didn’t seem to be able to find a handle for the life of him. There didn’t seem to be one where there should be one, and his search grew more frantic, patting around in the dark as his breathing grew more and more labored.

Until, the door opened by itself, light flooding in and momentarily blinding Changbin. He stumbled out of the supplies closet, uncaring if he would fall again. He probably would have, too, but someone caught him by the shoulders before he could, helping him regain his footing. His eyes eventually adjusted to the light in the hallway, and he finally saw the face of his savior.

He knew that face, too. If he wasn’t mistaken, this was the mate of the other pack’s alpha, the brown wolf that kind of reminded him of a bear. Fear coursed through him as that recognition hit him, and the other slowly let go of him, taking a step back. He observed Changbin for a moment longer, as if to make sure he would be able to stand on his own two feet now, before nodding once, mostly to himself, and starting past Changbin without uttering a single word.

Changbin stared after him as if he’d seen a ghost.

Eventually, after catching Felix watching him _again_ at some point, Changbin concluded that something must have happened involving a member of the other pack, back then, shortly before whatever happened that had put him in the hospital for six weeks. It bothered him that he couldn’t figure out what it was, but whenever he tried to think about it, he gave himself a headache. He supposed that if he wanted to know more about what happened, he had to ask someone. Unfortunately, he didn’t know who to ask.

He discarded the possibility to ask his new dorm-mates first. Two nymphs and a fae, they avoided him like the plague. None of them wanted anything to do with him, probably out of fear of incurring one of the packs’ wrath. The same went for pretty much any non-wolf in the whole school. Changbin couldn’t even blame them.

He couldn’t ask anyone from his old pack, either. He didn’t want to get close enough to even see one of them, never mind talk to them. But also, he didn’t want to ask anyone from the other pack. They probably wouldn’t give him the time of day to finish his question, anyway. That left him with exactly zero options to find out what had happened that ended with him in a coma and afterwards with retrograde amnesia.

Then again, he didn’t need to find out what exactly had happened to know he was on his own once again. He didn’t know if he should be glad he knew the feeling intimately or curse the fact that he was left alone once again in his life. Being somewhat of an expert in all things loneliness did help him deal with his current situation, but it also made him reckless in ways he hadn’t been before. It was as if being thrown back into the lonely pit had flipped a switch to a side of him he hadn’t known he possessed before.

He first learned about that side of himself one afternoon when he’d decided to hole himself up in the library to study (and also because he’d learned that most of the members of his old pack would rather bite their own tails off than ever set foot into that particular part of the school).

Most days, that knowledge was foolproof. That day, it was not.

He had chosen one of the more secluded places to sit, hidden away so it wasn’t easy to spot, but also easy to abandon through a number of escape routes. It was becoming one of his favourite spots, especially because he hadn’t been found there yet.

On his way there on that particular day, he passed a kid he recognized from the other pack. He was sitting half buried in a couple of books, not paying him any mind, but Changbin still recognized him as one of the two kids his old pack had cornered on that one day. It was the smaller of the two, the one who’d managed to trick and evade the beefy brute for so long. In a way, Changbin envied him that skill, even if it hadn’t helped much for long back then. At least it had helped him long enough, if only just.

As Changbin continued on his way to his own favourite spot, he eventually forgot about the boy again, focusing on his own worries. He had essays to write, homework to do, and studying to catch up on. He’d missed out on a lot during those six weeks he’d been absent! He’d be lucky if he wouldn’t have to repeat the year…

His until then as peaceful as possible study session was interrupted after about an hour, quiet hissing and growling filtering through the rows of shelves to him. He frowned, the hostility in the noises raising his hackles. Before he could think about what he was doing, he rose from his chair and followed the noises.

He wasn’t even surprised to find two of his former pack mates cornering the wolf from the other pack, who sat rigidly in his chair, barely even blinking as one of the two other wolves snarled a threat at him.

Changbin stepped out from his hidden spot between the bookshelves, clearing his throat.

“Hey! Can you keep it down? There’s people who actually want to study in here!” His loud voice carried easily through the quiet library, attracting the attention of one of the librarians, who fixed them with an annoyed stare.

Under her gaze, the two standing wolves could do little else than grit their teeth and growl low in their throats as they left the library.

Changbin deflated visibly once they left his field of vision, and his own sigh of relief almost drowned out the little noise of disapproval from the remaining wolf, who was slowly getting up and starting to pack his things up, too.

“You shouldn’t put yourself on the line like that. You’ll get in trouble if you keep doing that.”

Changbin huffed at that.

“Who cares, anyway…” he muttered under his breath, turning his back at the other and returning to his own table, hidden away at the back.

Maybe he shouldn’t have done that, and the other was right. But he didn’t find it in himself to care if that had been a smart move or not. If no one else cared, why should he?

***

It was a blatant lie that he didn’t care what happened to him, he just didn’t want to care. It was easier that way. He still loathed it that his former pack seemed to know no other past-times than search for him, corner him, and usually quickly and quietly ruin his day -often along with whatever he was wearing, his food and if he was especially unlucky, his school work.

Usually they were quick and quiet; not always, though. Some days, they managed to get a hold of him somewhere without many ears and eyes, and then they took their time.

Changbin wanted to kick himself for thinking no one would bother him out in the secluded courtyard he’d chosen to soak up some of the rare rays of winter sunshine. Of course they would, if they found him, and they had found him. Now it looked like one of _them_ would get the honours of kicking him for that stupidity.

He grit his teeth as he was shoved once again, refusing to answer to the taunting questions that were being hissed in his ear whenever he stumbled too close to someone, and before being shoved over to the next person.

He stumbled eventually, tripping over his feet and falling to the ground. The pack members that had gathered in the meantime snickered, clearly still trying to keep their voices low, for whatever reason Changbin didn’t understand. They were growing restless, though, and as he scrambled to get back onto his feet, he saw how one of them was being encouraged by his peers to step out of the circle and _do something._

Just as he seemed like he would, a grow sounded behind the gathered pack members, and Changbin would have recognized that growl anywhere, it’s bone chilling quality ingrained deeply in his memory.

Apparently, he wasn’t the only one, as the other guys hastily stepped out of the way to make room for the large sand-coloured alpha.

There was so much disdain in the wolf’s features as he regarded the members of Changbin’s old pack that it chilled his bones, even if this time this kind of look wasn’t directed at him. It didn’t matter, he was sure nothing would ever surpass the disdain in Felix’ look back then, and that had been directly aimed at him.

“You must be really stupid, huh? If you’re tired of this place, why don’t you just do everyone a favour and leave quietly?” The alpha growled, shaking his head before turning to Changbin.

“Come.” He only had a single word for Changbin before he averted his gaze and started to leave, but there was no way Changbin would have ever been able to disobey that command, and so he hurried after him, unsure of what would become of him.

As they rounded the building, Changbin could see the rest of the alpha’s pack gathered around a picnic table under one of the trees on the lawn. Silence fell over them when they spotted Changbin trailing behind the sand-coloured wolf, and Changbin felt his insides turn to stone, feet getting heavier with every step.

What did the alpha have planned with him? Why was he leading him to his pack? Changbin could feel bile rise in his throat, but he was unable to stop following the alpha until they reached the table. With a motion so fluid Changbin almost missed it, the alpha shifted from wolf to human form, sitting down on one side of the table, and nodded at a free spot on the other bench as he leaned against his mate.

“Sit.”

It didn’t carry the weight of an alpha’s order, but Changbin didn’t resist it, either. What else could he do? He felt every single nerve in his body stand on end as he did so, at the very end of the bench, the tension in the air palpable as the pack around him seemed to communicate through their bond, until eventually, half of the members stood up and left without a word. Changbin wasn’t surprised to see Felix was one of them.

The alpha sighed once they were out of hearing range, and the remaining pack members untensed. The alpha’s mate went back to eating the packaged chicken in front of him unbothered, and the two younger members followed his example, while the alpha didn’t move.

Changbin didn’t, either, until the alpha’s mate looked up from his chicken and noticed his rigid posture.

“Have you eaten yet?” He asked, not unkind. Changbin shook his head.

“Did you bring any food?”

Changbin shook his head again, deciding to spare them the tale of how what he’d packed from the cafeteria had been taken from him earlier.

To his surprise, a sandwich appeared on the table in front of him. Looking at the source, the boy next to him, he recognized the youngest of the pack, giving him an encouraging look.

“I always bring too many, anyway. Go ahead.”

Changbin gaped at the kid, before turning to look at the alpha, as if asking for confirmation that it was ok. The alpha sighed, nodded and sat up, before stealing a piece of chicken from his mate’s bundle, earning him an exasperated glare.

Changbin reached for the sandwich hesitantly, expecting to be reprimanded at any moment, but it seemed he was actually ignored. Not wanting to offend the pack by not accepting their hospitality, he forced himself to eat it, despite his stomach still feeling as if it had been filled with rocks instead. At least it was tasty, helping him somewhat.

The lunch break eventually neared its end, and everyone started packing their things up, leaving Changbin to do the same, until he was startled out of his silence.

“What class do you have next?”

He jumped, looking up from where he’d been balling up the wrapper of the sandwich.

“M-me?”

The alpha’s mate nodded.

“Maths… With professor Park.”

The other wolf nodded.

“We should get going, then.”

Changbin’s eyes widened, but he didn’t dare contradict the other, getting up hastily.

“Lead the way.”

There was no way Changbin’s nerves could fray any more than they already were as the other wolf walked behind him all the way to his classroom, staying far enough away to not invade his personal space, but close enough to allow no misunderstandings about who he was walking with. As they reached the door to the classroom, Changbin stopped, and so did the other.

“We were given some new rules, while you were… out.” The other started, and Changbin turned around to face him.

“If any kind of incident involving wolves is reported, they’ll ban us from forming or staying in packs.”

Changbin felt dread well up in him, thinking he could tell where this conversation was going, but he wasn’t prepared for what the other said next.

“I just thought you should know. I don’t blame you for any of this, though. If you hadn’t stepped in, it would have been our Jeonginnie in your situation, and the rule would have come anyway.”

Changbin felt his head starting to hurt, and he reached up to rub at his temple.

“W-why?”

The other gave him a curious look, tilting his head.

“Did you really lose your memory of that day?”

Changbin bit his lip, shifting uncomfortably.

“You did, didn’t you. Do you want to know what happened?”

Changbin wasn’t so sure anymore, but he nodded anyway. It was now or possibly never.

“You stood up for Jeongin when your alpha had him cornered and allowed him to flee. You took the beating for him.”

Changbin’s head was pounding painfully now, still repressing the memory.

“I… I did?”

“Yeah. Thanks for that, by the way. If it had been Jeongin who’d gotten beat up like that, Chan would have torn your whole pack apart and I would only ever have been able to see my mate in prison for the rest of our lives after he’d been convicted for mass murder.”

Changbin had a feeling that on some days, he would wish he had let that happen from now on. He didn’t know what to say to that, though.

“Anyway. Maybe try to use the knowledge that they’d be risking the existence of their pack and expulsion against them to keep them from harassing you. Hanging out in secluded places, like today… That’s probably not the best idea for you.” The other wolf concluded, straightening up.

“I gotta go now. Stay out of trouble!”

He left, and Changbin shook his head at himself, wondering if that had been a dream just now. Except, his head was hurting for real, and it felt as if there was something, just below the surface, that was trying to break free. It didn’t quite manage, no matter how much it struggled, though, only succeeding in keeping up the headache. Changbin could still not remember a single thing about when he’d supposedly been beaten up by his pack for standing up to the kid from the other pack. But at least, that explained why the kid, Jeongin, was friendly enough to share his sandwiches with him.

***

Despite taking the other wolf’s advice to heart and trying to stay in populated places where it was less likely to get ambushed by his old pack, the incidents with them still didn’t stop. If he managed to stay in the populated areas most of the time, they would find the few minutes a day he couldn’t avoid the lesser populated areas to corner him.

Ever since the other pack’s alpha had gotten him out of the hairy situation in the courtyard, it seemed like his old pack had become meaner, too. The purpose of the harassment seemed to have changed, too, and even though it felt ridiculous, Changbin could almost swear the pack was trying to win him back. Only the way they went about it had the exact opposite effect.

“I know it’s not one of your strengths, but you better choose your allegiances wisely, runt!” One of the alpha’s cronies hissed in his ear one day as he rammed his elbow into Changbin’s solar plexus in passing.

Changbin wheezed, trying to catch his breath, when another approached him.

“Recognize a chance when it’s given to you. We aren’t known to forgive!” He hissed, and Changbin was thankfully able to dodge the concealed hit aimed at him.

He was being forgiven? It had to be a bad joke. Forgiven for what? Not dying at their hands? Yeah, right. He could live without that forgiveness. He surely didn’t plan to take a second chance at having his life ended prematurely.

Some days, he didn’t really feel like he was being given a choice in the matter, though. And some days, he was really fucking tired of the other pack’s shit. He just wanted to be left alone, make it through the days in peace, and in one piece. That, too, wasn’t up to him, unfortunately. And despite making sure to stay in areas with more other people, that didn’t help him in the slightest if those people decided to turn a blind eye on what was happening.

And so, it came he was being pushed against a wall, held up by the front of his jacket with his feet dangling several centimeters off the ground one evening after a long rainy, cold, grey, all round disgusting day that did nothing for his mood.

“We’re getting really tired of your shit, runt!” The guy holding him up snarled in his face.

Well, big deal, Changbin was really tired of _their_ shit, too, but did that change anything?

“You don’t have a choice. Come back while we’re still asking you nicely! Remember, lone wolves don’t survive…” He pushed Changbin back against the wall, hard enough to knock the air out of his lungs, then suddenly let go of him and disappeared with his friends, faster than Changbin could catch his breath from the spot he’d crumpled to on the floor.

He closed his eyes, his lungs struggling to take in enough oxygen after the rough treatment, and rested his head back against the wall.

He was so very tired of this shit. So, so tired. Behind his closed lids, his eyes burned with tears he didn’t know why he was holding back. He really just wanted all of this to stop.

“You’re an idiot if you think they’ll stop with this if you go back to them.” A deep voice sounded somewhere above him, and anger filled Changbin. He opened his eyes and found himself glaring at none other than Felix, who must have witnessed the scene. He found he didn’t care it was him, of all people, like he probably would have any other day. Like that, Felix was practically asking to become an outlet for his pent-up anger.

“Yeah? What am I supposed to do instead? Fight them? Because that went pretty well last time, didn’t it? Leave this place? I’d love to, but sadly, that’s not up to me. Lie down for them and just die? I’d like to not count that as an option, thank you very much. If you have any better ideas, be my fucking guest!” He spat once he managed to get to his feet again, brushing past the white wolf as soon as he was done.

His throat closed up for real now, the tears stinging his eyes no longer staying behind the dam Changbin wished to keep them behind, flowing freely down his face as he rushed to his room.

He didn’t notice the shocked expression on Felix’s face as he watched him storm off.

 


	5. Chapter 5 - First Steps

Chapter 5

Felix was quite honestly shocked by the other kid’s words, as well as the glare he had aimed at him. He would even say it had been intimidating, in a way, even if the other was smaller than him, hunched over and quite obviously in a bad state with barely held-back tears.

His words, though, felt like an outright slap in the face to him. A slap that stung long after the other had disappeared from his view, and in a way, he had to admit, it felt deserved.

He didn’t know what he had been trying to achieve when he’d approached the other, or with his words. He wasn’t sure why he’d done or said what he did, at all. Somehow, he’d just felt compelled to approach him when he’d seen him crumple to the floor, his words weren’t thought out at all.

Pensively, he made his way back to his pack’s room, mulling over the words the other had hurled at him in response, letting them sink in, even if every single one of them burned.

Still lost in thought, he entered the dorm, letting the door fall shut behind him and not really looking where he was going as his feet carried him further. He almost ran into Chan, sending both of them stumbling.

“Hey, Fe- Wow, what’s wrong?” The alpha quickly caught up on the other’s mood, but Felix wasn’t in the mood to talk.

“The whole wolf eats wolf mentality, for starters.” He mumbled in answer, pushing Chan aside to get to his room.

Chan stared after him as the door closed behind the younger alpha, gaping.

“What the hell was that about?” He muttered under his breath, when an arm circled around his shoulders comfortingly.

“He had a run-in with Changbin.”

Chan turned to face Woojin, who the arm around his shoulders belonged to.

“Changbin?”

“The kid that saved Jeonginnie.”

Recognition flit over Chan’s face, but it didn’t erase the confusion.

“And what about it?”

Woojin shrugged, sighing softly as he dropped his arm from around his mate’s shoulders and went to sit on the nearby couch.

“Felix told him it would be stupid to join his old pack again, and Changbin snapped at him, basically asking him if he had a better idea… with a few more words than that. Something about the exchange didn’t sit well with Felix. He wasn’t even looking where he went on his way back here.”

Chan frowned.

“That Changbin kid can’t seriously be considering joining that pack again, can he?”

Woojin shook his head softly.

“I don’t think he wants to. But they aren’t going to give him a choice if he wants to live. He won’t make it much longer alone out there…”

Chan grimaced at that, sitting down beside his mate.

“Have you thought about taking him in? He’s stood up for two of ours, already, after all…” Woojin asked softly, letting Chan lean against him and eventually lie down with his head in his lap.

Chan sighed deeply once he got settled.

“I have. But we can’t. Half of our pack would be against it… And we agreed to only take in Felix’s and Jeongin’s mates from now on, when they find them. No one else…”

Woojin’s face remained impassive, but Chan could tell the older didn’t agree by the slight tensing of the corners of his lips, even if it wasn’t apparent in any other way, not even the way Woojin carded his fingers through his hair, untangling the slightly messy curls.

“I know that was what we agreed on… But sometimes, you have to eat yesterday’s words to do what’s right today. Even if what’s right isn’t always apparent to everyone at first.”

Chan hummed, but shook his head.

“But how do you know if taking the kid in is the right thing to do?”

“Is leaving him to die the right thing, then?”

Chan winced. Of course, it wasn’t.

“Of course not. But it’s not our responsibility, either. It’s the Academy’s, first and foremost.”

Woojin huffed, clearly not pleased, but still didn’t stop his play with Chan’s hair.

“You know they won’t do shit to help him. I’m surprised they even let him change dorms when he came back… The most they’ll do is expel whoever lands the final blow that kills Changbin. If even that much.”

Chan knew it was true, and he didn’t argue back. Woojin’s arguments were right, and yet… He had to think further than just a few days from now. They were a pack, a family, meant to stick together. For life, ideally. Now it was all fun and games, still, but once they were out of here, it would be his responsibility to see them all through life. It would be hard enough already for him as their pack-alpha to provide for the eight of them; ten eventually, counting Felix’ and Jeongin’s future mates. He couldn’t afford to go around taking in more and more members, as much as it went against his guts to ignore the suffering of the other kid. 

***

Felix had leaned his back against the door of his room after entering it, not moving further. He could still hear every word that was being spoken between the leading mates. If he’d ever, just for the slightest moment, thought that Changbin’s words earlier might have been overdramatic, that doubt would have vanished as soon as Woojin confirmed what would eventually be Changbin’s fate. Woojin wouldn’t exaggerate. And since Chan didn’t contradict him, either, in that aspect, Felix knew it was basically a given fact. A fact he wouldn’t accept. _Couldn’t_ accept.

If his pack wasn’t going to do anything to help Changbin, to _save_ Changbin, it would be up to him, alone, to come up with something. He wouldn’t stand by and watch him get bullied to death by those hoodlums. He didn’t know what he was going to do yet, but he would do something. Anything. And he’d start with letting Changbin know of his decision.

Quietly, so not even his pack with their sharp hearing would hear him, he slipped out of his room, and out of the dorm. A few days ago, he’d found out the location of Changbin’s new dorm by accident, surprised to find it wasn’t that far from theirs. Now, that came in handy as he was there relatively quickly, knocking on the door before he could change his mind. Not that he really thought he would change his mind in the first place.

It was one of the nymphs that answered the door, expression souring as he recognized Felix.

“What do you want?”

“Is Changbin in?”

The nymph frowned, blocking the door.

“Listen, we want no part in your wolf businesses-…”

“I just need to talk to him. No business that’s going to get anyone in trouble. Promise.” Felix interrupted, and the other’s frown intensified.

“You make a mess on our doorstep, wolf, and I promise you, I know enough witches to curse your whole pack from now on until eternity.” The nymph threatened but retreated slowly to knock on one of the doors in the hallway.

“Wolf, you got a visitor! Deal with him yourself!”

Felix frowned at the way the nymph called for Changbin. Granted, he’d only learned his name earlier from Woojin, too, but this guy shared a dorm with him! You’d think he’d at least use his name when talking to him!

His thoughts were interrupted by the room door opening and Changbin peeking out. As soon as Changbin noticed him standing in the doorway, he tensed, and Felix felt inexplicably dejected at the reaction. He hid it well, though.

Changbin stepped out of his room carefully, ignoring the nymph that disappeared in another room down the short hallway, and pulled his own door shut slowly. He was clearly stalling, before he eventually turned and approached the front door.

“What do you want?” He asked, defiant despite his behaviour.

“I thought about what happened earlier.” Felix started, and the other cocked his head, raising an eyebrow skeptically.

“Oh…?”

“And I want to help you stand up against your old pack.”

Changbin’s eyes widened incredulously, his put-up front crumbling to give way to his surprise.

“What? H-how?”

Now that was the hundred-million-dollar question, wasn’t it? Maybe Felix should have thought this through before.

“I-I-… I can teach you how to fight!”

Well, that was one option; he could do that, definitely.

Changbin seemed to doubt it, though.

“You’ll teach me how to fight? And then?”

Felix exhaled forcefully.

“And then you can fight back and stand up to them. None of them are good fighters in the first place, you will stand a chance against them that way.”

Changbin huffed.

“Let me rephrase: you’ll teach _me¸_ the person currently standing in front of you, who scarcely reaches over your chin -and, mind you, you’re not the tallest, either- how to fight. Me, who maybe weights half as much as the smallest member of that pack, and that only after a considerably huge dinner. What good do you think that will do?”

Felix shook his head.

“It doesn’t matter how strong you are if you have no technique. It also doesn’t matter how-… not-strong you are, if you know how to use your opponent’s strength against them.”

Changbin thought back to the way the kid from the library had defended against the brute from his old pack back then.

“Like that pack-mate of yours when my old pack had him and another one cornered in that classroom?”

Felix grimaced, and Changbin thought for a moment that reminding Felix of that day might not have been the smartest idea.

“Seungmin is a bad example. He used to never pay attention when we tried to teach him how to defend himself. Him and Hyunjin should never have been overpowered as easily as they were back then, and they wouldn’t have been if Hyunjin hadn’t been sick with a fever and not thinking straight.”

Easily?! Changbin gaped slightly. If the way that Seungmin had been overpowered was easy, then he had a seriously different definition of easy than Felix.

“If you would pay attention to what I would teach you, if you agree, then you won’t have to quietly put up with their harassment anymore.”

Changbin found himself seriously considering the offer suddenly.

“What about the new rule that any fighting between wolves will lead to packs being banned, though?”

“Seriously? That’s what you are going to worry about?” To be honest, it wasn’t just Felix who thought ‘what the hell’ in that moment. Changbin shrugged, though.

“Not really. But _you_ should. If I fight my old pack and it reaches the headmaster’s ears, your pack will be in trouble, too.”

Felix shook his head in disbelief, then shrugged.

“Our bond isn’t something that can be banned. We’ll handle it. You should worry about keeping yourself safe.”

Felix was right, Changbin had to admit that. He really should worry about saving his own hide more. And contrary to what his old pack believed, he did recognize a chance when it presented itself to him -at least, when it was a real one.

“Alright then. And how are we supposed to go about it, then?”

Felix gaped at him, as if he’d not really expected Changbin to agree to let him help him, and for a moment, Changbin’s hopes crumbled. Then, Felix beamed, though.

“I’m not a hundred percent sure yet, but I’ll come up with something. I’ll come find you when I have a plan!”

***

Felix had a plan the next day, and he ended up knocking on the door to Changbin’s dorm again at about the same time as the day before. The same nymph opened the door, giving him a hostile glare before turning around, ready to disappear in his own room again.

“Wolf! Visitors!”

Changbin appeared in his own door, peeking out cautiously until he recognized Felix and stepped into the hallway.

“So?”

“I know a room we can use. We can start right now, if you want.”

Changbin’s eyes widened at that.

“Right now?”

Felix nodded, and Changbin spluttered for a second, then collected himself.

“O-ok. I just need-… Keys. Ok. Uh-…” he darted into his room and came back not two seconds later, holding his keys. Felix stepped aside to let him exit the dorm.

“This way.” He announced, starting to lead the way, and Changbin followed him to a classroom. He was about to ask if that was really the room he meant, since he knew for a fact this room was used daily for classes, but Felix didn’t stop, leading him to a door at the back end of the classroom. It was unlocked, and behind it lay a room without windows. A storage room for art pieces and supplies, which looked like no one ever came in to it. In the middle, a large area had been cleared, and he had to admit it could prove to be rather perfect for what they had in mind.

“No one ever comes in here and it won’t show if the lights are on in here at night…”

Changbin nodded, trying to shake some tension out of his shoulders.

“Ok. Good. So… and now?”

Felix bit his lip, looking around.

“Uhm, now… well, you won’t usually get the chance to do that when you’re really in a situation you’ll have to fight in, but since we’re practicing there is no point risking getting hurt, so, lets stretch first of all. I’ll show you how, just copy what I’m doing.”

Changbin hadn’t expected to start like this right away, but he quickly tried to copy Felix stance and movements. It didn’t take long before Felix shook his head, abandoning his stance to approach Changbin.

“Hold on, wait, let me show you. Uh-…” He raised his hands, stopping short of touching Changbin and giving him a questioning look.

Changbin blinked, confused.

“Huh?”

“Can I touch you? To show you how to position your arms?”

“O-oh. Yeah, sure.” Changbin felt as if he’d been elbowed in the solar plexus again, only this time without having been actually touched, and minus the pain. It was somewhat of a heroic feat that he managed to keep breathing around his heart beating frantically in his throat once Felix took hold of his arms, raising them in front of him.

“So, you stretch this one out this way, and pull it close with this one… like this. Perfect. Now switch.”

Changbin bit the insides of his cheek to keep his expression schooled as Felix smiled brightly at him, then moved on to demonstrate how to stretch his sides. He tried hard to copy him the right way, he didn’t think he’d survive it if Felix touched his torso to show him how to move, and even less when they moved on to stretch their legs.

Soon enough they were done with stretching, but Changbin already felt somewhat winded from that little exercise alone. Felix didn’t comment on it.

“Alright. Now… What’s the most common way you get attacked?”

Changbin didn’t have to think too hard about that.

“Elbows to the ribs.”

Felix grimaced, his expression darkening.

“Assholes.”

It felt unexpectedly good to hear Felix curse on his behalf.

“Ok… You can only avoid those when you see them coming. So, let’s pretend I’m going to come in to elbow you as I walk past, to see what you can do to avoid me. Stand here, arms at your side…”

Changbin let Felix direct him into a spot, standing exactly like he left him.

Felix took a few steps back, then walked towards him, brushing close past him, and Changbin braced for the impact of an elbow, but Felix only brushed his ribs slightly. Then, he stopped, taking one step back and repeating the motion.

“Alright… Since I’d come in like this-… My elbow would hit you around here… Is this where they usually hit you?” He delimited an area on Changbin’s ribcage with his hand, and Changbin felt goosebumps rise under his shirt from the touch.

“Y-yeah.”

Felix hummed.

“So, to avoid that… Are you opposed to returning the courtesy?”

“Huh?” Changbin felt _so_ intelligent, with how often he made that noise that night. Felix didn’t judge him, nor did he lose his patience.

“Are you ok with elbowing them back, or would you rather just block any hits coming your way?”

Changbin wasn’t exactly fond of inflicting pain on anyone, but damn him if the fuckers didn’t deserve a bit of their own medicine…

“Not opposed… But it would probably not always be the smartest thing to do, would it?”

“True. Ok, so, if you can’t move out of the way, to block, you do _this-…._ ”

And he proceeded to show Changbin in detail. Felix moved slowly to give Changbin time to react the first couple of times, until Changbin felt confident and they picked up the tempo.

“Alright. I’m coming in with the purpose to hurt you now, ok? Just keep doing what you’ve been doing, and you’ll be fine.”

Changbin nodded, jaw set in determination as Felix retreated a few steps again. This time when he moved to elbow Changbin, there was considerably more force behind the move, but the blocking move Felix had taught him worked, and Changbin stayed unharmed. Still, Changbin gasped, causing Felix to turn around sharply, worry written all over his face as he meant to check if he’d actually hurt the other.

Changbin broke out an excited smile, though, dissipating Felix’s worry instantly.

“It worked!”

Felix smiled in return, slightly breathless.

“Yeah.”

“Do that again!”

Felix rose an eyebrow at that but retreated once more.

“Ready?”

Changbin nodded, and Felix moved to elbow him again. Again, Changbin was able to block the attack, though.

An excited, short laugh tumbled past Changbin’s lips. He almost couldn’t believe it actually worked!

In a spur of the moment, without thinking about it, he turned and hugged Felix quickly.

Felix squawked in surprise, only just stopping himself from blocking Changbin and throwing him off as an automatic reaction. Changbin let go of him only a blink of an eye later, clearing his throat and putting more distance between them.

Felix found himself not minding the hug after all. Not one bit. Still, the silence suddenly felt awkward, and he cleared his throat, too.

“Well, now that you got that down… What’s another move they pull on you often? Let’s focus on keeping you whole for now in your every day life, and then we’ll move on to blocking and dodging open attacks, and after that to attacks of your own, ok?”

Changbin nodded hastily, thinking about what other attacks he suffered frequently under.

“There’s this-... almost like a hugging move? Like-…” He struggled to find a way to describe it, and Felix clearly didn’t know what he meant.

“Show me.” He prompted, standing how he’d shown Changbin to stand earlier.

“O-on you?”

“Yeah. Attack me like they would you. But, try not to knock me out, of course.”

Changbin nodded but hesitated nonetheless.

“Go on. I’m not made of porcelain, I can take it even if you are a little rough.” Felix reassured, and Changbin swallowed nervously, but finally moved to show Felix the move he meant.

After just a short moment of thinking, Felix had the solution to block that attack, too, and proceeded to show Changbin.

Time passed without either of them really noticing, until Changbin was visibly panting, and Felix thought to check his watch.

“Holy shit! It’s getting late. We should stop here for today!”

He turned his wrist to let Changbin see the time, and Changbin’s eyes widened.

“Wow! I had no idea…!”

“Me neither. Let’s go now!”

Changbin nodded, picking up the sweater he’d discarded sometime in the meantime and went to follow Felix out of the room. They stood in the dark classroom, peeking into the deserted hallway outside, when Felix made a decision.

“You go first. I’ll follow and make sure you get to your room alright.”

Changbin wanted to protest that he didn’t need a bodyguard, but a) he could actually use one, and b) the fact that Felix cared and offered was enough that he’d rather bite his own tongue off than protest against that.

He went to slip out of the room past Felix, but the other grabbed his sleeve, stopping him.

“Tomorrow, same time, same place?”

Changbin looked down at his arm where Felix hand lay and Felix dropped it. That was not the reaction Changbin had meant to cause but he wasn’t going to say anything about it.

“Yeah… We meet here?”

Felix nodded.

“Ok. See you tomorrow, then.”

Felix nodded again, and Changbin slipped out of the room. Felix stayed true to his word, making sure Changbin got back to his room safely, before heading to his own dorm.

He kind of forgot to be quiet as he came in, alerting the older pack members that were still lounging in the common area that he’d returned.

“Felix? I didn’t notice you’d left! What were you up to?” Woojin questioned as soon as he stepped into the light, causing the other two’s eyes to turn to him, too.

Felix bit his lips. He couldn’t really tell them what he’d been doing.

“I… Was pissed earlier and had to go do something to calm down. And that’s what I did. Sorry, kinda forgot the time over it.”

He couldn’t exactly lie to his pack without them smelling it, so he told them the truth. Just a little… incomplete.

“Hmm… Did it work?”

“Yeah.”

Woojin smiled softly at him, and Felix felt a weight lift off his chest.

“I’m glad. You should go ahead and get some sleep, you have classes early tomorrow.”

Felix only nodded, hurrying past them and to his room, then past them again to shower before bed. It wouldn’t do for him to walk around smelling like Changbin where they could pick up on it for long, not if he wanted to keep their training sessions a secret. Thankfully, his hyungs weren’t of the naturally suspicious kind, not when it came to him.


	6. Chapter 6 - Closer

Chapter 6

Changbin exhaled slowly, covertly rubbing at the smarting spot on his ribs as his former packmates continued down the hallway, high-fiving each other. He bit his lip, jaw set and eyes glaring after them as they kept walking. Little did they know that they’d only managed to get a hit in because he _let_ them at this point. He could have easily deflected the hit. He did, a little, too. But after defending himself successfully the first two days after starting his training with Felix, he’d noticed them getting suspicious and frustrated, and he wasn’t ready to get cornered again. So, he decided to take a few hits in favour of not getting beaten to a pulp again.

From the opposite side of the hallway, a little further down, he caught Felix’ concerned and confused gaze, and shook his head quietly. Felix held his gaze for a second longer before averting it and continuing on to his next class.

They had decided not to show that they knew each other, or associated in any way, outside of their training sessions. Changbin didn’t want to get Felix in trouble with his pack for doing him a favour, and while Felix seemed hesitant to agree to that arrangement at first, he quickly understood the reasoning. He was pretty sure that Chan wouldn’t be exactly pleased with him going behind his back and against his orders.

As soon as Changbin stepped into the storage room they used to practice that night, Felix was up and close to him.

“What was that earlier? What did those scumbags do, how did they manage to hurt you? Are you ok?”

Changbin stumbled back a step, surprised at the welcome.

“I-I’m ok. Don’t worry. I let him get the hit in.”

Felix’s eyes widened in shock.

“Why would you do that?!”

Changbin exhaled softly, stepping past Felix into the room to finally close the door behind him.

“They’ll get frustrated if I manage to dodge them for too long and will end up cornering me as a group again. I’m not ready to fight a whole group of them yet, am I?”

Felix chewed on his lip, brow creased.

“You’re not, but-… Isn’t there another way? It’s not right that you have to let them hurt you!”

Changbin waved Felix’ concern off.

“It’s alright. I might not enjoy it too much, but it’s not as bad now that my ribs are healed, at least. It hurts, but it fades quickly. I can live with it.”

Felix shook his head at that, clearly not pleased, but came to join Changbin in the middle of the room.

“I don’t like it. But ok. Stretching?”

Changbin nodded, and they started warming up. They’d been making progress over the past week and a half, and Felix had started teaching Changbin techniques on how to not just dodge, but also overpower a stronger opponent. So far, Changbin hadn’t managed to overpower Felix a single time unless Felix allowed it to happen, and it was somewhat frustrating. Changbin was willing to keep practicing, though, working hard and harder every day, even if his muscles burned from the strain the next day.

This day was no different. They kept going until both had worked up a sweat, and after Felix had managed to successfully floor Changbin for what must be the twentieth time with Changbin failing to avoid his attack, Changbin didn’t get up right away, instead remaining flat on the floor, closing his eyes as he tried to catch his breath.

“Hey, you ok?” Came Felix’ worried voice, and Changbin blinked his eyes open to be met with the sight of Felix standing next to him, leaning down to check on him. In a split second, Changbin decided to use the fact Felix’ guard was down to twist his legs between the other’s feet, tripping him and making him fall to the floor next to him.

Felix squawked in surprise, catching his fall so he didn’t hit the floor too hard.

“Hey!” he complained loudly, while Changbin chuckled, satisfied.

“Got you!”

“What the hell? I wasn’t-… I was checking up on you, we weren’t even sparring, it doesn’t count!” Felix complained, huffing, but Changbin closed his eyes again with a satisfied smirk.

“For once, I wanted to see you meet the floor up close, too, after I’ve gotten so well acquainted with it already. Let my ego have this.”

Felix huffed again, rolling onto his back next to Changbin and hitting his arm in retaliation. It didn’t even smart, not even coming close to how the so called playful hits that were dealt in his old pack hurt.

“For real, though; are you ok? Did I go too hard on you? Are your ribs ok?”

Changbin hummed in answer, feeling warmth spread in his chest at Felix concern.

“I’m ok. Just need a breather. You’re not going too hard.”

“Ok… But if I am hurting you, you let me know, ok?”

“I will, don’t worry. But it’s not like _they_ will go easy on me, ever, so don’t hold back too much, either!”

“It’s plenty enough that you have to let them hurt you, you don’t need me to add to it.”

Changbin just waved Felix’ objection off again.

“You don’t come even close to hurting me. I’m just frustrated I can’t get it right yet.”

Felix hummed, and they lay in silence for a moment, just catching their breath and letting their bodies rest for a moment.

“Can I ask you something?” Felix eventually spoke up, and Changbin hummed.

“Sure.”

“Why did you join their pack?”

Changbin had been wondering when that question would come. He was surprised it had taken that long.

“It seemed like a good idea at the time… And I didn’t even try?”

“How come?”

Changbin sighed.

“I just… There was this kid that chatted me up on the bus down here, he ended up sitting next to me. Then here, he showed me the way to the principal, how to get to my dorm room, etc. I ended up rooming with a friend of his. They took me down to the cafeteria with them, showing me around, where what classroom was, all that. And I guess talked to the alpha on my behalf? I don’t even know. Before I knew it, the alpha declared I was part of their pack.”

Felix just listened, letting Changbin talk, and Changbin found he really wanted to talk.

“It wasn’t even bad, at first, I guess. Sure, they were rowdy, but… Mostly, they kept me out of it, even stood up for me when I got involved in their fights accidentally. I-… I’d ended up letting them copy my homeworks, and guess kind of earned that privilege for that? I don’t know if anyone genuinely cared about me not getting hit, or if it was just because of the homework. But… I kind of felt like I belonged, you know? Like someone actually wanted me around and in their pack for once…”

Changbin chuckled humorlessly.

“I feel so stupid, in hindsight… There were so many things that should have been a warning for me, that should have told me to get the fuck out of there, and that was even before they cornered your friends…”

Felix hummed pensively.

“You were there, too, weren’t you?”

Changbin flinched.

“I was. I realized too late what was going on, and once I did… I didn’t want to keep watching, but also couldn’t get away? I know it makes me part of the problem, and for that I’m sorry every day, but…”

“It’s not your fault… I know that feeling, it’s like a train-wreck. You can do nothing to stop it but can’t look away, either, never mind leave…” Felix interjected when Changbin made a longer pause.

Changbin wanted to argue back but said nothing. Felix showing understanding for his situation back then was more than he could ever hope for. More than he could hope for even from himself, since his own conscience didn’t seem willing to let him off the hook that easily.

“What I don’t really understand… why didn’t you leave after that? When I passed you that day, you were the only one that didn’t smell of euphoria, but horrified.”

Changbin swallowed thickly.

“You remember that?”

“You stood out. And not just because you were half in the way, sitting on the floor.”

Changbin took a shaky breath, trying to find a way to word his reasoning that wouldn’t sound too pathetic, pointedly ignoring Felix’ words about how he stood out.

“I didn’t leave because… it was the first time I felt like I belonged somewhere, after all. I was… scared, to lose that, to be honest. Scared of ending up like… like where I am now.”

Felix stayed silent for a moment, thinking about it.

“But… what about before you came here? Didn’t you have a pack? Or family?”

Felix’ question hurt, to Changbin’s surprise. But he didn’t mind answering it, not to Felix.

“I-… Not really. I lived with my family, as a pack, I suppose. But I was never… never really a part of it? I didn’t share a bond with them. I’m… I’m the runt. And eventually, they decided they had enough of me, and kicked me out, kind of.”

Felix inhaled sharply.

“Shit… I’m sorry for asking, I didn’t think-… I didn’t think, really. I tend to do that. I’m sorry.”

Changbin shrugged.

“It’s ok.” And it was, strangely enough.

“Can I ask you something else? You don’t have to answer, and I’m sorry in advance, if it’ll make you uncomfortable…” Felix asked after a little while, but even if it would make him uncomfortable, Changbin felt he didn’t mind answering Felix’ questions.

“Go ahead.”

“This is probably stupid, too, but… what does it mean, to be the runt? I’ve heard of it before, and deduced it’s kind of something bad, but… what is it, really?”

Changbin almost laughed at that. Sometimes, Felix could be quite naïve, couldn’t he?

“A runt is… when a mother finds one of her children to be defective somehow, or not up to par with its siblings, her other children. When the child is lacking, weaker, or smaller than the rest. Often, mothers who do find themselves with a runt, they abandon them before they can fend for themselves, leave them to die, or kill them, as pups still. Mine… mine didn’t go through with it, but she left me with the mark.”

“Mark? What mark?” Changbin could tell Felix’ mouth was working faster than his brain, and he didn’t hold it against him that he asked. Instead, he sat up, turning his back to Felix. He’d already revealed so much to Felix, it didn’t matter if he showed him this, too. Grabbing the hem of his sweater and shirt in the back, he pulled, causing the collar to slip down far enough to reveal the mark high on his back, where his neck became his shoulders.

Felix inhaled sharply, and Changbin could feel the ghost of a touch against the outline.

“Shit, dude! That looks… Does it hurt? How did that- How did you get that?”

Changbin let go of his grip on his clothes, shrugging to get the collar to slide back up.

“It’s where my mother bit me to break my neck when I was a pup. Since she didn’t go through with it, it just left the typical runt mark. And no, it doesn’t hurt; It’s never hurt me as long as I can recall... Not physically, at least.”

As he turned back around to face Felix, the blonde’s jaw was set and he wore a troubled expression.

“That’s so… cruel. And stupid! I don’t-… I don’t think you lack in anything, at all!”

Changbin gave him an incredulous look. What did he mean? Weren’t they on the floor right now in this very moment precisely _because_ he lacked and couldn’t defend himself properly?

“You can’t be serious. Just look at me, I’m the definition of lacking! Small, thin, weak…” He scoffed, but Felix shook his head.

“That doesn’t mean anything. Being strong physically is only one of many strengths. Few people are strong physically, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be strong in other ways. Being smart is also a strength, as is being caring, or artistically gifted. Being built like a fighter and packing nasty punches is one thing, but having all those other strengths, like you do, is worth so much more!”

Changbin felt his throat close up at those words and the sincerity burning behind them and in Felix’ eyes. The last thing he needed right now was to break into tears in front of Felix, though, so he turned away from him and got up instead, deciding to change the subject altogether.

“We should get back to training…” He muttered, only just loud enough for Felix to hear.

Felix hesitated a moment longer before getting up, brow knit as if he wanted to object, but eventually decided against it.

“Alright. Want to go over the move slowly again first?”

Changbin nodded, and they dove back in where they had left off earlier.

***

Eventually, Changbin got the hang of the technique, and through sheer endless practice, managed to apply the different defenses and counter-attacks Felix taught him. Between the strain of practice, letting his old pack-mates get some hits in in the hallways to keep them satisfied and otherwise at bay and still failing to dodge all of Felix attacks as they moved on to spar as if in real fight situation, Changbin thought his body would never not ache ever again. He powered through the pain, though, letting it serve as motivation to become better rather than deter him.

And eventually, it worked out. He managed to block and defend from all of Felix’ attacks, bypassing Felix’ defense and sending him sprawling helplessly himself, and that even though Felix wasn’t holding back.

As soon as Felix landed in a heap on the floor with a dull thud, grunting at the impact, Changbin’s one-second-long celebration of finally getting it right died like a candle in the wind.

“Shit, Felix! Are you alright? I’m so sorry-…!” He rushed to the other’s side, but when Felix looked up at him, he was sporting a wide grin.

“You did it! You handed me my ass, all on your own!”

Changbin stared at Felix, gaping and incomprehensive for a moment.

“Changbin! You just outsmarted every single one of my moves and won!”

Changbin snapped his mouth shut, blinking rapidly.

“I-… I won.”

“You did!” Felix beamed, lurching forward to hug Changbin tight for a moment. When he pulled back again, he still kept a hold on Changbin’s shoulders.

“You’re doing so well! I’m so proud of you!”

Changbin finally felt joy bloom in his chest again, joy over finally getting it right, finally managing to get the upper hand in a fight with Felix, and over the pride that was shining out of Felix’ voice as clear as day.

“You-… You’re not hurt, are you?” He still had to make sure, the thought of actually hurting Felix left him nauseous.

Felix shook his head, though.

“No. My ass will probably bruise a little, later, but that’s totally worth it! Shall we go again?”

Changbin shook his head, laughing.

“Eager to get your ass handed to you again?” He struck a hero pose, flexing his biceps exaggeratedly.

“Oooh, look who’s getting cocky!”

“The days where I let a brat like you beat me up are officially over!”

Felix snorted at that, laughing.

“Brat? Who’s a brat?! Watch how you talk to your elders, you…!”

Changbin joined his laughter.

“The same goes for you, brat! I’m older than you!”

Felix froze.

“You are? Aren’t we the same age? I thought, since we share classes…”

Changbin shook his head.

“I lost a year because my mother didn’t think I was ready to start school yet when I reached the age most start at. I’m a year older!”

Felix paled.

“Wow. I’m sorry, hyung, I should have-…”

Changbin waved him off.

“Don’t worry, it’s ok.”

“Can I call you hyung, though?”

“If you want to.”

Felix nodded, then smiled again.

“Ok. Cool. Alright. Well, show me what you’ve got, _hyung_!”

Changbin rolled his eyes at the exaggerated way Felix pronounced the word but smiled determinedly as he dropped into his fighting stance, ready for Felix to come at him.

***

Despite Changbin’s progress, Felix and him continued meeting up every night to spar at least for a while, improving Changbin’s technique and going through more new and more complex moves and maneuvers. A lot of the time spent in that storage room, they spent simply talking, too, though. About their days, their classes, sometimes Changbin helped Felix with his homework and explained things the younger didn’t get in class. But they also talked about themselves, getting to know each other better. Felix learned more about Changbin’s past, even if Changbin left out a lot of details since Felix tended to get mad on his behalf a lot. Changbin knew he wasn’t mad at him, but he didn’t like seeing Felix upset for any reason, so he made sure not to reveal too much that got Felix worked up.

In turn, Felix told him about himself. About how he’d found himself left behind by his birth pack when his alpha traits had started to get out of hand, how Chan had found him and convinced him to enroll in this school with him and join his pack, and had essentially tamed him. He spent a lot of time complaining about Chan, but Changbin wasn’t fooled for a single second, understanding without Felix ever telling him how much the other loved and respected his pack-alpha. Even if he tended to sometimes not follow his orders and go behind his back, when he truly didn’t believe Chan’s decision to be the best.

Deep inside, Changbin was jealous of the bond that Felix shared with his pack, but he never let him suspect that. Felix must have sensed it, though, since he eventually tried to avoid topics involving his pack when talking to Changbin. It was a big part of his life, though, so it wasn’t always possible.

Changbin didn’t mind him talking about the pack, even if he was jealous. More than that, he was glad Felix had that bond and those people that meant so much in his life.

Through it all, they got closer. Of course, for numerous reasons, they still only kept their friendship confined to the space between the four windowless walls of the art storage room, but there it thrived. There were days they didn’t spar at all, eventually, coming together just to spend time together, to talk, to do their homework or revise, or to vent their frustrations at the other.

The latter happened usually after a failed attempt at sparring in the beginning, and it was almost always Felix who ended up being the one venting.

The way that dynamic had developed was how Changbin picked up quickly that something was on Felix’ mind when he managed to break through his defenses way too easily on that particular evening, too. As he was about to send Felix sprawling to the ground for about the fourth time in less than ten minutes, he caught him instead of letting him topple over, lowering them both to sit on the floor.

“You’re not here with your head. Wanna share what’s bothering you?” He prompted gently, and Felix knew denying it would be in vain.

With a frustrated sigh, Felix rubbed at his face, getting more comfortable where he was sitting next to Changbin, eventually leaning over to rest his head against Changbin’s shoulder.

“Is it that obvious?”

Changbin hummed.

“I’m not skilled enough to take you on that easily on a normal day yet. Considering I’m basically beating your ass up while barely making an effort, yeah.”

Felix sighed, sagging more against Changbin’s side.

“I’m… I don’t know. You’ve noticed your old pack has been getting restless, haven’t you?”

Changbin flinched slightly at that, still feeling the soreness in his elbows, hands and knees from where he’d hit the floor hard that morning when he’d underestimated the force with which two of his old packmates were throwing him.

“They’ve been getting meaner again, yeah…”

“They’ve been going out of their way to try to get Seungmin and Jeongin on their own again, and even tried making a move on Jisung and Minho earlier. Nothing happened, thankfully, but they are getting more reckless again. I’m worried they’ll up their efforts to come after you, too.”

Changbin bit his lip, keeping to himself that they already were.

“What happened to your confidence that I would be able to stand my ground against them now?” He asked instead, teasing, hoping to dispel some of Felix’ worries.

Felix shook his head, shoving him slightly.

“I am still confident you can, against a reasonable number, and for a reasonable amount of time! It’s just…”

Changbin waited for a while but Felix didn’t continue.

“It’s just…?” He prompted, then.

“You won’t last forever against them. Not without backup.”

Changbin was aware of that.

“That’s why I’m avoiding lonely areas and making sure to stay where there are lots of people, in hopes that someone is going to alert some faculty before it all goes to shit.”

Felix shook his head again.

“I know, but it’s not good enough for me. I want to keep you safe myself.”

Changbin’s heart leapt in his chest, and he had to pinch himself to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. Had Felix really just said that?

“But I think Chan is getting suspicious because I spend so much time not with the pack. I can feel it, in the way he watches me when I’m around him, mostly, but sometimes through his questions, too. I’m sure he knows that I’m spending my time away from the pack with someone, even if I doubt he knows it’s you.”

Changbin hummed, shrugging lightly, just enough to jostle Felix’ head a little where it was leaned against his shoulder.

“He must pick up my smell on you when you go back, especially when you practically cuddle up to me like this.”

Felix grumbled, sitting up to meet Changbin’s gaze.

“Are you complaining?”

Changbin shook his head, maybe a little too hastily.

“Most certainly not!”

A small smile tugged on Felix’ lips for a moment, and then he shifted to lie down on the floor with his head resting on Changbin’s thighs.

“I don’t mind smelling like you. In fact, I mind having to hide it and wash it off as soon as I get back to my dorm. It sucks. You smell good.”

Changbin gaped at the boy in his lap, incredulous, with his ears turning flaming red.

“Felix…!”

Said boy merely shrugged.

“What? It’s the truth.”

Changbin’s ears turned redder, and he shook his head, avoiding Felix gaze.

Felix’ small smile returned, and he lifted a hand to poke Changbin’s cheek.

“You’re cute when you’re flustered.”

Changbin huffed, glaring down at Felix.

“Is that why you’re trying to fluster me?”

Felix shook his head, serious again.

“No. I’m not trying to fluster you on purpose. This is just a nice by-product of telling you how I feel.”

Changbin was pretty sure his heart would give out eventually from how arrhythmically it was beating. Surely this kind of flutter was not how a healthy heart should beat.

“I wish we didn’t have to hide that we like each other… Especially from my pack. I wish they would accept that I want to spend time with you, to help you learn to defend yourself, but just like this, too. And that they would allow me to protect you.” Felix continued, his voice almost small.

Changbin bit his lip, a foreign ache spreading in his chest.

“Felix… You know why we can’t, though. I’m not part of your pack. And your pack has good reason to not like me…”

Felix huffed.

“They don’t even know you!”

Changbin shook his head, without thinking starting to run his fingers through Felix hair, trying to soothe him.

“They know enough, and that’s ok. And I don’t want you to get in trouble because of me, either. Not with your pack, not with my old pack, and not with the school. You’ve already done so much for me, but you should never do anything to jeopardize your own safety and well-being because of me. If you did, your pack would only have more reason to not like me.”

Felix wanted to protest but didn’t know how. He settled for a disgruntled whine before turning to hide his face against Changbin’s stomach, while Changbin continued playing with his hair as they sat in silence from then on. Changbin eventually suspected Felix had fallen asleep, but just as the thought crossed his mind the younger stirred and rolled back onto his back before sitting up.

“Chan is looking for me. I should head back…”

Changbin’s heart felt like it dropped, but he nodded softly.

“You should. Don’t worry him.”

Felix stood and offered a hand to Changbin, helping him up. As soon as he was standing on his own feet, Felix closed the space between them and hugged Changbin tightly.

Changbin’s breath hitched as the hug lasted, unlike the usual short ones they had sometimes shared before. It lasted long enough for him to realize how perfectly he fit against Felix and into his embrace, and he found he quite liked fitting against him like that. He felt right at home there, especially when Felix nuzzled his face against the side of his head, his breath hitting the shell of Changbin’s ear.

“You really smell nice…” He sighed softly.

Changbin closed his eyes, biting his lip to keep his reply to himself. Because so did Felix, his scent was practically intoxicating, especially when he was wrapped up in it like this, and he never wanted to not be surrounded by it.

It couldn’t last, though, and he eventually stepped back, Felix letting go of him reluctantly.

“You should go. Don’t get in trouble with your alpha.”

Felix nodded grimly, stepping towards the door, which he held open for Changbin to pass first. It didn’t matter if Chan was looking for him, he would at least see Changbin safely back to his dorm if he couldn’t spend more time with him tonight.


	7. Chapter 7 - Bonded

Chapter 7

Felix hurried back towards his own dorm after Changbin’s door closed behind him and ended up almost barreling into Chan as he rounded the last corner. Chan barely caught him, probably having sensed him at the last moment, making sure they didn’t fall.

“Whoa there! Careful! Why are you running?”

Felix took a step back as soon as he caught his balance, facing his alpha.

“You were looking for me…”

Chan frowned slightly but nodded.

“I was. We had agreed to all spend the evening together, have some proper bonding time tonight. Did you forget?”

Felix bit his lip. Shit. He did forget, indeed.

“I’m sorry. It slipped my mind.”

Chan’s eyes narrowed slightly.

“Felix-…”

“I know, I know. I’m sorry. Really.”

Chan sighed, rubbing a hand down his face, before facing Felix with a serious look. The look alone let Felix know he was in trouble, and he automatically shrunk a little, before Chan could even say anything.

“Look, Felix, I haven’t said anything before because of course there is nothing wrong with you making friends outside the pack and you don’t need to tell any of us everything, you are allowed a life of your own. But lately… It’s like we barely ever see you in the dorms anymore. If it’s not for the short times between classes, you completely avoid us. Is there something that is wrong? Something that is driving you away from the pack?”

Felix paled a little.

“W-what? No! No, there’s nothing wrong with the pack, or anyone in it! I love you, I love all of you, and I don’t have any problems with any of you! It’s- no one is at fault that I’m spending less time with all of you, I promise!”

Chan gave him a doubtful look.

“No one?” He inhaled deeply through his nose, pointedly, and Felix, only just having paled, suddenly worked up a blush.

“Ah-… well. I wouldn’t call it fault.”

Chan tried to hold his gaze, but Felix kept avoiding it. Eventually, Chan gave up with another deep sigh.

“If you don’t want to tell me, that’s ok, I guess. I don’t have to know everything. But please… Make sure not to miss out on the few times we specifically call for pack-time because of whoever it is. You know bonding time is precious and important. And I’m not going to sugar-coat it, especially Jeongin and Jisung are really upset you forgot. They are taking your continuous absence the hardest, and you forgetting about tonight was pretty much the last straw. They are worried you are thinking about leaving the pack.”

Felix gasped at that.

“I’m not! I’m not thinking about leaving, I swear! It hasn’t even crossed my mind! Chan, hyung, you have to believe me! This- this is not about that. I love you all too much to want to leave the pack!”

Chan might have said it were Jeongin and Jisung who were worried that Felix was considering leaving, but he would be lying if he said the thought hadn’t crossed his own mind, too, and that it didn’t pain him.

“Maybe you should tell them that yourself, you know…” He kept his voice low, trying to hide how relieved he was about Felix’ vehement denial.

Felix nodded hastily, his heart heavy as he trotted after Chan towards their dorm. He hadn’t even considered that his pack might be missing him when he snuck out every evening to meet up with Changbin instead. And how could he forget about the pack bonding time tonight? That was really stupid and inconsiderate of him! He had some wrongs to make right again.

***

Felix felt bad about it, but he eventually ended up telling Changbin they couldn’t meet up that night, or possibly for a few nights, during the following day. His talk with the other pack members the evening before hadn’t been particularly long or grueling, but he felt sufficiently bad for worrying them and wanted to make up for it by spending some more time with them, especially to reassure Jeongin and Jisung.

He enjoyed spending time with the pack, too, it wasn’t like it was a chore, since he really loved the other members. It wasn’t just something he threw around without meaning it. But if he was honest with himself, he felt somehow off during those evenings he spent solely with them. It was like something was missing. A small niggling feeling in the back of his mind and the far back corner of his heart that told him something wasn’t like it should be.

He tried to ignore it, and sometimes it worked, for a little while. But especially when it got late and they all bid each other good night and retreated to their rooms, Felix felt like something bigger was missing, something was out of place. He could never really pinpoint it, though.

Over the following few days, the feeling grew, not solely restricted to the evenings spent with the pack but expanding to linger throughout the whole day. And by the looks he sometimes caught out of the corners of his eyes, it was obvious his pack caught up on the fact something was bothering him. Still, no one asked, and he was grateful for it, because he had no idea what he should answer if they ever did ask him why he was spacing out, unfocused, and where that feeling of loneliness he felt deep inside and that leaked into the pack bond came from.

It was another lunch break he spent in the company of the whole pack when he was spacing out again that a change in that feeling of loneliness deep inside happened. From one second to the next, the loneliness disappeared, replaced by fear.

Felix shook his head at himself, staring at the chicken sandwich in his hands, then looked up to search his surroundings frantically for anything that could have caused that feeling. He found nothing, though, nothing was threatening him or any of the members of his pack, they were all safe and happy right next to him.

He had barely recovered from the sudden wave of fear, when he felt it again, but this time mixed with both anger and nervousness.

Unknowingly, that wave of emotion made him get up, attracting everyone’s attention to himself.

“Felix? You alright, buddy? You look spooked.” Minho asked him first, and Felix shook his head.

“I- I don’t know. Something-… Something is wrong.”

The wave of emotions ebbed down, but they didn’t disappear. He could still feel them, right there under the surface of his own confusion. He knew there was nothing to be afraid of, in their dorm’s common area, surrounded by his pack. There was nothing angering him, nothing to make him nervous -aside from those foreign emotions he didn’t know the source of.

And then he felt it, the pain in his side, against his ribs, quickly followed by a sharp jolt of pain against his temple, followed by the flashing image of laughing people. The laughter wasn’t happy, though, despite rejoicing. It sounded mean, condescending, like a celebration of something evil.

He paled as a thought hit him, a thought he didn’t want to entertain but that he _had_ to consider.

“Oh no!” He gasped, turning to leave the dorm as quickly as possible, leave to find-

“Felix! What’s going on? Where are you going?”

That was a good question; one Felix didn’t answer. Instead, he focused on the emotions lingering between and underneath his own, because yes, he was becoming increasingly aware that that fear, nervousness, anger and pain was not his own. It was someone else’s, and that someone else was in trouble. And if that someone else was who he thought it was…

Felix quickened his steps, running for the sake of running as soon as he was out the door of his pack’s dorm, letting his gut feeling guide him to where he suspected the emotions came from without him consciously choosing the way.

As he ran, he felt the pain that wasn’t his own again, and again, in different parts of his body, and fear flashed between it.

‘Hold up, I’m almost there! You can do it. You can fight them! You are smarter than them! You are so much smarter, you are better than them! Hold on just a little longer, please!’ He thought, insistently, hoping the channel that let him feel those emotions and pain worked both ways and he could do something to help.

It didn’t take him long before he rounded a corner and skidded to a halt. The hallway was blocked by a considerable amount of people, all with their backs to him, clearly focusing on a commotion on the other side of the wall of bodies. When he heard a resounding smack followed by a pained grunt at the same time pain that wasn’t his exploded in the back of his head, quickly commented by a loud cheer from the crowd, he got a fairly good idea of what the hell was happening.

“Felix, don’t…!” Chan skidded to a halt next to him, reaching out to hold onto him by his wrist, but stopped short upon seeing Felix’ expression.

“Felix, you can’t-…”

Felix could, and he would. Nothing, not even an alpha’s command from Chan would have been able to hold him back as he shifted into his wolf form and leapt over the gathered people. He landed in a small semicircle formed by the crowd around four people. He didn’t recognize three of them, but he didn’t need to see the fourth to know who it was.

As soon as his feet made contact with the floor again he propelled himself forward once more, landing between Changbin and his closest attacker. He took the chance and the element of surprise on his side to sink his teeth into his arm and push him off, causing him to stumble back into his own ranks and give the whole lot of them an idea about the change of pace and odds about to take place.

Deafening silence filled the hallway for a moment, before outraged calls started filling it once more, and the mass of people started to move, closing in on Felix and Changbin.

Felix could hear, but simultaneously also feel the whimper that escaped Changbin’s throat upon sensing what was most likely about to happen, and it fueled a rage in him he had never felt before. The need to protect Changbin paired with the anger over what had already been done to him, including the fear inflicted on him, drove him into a calculated frenzy that left anyone who came within his reach bloodied and scrambling. It wasn’t by much that he eventually missed Chan’s throat, too, when his alpha got too close, having fought or growled his way through the mass of spectators turned aggressors.

Confronted with three wolves, two of which alphas -one pack alpha and one clearly very pissed protective one- eventually discouraged the gathered pack, despite their superiority in numbers, and they quickly scattered, seeking their luck in flight.

Changbin stood panting, stumbling back a few steps to lean against the wall for support, but as soon as the last trace of any member of the aggressive pack vanished behind the bend in the hallway, his last reserves of strength vanished, too. His legs gave out underneath him, and Felix barely had enough time to shift back into his human form to catch him before he hit the ground.

“Changbin!” His call came choked with worry as he practically wrapped himself around the older, holding him close.

“I’m fine… Don’t worry about me.” Changbin’s voice was scarcely more than a whisper, and it did nothing to reassure Felix when Changbin’s eyes rolled back and closed, followed by his body going limp in his arms.

“Changbin, no! Changbin, hyung, you have to stay awake! Come on, wake up, Changbin!!”

Despite the panic welling up in him because of Changbin suddenly fainting, Felix managed to lower him to the ground gently to quickly check his pulse and breathing as well as look for any apparent injuries. While he did all that, he completely ignored Chan, who was still standing next to him, watching the scene with complete bewilderment. He didn’t notice the rest of the pack eventually arriving, too busy focusing on Changbin in front of him and trying to rouse him, until he felt a heavy hand on his shoulder.

His gaze snapped up, every muscle in his body tensing, ready to defend Changbin from whoever he had to, but he was merely met with Woojin’s serene gaze.

“Felix, you can’t stay out here in the hallway with him. The ground is no place for him, either. Do you want to take him to the nurse?”

A soft gasp could be heard from someone in the pack, and Felix thought it might have been Hyunjin. But even without that gasp, he knew what the implications of taking Changbin to the nurse would be. There would be no way it wouldn’t get to the headmaster, and he doubted he would get a chance of being heard out.

Not that it would matter what he’d have to say, it would remain a fact that there had been another altercation between wolves, and their pack would be affected either way. And as much as he had feigned bravado in front of Changbin about how his pack couldn’t be undone, the truth was that he was scared of the repercussions, too.

In that moment, though, more than anything, he was aware of one thing.

“He needs help.”

Woojin nodded next to him.

“He does.”

“I’m not leaving him.”

“I’m not asking you to.”

Felix swallowed thickly, giving Woojin a pleading look.

“Take him to your room, for now.”

Over Woojin’s shoulder, Felix could see the frown on Chan’s face, and hear the whispers among his pack, but he didn’t get a chance to react to either.

“Go on.” Woojin urged him, returning Felix’ focus to Changbin, and got up himself to address his mate. He didn’t say anything; not with words, anyway. But after one long shared look, Chan’s frown eased up and his stance became less rigid. Felix took the fact he wasn’t stopping him as confirmation that it was ok for him to take Changbin into their dorm, and to his room.

As he walked, he was aware of the whispers of the others behind him, but he didn’t tune into them, ignoring them for the time being.

It was Seungmin who eventually sped up to walk ahead of him, opening the doors for him since he couldn’t do that himself with his arms full of Changbin.

As gently as he could, he deposited Changbin on his bed, his heart stilling when Changbin groaned as he jostled him a little too much.

“Looks like he’s just sleeping now. He must be exhausted, but I’m sure he’ll wake up soon.” Felix turned around to see Woojin leaning against the doorframe to his room, watching him but pushing himself off once his gaze met Felix’ to come join him next to the bed.

“Here, I brought you the first aid kit, in case he needs it. Once he wakes up, pay attention to make sure he doesn’t have a concussion. And if he does seem to have a concussion, if he doesn’t wake up soon, or if something seems off, do take him to the nurse, ok? Whatever happens afterwards, we’ll deal with it. Don’t worry about that, just focus on him for the time being. I’ll handle the others.”

Felix took the kit from Woojin’s hands, together with a damp towel, nodding as he swallowed drily.

“Thanks, hyung.”

Woojin gave him a warm smile.

“Call for me if you need any help, ok? I’ll be right out there.” He nodded at the door, and Felix acknowledged it with a nod of his own.

“Thank you.”

Woojin’s smile became softer and he reached out to pat Felix’s shoulder, squeezing it comfortingly.

“Anytime, Lix. I’m here for you.”

Felix swallowed thickly as Woojin left the room, leaving him alone with Changbin.

With nothing else but the boy on his bed to focus on, it took him less than a minute to start worrying about what was considered ‘soon’, and what too long for the other to wake up. He had to distract himself so he wouldn’t go mad with worry, but at the same time found it impossible to divert his attention from Changbin for more than a few seconds.

On one such attempt to distract himself, his eyes landed on the damp towel Woojin had handed him along with the first aid kit, and he wanted to smack himself for not thinking about it sooner.

With all the care in the world, he approached Changbin’s passed out form to start cleaning him of the blood that clung to his face, where his lip and brow had split, and his hands, which were the dirtiest.

He focused on his hands first, hesitant to touch his face while he was sleeping. While they had been practicing together, he had never noticed, but now, as he held Changbin’s hands in his own, he couldn’t help but notice how small they were. In fact, it wasn’t just his hands that were small, all of Changbin seemed small. Technically, he knew that, but whenever they spent time together, somehow it never stood out to him. Changbin’s whole personality, once they had gotten over the initial awkwardness, made up for it in such a way that Felix sometimes even felt small compared to him, so he never spared it a thought. Now that he was-… sleeping, according to Woojin, and hurt, it really hit Felix how small he actually was. Small, and fragile.

Felix whole body shook as something inside him seemed to snap and his first and foremost thought, or more like instinct, became that he had to protect this boy. Not just in this moment, against the other pack, but against everything. Everyone, including his own pack, and everything that could ever threaten him, in any way.

His heart ached with the force of the sudden need, his whole body tensed, and he only noticed that his grip on Changbin’s hand had tightened when the boy mumbled in his sleep, tugging in discomfort.

Felix’ grip relaxed instantly, even if he didn’t let go of Changbin’s hand. As soon as he wasn’t crushing it in his hold anymore, Changbin stopped trying to free it, though, and Felix finally set out to actually clean it. As he removed more and more of the blood and dirt clinging to his hands, he found that a lot of the blood seemed to not even belong to Changbin. Sure, his knuckles were a little bruised, and a few scratches marred the backs, but nothing that warranted the amount of blood he cleaned away.

The only conclusion Felix could come to was that it must have stemmed from the wolves that had been attacking Changbin, and pride bloomed in his chest. Changbin must have fought valiantly, more than he had been able to pick up on through the connection that they shared, not only blocking and defending himself well, but also proving himself to be a worthy opponent and making his attackers swallow some of their own medicine.

“You really fought well, didn’t you?” he whispered, barely audible, for there was no one to hear his words anyway, as he reached out to caress his face.

He swallowed thickly as his hand molded against the side of Changbin’s face. Despite the dried blood clinging to where it had trickled from the corner of his lips, his brow and a little under his nose, the bruise discoloring the area around the outside of one of his eyes and disheveled hair that stuck to his forehead with dried sweat, Changbin was beautiful. Breathtaking, even.

Felix blinked, feeling as if some kind of filter that had been obscuring his vision had been removed from in front of his eyes. How could he have missed this before? How could he have never noticed how truly mesmerizing Changbin looked, if even injuries marring his face couldn’t detract from his beauty?

He shook himself, removing his hand from Changbin’s face. He needed to get a grip on himself and stop ogling him, no matter how beautiful he was, and instead focus on removing the dried blood. If he could reach out to caress his sleeping face, he could make himself useful and clean him up. And that he did.

If it was because of any discomfort Felix might have inadvertently caused him, or just because his body decided it was time to wake up, Felix would never learn what caused Changbin to stir when he was just done cleaning his face. All he knew was that as soon as he leaned back, ready to resign himself to waiting impatiently again for Changbin to wake up, Changbin shifted on the bed, groaning quietly and rolling onto his side.

Felix bit his lip when he frowned, groggily reaching behind himself to pat around, searching for something. The blanket, Felix realized when Changbin’s hand stilled for a moment before curling around the fabric underneath him and tugging on it weakly. There was no way he could pull it up and around him, since he was laying on top of it, though.

It was a pitiful sight, but also incredibly adorable, and a small chuckle escaped Felix before he could stop it. Instantly, Changbin froze. His frown intensified and then he started blinking his eyes open. As soon as his gaze focused enough to spot Felix, confusion replaced most of his frown.

“Felix...”

Felix nodded, humming in answer, and Changbin’s gaze wandered to take in the room he was in.

“What-… Where am I?”

“My room.”

Changbin’s eyes widened.

“What? Why?”

Felix tilted his head questioningly, a frown of his own growing on his face.

“Please tell me you didn’t lose your memory again and you actually remember what happened before you passed out!”

Changbin huffed, struggling to sit up on Felix’ bed.

“I had the misfortune of running into a whole bunch of my old pack in the hallway and shit -as well as fists- went flying, until you and your pack-alpha showed up?”

Felix exhaled, relieved.

“Yeah, pretty much.”

“How long have I been out?”

Felix checked the time, surprised himself as he did the math.

“Barely twenty minutes.”

Changbin sagged in on himself a little, tension leaving his body.

“Oh, bless. For a moment I was worried I’d lost another handful of weeks!”

Felix shook his head, smiling lightly.

“You didn’t, thankfully. I think I’d have worried myself to death had that been the case.”

Changbin gave him a curious look, but then shook his head as if to set himself back on track.

“Why am I in your room? What about your pack?”

Felix flinched at that.

“Ah… I wasn’t about to leave you behind in that hallway once you’d passed out, and Woojin suggested it…”

“So, they know…?”

Felix shrugged, but it didn’t fool Changbin into believing there was any nonchalance in Felix, at all.

“Not sure… They probably figured it’s you who I’ve been spending so much time with, but probably not what we’ve been doing. Not that that matters, anyway.”

Changbin hummed, pensively, lifting a hand to scratch at the side of his face, but flinched as he made contact with the bruise there.

“You fought really well.” Felix commented, proud again as he thought about it, but Changbin looked at him doubtfully.

“I mean it.” Felix confirmed, and a small smile, full of shyness, bloomed on Changbin’s face.

“Really? How do you know?”

Felix nodded.

“Really. You wouldn’t have stood your ground as long as you did if you hadn’t. Also, your hands. There was hardly any blood of your own on them.”

Changbin’s gaze fell to his own hands, then to the towel Felix was still holding.

“You cleaned it up?”

Felix nodded, suddenly feeling shy himself.

“Yeah, I did… Sorry if that’s weird… I figured that way I’d at least be useful while trying to distract myself from going crazy, waiting for you to wake up.”

“It’s fine… Thank you. You were really worried, huh? I could practically feel it even in my sleep…”

Felix’ eyes widened in interest.

“Oh?”

It took Changbin a moment to realize what had caught Felix interest.

“You… Did you feel… How did you know I needed help back there?” He asked tentatively, trying to distract him for the moment since he wasn’t sure how to answer Felix’ question without sounding crazy.

“I felt it. I felt what you were feeling. I’m not sure how I figured out where you were, because I just focused on you and let my feet do the rest, but it worked, obviously. I tried to send you feelings of reassurance while I was on my way to you, but I don’t know if that worked.”

Changbin averted his gaze, so much that his hair falling into his face obscured Felix’ view of it, but it was in vain since Felix could _feel_ the wave of both embarrassment and giddiness coming from him without seeing the emotions displayed.

“It did work… And it really helped, I found strength I didn’t know I had for a while.” Changbin eventually admitted in a whisper.

“I am glad it worked. I could feel your pain, too, you know…”

Changbin’s head snapped up, horrified gaze meeting Felix’.

“What?!”

Felix merely nodded.

“I felt it, but at the same time knew it wasn’t my own, and it didn’t leave any damage. I don’t know if I felt all of it, or just some. I never felt any hit against the mouth, but you have a split lip, so I’m assuming I didn’t feel everything.”

Changbin shook his head, still horrified.

“Well, thank fuck for that! That’s messed up! Why would you feel my pain?!”

Felix merely shrugged.

“Not the point. My point is that I have a bit of an idea how badly you were hit, and I really, really need to know if you’re truly ok, or if I need to take you to the nurse, after all.”

Changbin gaped at him, clearly wanting to retort something, but caught himself and snapped his mouth shut.

“Changbin?”

Changbin shook his head, finally averting his gaze.

“I’m fine, don’t worry about me.”

“Those were your exact words to me before you passed out earlier. Excuse me if I don’t believe you there.”

Changbin shook his head.

“I passed out because of the stress of the situation. Or more like, the stress of the conflicting emotions of the moment, once they were gone and it was over. Not because of any injuries.”

Felix squinted at him, but Changbin shook his head.

“Trust me. I’m ok.”

“You’re not in any pain? No wounds, no bruises, no sprains? Completely fine?”

“Yes.”

Felix didn’t believe him, quickly reaching out and poking Changbin’s side, where he knew one of the stronger hits had landed. They gasped in unison, Changbin squirming away from the touch while Felix jumped, unexpectedly feeling the mirror of that pain in his own side.

“What the hell-…?” Changbin winced, sitting up again.

“Are you going to be honest with me now?”

Changbin sighed, his shoulders slumping in defeat.

“Fine. I’m sore all over. Happy now?”

Felix shook his head.

“Not at all, but thanks for stopping the lies. Woojin brought me our first aid kit, will you let me help look after your injuries?”

Changbin didn’t meet his gaze once again, but at least didn’t hide his face, giving Felix a full view of the blush spreading on his cheeks.

“I mean, I was just thinking because it might be easier for me since I can see them better, but if you don’t want my help… At least tend to them yourself as best as you can. And, you should also change into more comfortable clothes. I can lend you some.”

Changbin mulled over it a moment longer, then gave up. He did feel like shit, if he was honest with himself, and having someone help patch him up again would be a nice change of pace for once. With Felix, there wasn’t even anything he felt the need to hide anymore, since he’d already seen the mark disfiguring his back.

“Ok…”

For a second, Felix looked surprised that Changbin had actually agreed, but he caught himself quickly.

“Oh-ok. I’m… getting you some clothes. Do you want to, uh-…” How could he just go and ask him to strip?

Thankfully, he didn’t have to, as Changbin was already taking it upon himself to do just that, and Felix hastily turned away and to his dresser to get the other some clothes to change into. He stopped short just as he was about to turn back around when he felt pain shoot through his shoulders, realizing a split second later it wasn’t his own when Changbin groaned softly.

In a blink of an eye, Felix was back by his side, tapping his arm softly.

“Wait, stop, I’ll help you, ok?”

Changbin merely hummed, and Felix took the hems of Changbin’s shirt and sweater out of his hands, carefully lifting them up and off the other. As soon as he had an unimpeded view of Changbin’s torso, he winced.

“Holy shit, Changbin! How-… Are you sure you don’t have any broken ribs or something? Please, be honest!”

Changbin looked down on himself, grimacing, too.

“I’m pretty sure there aren’t any…” He inhaled deeply, and once again Felix could feel the pain Changbin felt at the action. Changbin shook his head, though, exhaling carefully.

“Sucks, but nothing like it would were they broken.”

“We have an ointment for bruises. I feel like dipping you in it from head to toe!”

Changbin chuckled at that, spreading his arms just slightly.

“Go ahead.”

Felix stopped short for a moment.

“Are you sure?”

“Do your worst.”

It took Felix a moment longer to regain motion, but when he did he scoffed.

“As if… Alright then. Legs, too?”

Changbin responded by getting rid of his pants, too. It was mostly his shins that were bruised, and Felix recognized most of the bruises as those one would sustain from paying an attacker back for their offense. Pride bloomed in his chest once again, and in reaction, Changbin gave him a questioning look. Felix nodded at his shins.

“You let them know you’re no longer an easy target well.”

Changbin hummed pensively.

“That’s why they decided to triplicate their efforts.”

“You still did well.” Felix insisted, now ready with the tube of ointment. “Seriously, though, I hope we have enough of this stuff. Should I just start from your hairline down to make sure I don’t miss a spot? Maybe get a paint-roller, to make it easier?”

Changbin groaned, fondly exasperated, and rolled his eyes.

“Shut up and just start. Your room isn’t exactly warm to sit around in almost naked.”

Felix mock saluted, moving closer as he uncapped the tube and squeezed some of the ointment out. It would take him a while to cover all of Changbin’s bruises, and he didn’t want him to get a cold on top of everything.

Felix did his utmost to focus on the bruises he was lathering, simultaneously tying to be as careful as possible to not hurt Changbin, but also not miss a single spot. Meanwhile, Changbin had nothing else to do but focus on Felix.

Truth be told, maybe he didn’t need Felix’ help taking care of his bruises, but it was such a foreign yet highly appreciated concept to have someone fuss over him like Felix did that he didn’t want to miss out on it. Besides, having Felix as close to him as he was right now did wonders to fill the void that he had felt opening up and growing more and more these past days they spent apart without meeting up at night. Finally, that restless pit of solitude quietened and seemed content for the time being.

Changbin didn’t even notice when his eyes eventually slid shut again, his focus turning to the feeling of Felix’ hands on his skin again as he slowly started drifting off.

“Hey, Changbin…” Felix called, softly.

“Hmm?”

“I get you’re tired, but you should put on some clothes before you go back to sleep. I’m almost done.”

Changbin blinked his eyes open again.

“I wasn’t about to sleep…”

Felix looked up from where he was crouching in front of him to finish tending to the bruises on his shins.

“I _felt_ how you were falling asleep, you know.”

Changbin shook his head, sighing.

“Guess there’s no way to fool you anymore, huh?”

Finishing up lathering the last bruise in the ointment, Felix shook his head before standing up to retrieve the clothes he’d picked for Changbin.

“No. Here, put these on, and then you can go back to sleep.”

Changbin complied, sinking back onto the bed with a content half-groan once Felix had lifted the blanket out of the way to then drape it over Changbin once he’d gotten settled. He was really enjoying the attention Felix lavished on him, but even more he loved the scent that enveloped him as he settled in the bed properly. It was so strongly Felix he doubted his own scent stood any chance. Not that he minded, at all.

Despite how comfortable he felt, the pain from the bruises fading thanks to the ointment and enveloped in warmth and Felix’ scent, he found sleep wouldn’t come to him. Something was amiss, plaguing his mind, just under the surface, making it hard for him to grasp what it was.

“Felix?” He eventually called out quietly.

“Hmm?” Felix looked up from where he’d been picking up Changbin’s dirty and somewhat torn clothes.

“This whole thing… you feeling what I feel, and me feeling what you do… What does that mean?”

Felix swallowed thickly, setting the clothes aside to come sit at the edge of the bed where he’d been sitting earlier, too. His hand found Changbin’s naturally, playing softly with the fingers as he thought about how to word his explanation.

“Well… I am not a hundred percent sure, but… since we can feel what the respective other is feeling, even send emotions and flashes of images and sounds… I think it’s pretty safe to say that there is some kind of bond between us.”

Changbin didn’t answer immediately, letting that information sink in, but his features were darkened by a pensive frown.

“But… how?”

“Do you know how true pack bonds are formed?” Felix asked a question in turn in lieu of explaining directly. Changbin’s frown just deepened and he shook his head, though.

“Well, aside from the claiming bond that large packs use, where an alpha can send commands to the whole pack through the bond, there are deeper ones that form naturally between individuals who are close to each other, who trust each other. Those kinds of bonds allow the individuals to share more between each other than just orders from one party. I think what we have might be something like that.”

“But I’m not part of your pack.”

“That’s why I said something like that, not that it was that. If it was like the pack bond, you’d be able to feel the others of my pack, too. But you can only feel me, right?”

Changbin nodded.

“I… I have a suspicion about what this could mean… But I’m not sure, so I don’t-… I don’t want to make assumptions before I can be sure, ok?” Felix continued, and although Changbin was curious, he didn’t press on.

“Ok… Is your assumption good or bad, though?”

Felix’s lips twitched into a warm smile.

“Good. Well, I’d say it’s good. I can only hope you’d feel the same way about it, but if it is what I think it might be, then… I don’t see why you’d not feel the same way about it.”

If anything, that left Changbin with even more questions than before, and he gave Felix a droll stare.

“Way to talk in riddles, Felix…”

Felix grimaced, but even his grimace didn’t get rid of his smile.

“Well, sorry. I’ll just… try to find a way to confirm my suspicions first, ok?”

Changbin shook his head, not in denial but in fond exasperation.

“Whatever. Sure.”

“Sorry I couldn’t reassure you enough to make it easier for you to find sleep.” Felix apologized quietly, and Changbin eyed him a little warily.

“I can feel that your mind is restless, and that’s keeping you awake.”

Changbin sighed, blushing slightly.

“Are you constantly tuned into my feelings now?”

Felix shrugged, but it was apparent he was anything but indifferent.

“You’re not blocking the bond. And the closer I am to you, the more I feel, I guess.”

“Why don’t I feel you, then? Are you blocking the bond? How does one even do that?”

Felix shook his head.

“You might be feeling me, but… You might not be able to tell apart what’s you and what’s me all the time right now. It takes practice, and since you said you’ve never had a bond before... But, I’ll teach you another time. You should rest now. You’re exhausted.”

Changbin sighed, resigned. He was tired, true. And he should rest.

He squeezed Felix hand, which was still holding his, gently.

“I’ll hold you to it… After I sleep.”

Felix’ warm smile returned, and it honestly did things to Changbin. He didn’t know if it was his own or Felix’ emotion that made him feel all tingly whenever Felix looked at him like that. He knew for sure they were his own thoughts, though, as he studied Felix’ face through half lidded eyes.

Felix was beautiful, he’d always thought that, from the moment he’d first seen him. But it wasn’t just from far away that he was mesmerizing, he was equally beautiful when he was up close, close enough that he would have been able to see any imperfection on him. Except, Felix didn’t have any imperfections. Every little feature about him only enhanced his beauty, in Changbin’s eyes.

Mesmerized as he was, he didn’t think about it as he lifted his free hand to caress the freckles adorning Felix face. Felix didn’t move away, his eyes fluttering for a second before his smile deepened.

“You’re stunning, you know that?” Changbin whispered, and Felix cocked his head slightly, leaning into Changbin’s touch.

“Am I?”

Changbin nodded.

“In looks as well as in personality. You’re so-…” He didn’t have words to describe Felix, truly. He doubted there were words to describe the feeling in his chest as he held Felix warm gaze, acutely aware of every physical connection he was sharing with him in that moment: his one hand clasped between both of Felix’, his other against Felix cheek, with Felix sitting close enough that only the blanket separated their bodies on the bed. He didn’t need the words, though, the feeling so strong and deep within him that Felix had no difficulty picking it up through the bond.

Slowly, as if it had a mind of its own, Changbin slid his hand from Felix’ cheek, down to his neck, and let it wander until he was holding on to the back of it. Felix didn’t move away, instead giving in to the guiding notion as the weight of Changbin’s hand grew heavier, pulling him closer. Their eye contact never broke, Changbin didn’t stop Felix from leaning in, and Felix never resisted Changbin, following him willingly.

They both knew what they were doing, what they were leading up to. It was as if they were thinking with one mind in that moment, and neither was surprised when their lips finally met, eyes fluttering shut to let other senses take over.

Their kiss was gentle, hesitant. Felix was acutely aware of how bruised Changbin’s lips were, so he allowed only for the gentlest of caresses between them; he didn’t want to hurt the other. Changbin didn’t instigate more, happy with the feather-light but warm caress of Felix’ lips against his own, light but present enough to leave no doubt about where Felix stood with him. And that was all he needed in that moment.

When Felix pulled back, Changbin’s eyes were closed and a content, relaxed smile adorned the lips he’d just kissed. They were addicting, and Felix couldn’t resist bending down once more, pecking them lightly one more time for good measure.

“You really should sleep now…” He murmured once he came up again.

Changbin barely heard him, already well on his way to finally get that sleep.

Felix didn’t move away, even after he knew that Changbin had finally found sleep again. He was calm in a way he would never have expected he’d be after kissing Changbin. Not that he’d been thinking about kissing Changbin before, but in a way, it made perfect sense that he had just wanted to, and done that, enjoyed it, and wanted more of it. There was just something that felt perfectly natural and just _right_ about kissing Changbin. About anything related to Changbin, really, from simply wanting to spend time with him over sitting here watching him as he slept, to wanting to crawl into bed and under that blanket with him and sleep curled around him.

His thoughts were slowly interrupted by a tingling sensation starting on his chest, effectively distracting him when the tingling soon became an itch, then a burn.

Frowning, Felix rubbed at the spot through his shirt, hissing quietly when it didn’t stop, prompting him to peel his shirt away from his skin to peer down on his chest. His breath hitched as his gaze found a small, dark outline decorating his skin on the left side of his chest, where the burning was coming from. He couldn’t quite make out what it was, but his first guess was that it looked somehow like a bow and arrow.

His heart beat heavily, fast and a little unsteady as he lifted his gaze to Changbin, who’d been shifting around on the bed while Felix had been distracted by the burn on his chest, but had stilled again now. He was lying on his side once more, the covers half thrown off, and curiously enough, with one hand stuck through the neck-hole of his shirt.

Felix’ shirt was a few sizes too big on Changbin, making the neckline extra loose on him, which allowed that position without making it overly uncomfortable and waking Changbin up. Felix still decided to gently move Changbin’s hand out of the hole again, leaving it to lie in a more conventional position. Moved by the curiosity sparked as to why Changbin would have stuck his hand into his shirt in his sleep at the same time Felix’ own chest was burning, Felix couldn’t stop himself from peeking down at Changbin’s chest, where his hand had been, and despite having a suspicion about what he would find, the confirmation still made his heart jump and squeeze almost painfully.

There, on Changbin’s previously smooth chest, at about the same height as on Felix’ own, sat the exact same mark that now decorated Felix chest.

Felix had to cover his mouth to keep himself from squealing, from shouting, from doing anything loud and obnoxious that would wake Changbin up. It took him a while to calm down, to wipe away the tears of joy that filled his eyes, to steady his breathing and stop the shaking in his hands.

Taking a few deep breaths, he leaned over Changbin once more, pulling the thrown-off blankets up again to tuck him in, and brushed a soft kiss against his forehead with the possibly warmest smile of his life on his lips.

He had meant to ask Woojin later about some things, regarding the nature of this bond he apparently shared with Changbin. The appearance of these matching marks on both of them made that unnecessary, though. They confirmed his earlier suspicions and answered to a hope he hadn’t known until then he’d harbored.

There was a certain pep to his step once he stood up and moved to the door of his room, a swing that matched the way his heart beat with deep satisfaction and joy. He turned back once more to take in Changbin’s peaceful resting expression, and then opened the door to join his pack in the common area. There were some things they had to talk about.


	8. Chapter 8 - No.

The first thing Felix heard upon exiting his room was the hushed yet heated debate going on in the common area. He didn’t make an effort to hide his approach, but it seemed he wasn’t heard either way as he went to join the rest of the pack, stopping in the entrance to the common area.

“He was _there_ , with the rest of that scum pack, cornering Hyunjin and Seungmin! He caged them in along with everyone else. He is no different from them and I am not going to just overlook that!” Minho was currently arguing, just to be interrupted by Seungmin.

“He didn’t do anything, though! What if he was just there because he was curious what the rest of his pack was doing and got caught up in it?”

“That’s a mighty bold assumption and there is no way to prove that.” Hyunjin counter-argued.

“There is nothing to assume about that time he stood up for me, though. He risked his life for me, and almost lost it!”

“True, Innie, but who says he knew of the consequences at that time? And would he have done it if he knew what consequences that would have for him? I doubt it.”

Seungmin glared at Jisung.

“He knew of the consequences when he stood up for me in the library!”

“That was a relatively safe environment, anyway, and he must have known nothing would happen there, anyway, with the librarians around.” Minho objected.

“Well, he also knew we’d have to leave the library at some point, and that he’d be vulnerable again once he was out there again. And he still stood up for me against his pack!”

“You didn’t ask him to, did you, though?”

“Standing up for anyone else in a prickly situation you could easily stay out of is an honorable and commendable thing, irrelevant if you’re aware of the consequences or not. Despite whatever pack Changbin chose to join in the first place, his actions later on speak for themselves about what kind of morals he has. Besides, he’s no longer part of that pack.” Woojin decided to interject calmly into the heated debate.

“Yeah, well, that wasn’t really his decision, though, was it? He was kicked out, quite literally, so that’s not something you can hold in his favour.” Hyunjin spat, but Woojin only shrugged.

“Maybe. They are quite desperately trying to win him back, though, threatening him with even more violence than what he endures on a daily basis now if he doesn’t join them again, but he still refuses. He still stands his ground, knowing what is coming for him if he does so.”

“That’s his problem then, isn’t it? Not ours!” Jisung scoffed. He looked like he wanted to go on, but interrupted him when Chan sighed deeply, seemingly preparing to speak up for the first time himself.

“There are good reasons to take him in, as well as there are reasons not to; some weaker, some stronger. But aside from all those regarding his personality, we have to consider the bigger picture, too. What will be the consequences of not taking him in? He might die. We might be kicked out if the Academy decides to no longer tolerate not just packs, but wolves in general, if one dies, and we are not ready to fend for ourselves the way we are now, with no degrees, graduates of nothing. We’d have to live with the guilt of having stood by idly when we could have saved his life, too. On the other hand, if we take him in, we’ll have to protect him. We’ll have to defend him against the other pack, who might become even more hostile than they are now. And once we’re out of here, he will be one more whose tuition we’ll have to pay back. One more mouth to feed, one more head to put a roof over. It won’t be easy for us as it is, we’re going to be a pack of ten eventually. If we become a pack of twelve, it will be even harder.”

Felix couldn’t stand listening any longer, his heart having grown heavier with every single word any of his pack mates had said. It was clear that there was a definite rift going through his pack, and it pained him greatly to see the people he loved fighting with each other. Because of him, by extension.

He’d wanted to talk to them a moment ago, but now he didn’t feel like it anymore. He turned on his heels, deciding to go for a walk. He had to clear his head, calm himself down. And maybe get some food for himself and Changbin from the cafeteria, eventually.

He missed how silence fell over his pack as soon as the front door fell shut behind him, alerting all of them to the fact that he’d left. That he hadn’t been there, discussing with them, and that he wouldn’t join any time soon, now.

“Felix…” Jisung muttered, worry seeping into his voice as he stared at the empty space by the door. His head whipped around when Minho spoke up, though.

“Woojin, you look like you know something you aren’t telling us…”

Woojin did have that look, his usually gentle expression grim and stony in a way it very seldom was.

“I do. And before you ask, no, I am not going to tell you.”

“Woojinnie…” Chan tried, but withered under Woojin’s determined look.

“No. It’s not my place. That is something the lot of you will have to figure out yourselves.” With that, he got up, retreating to his and Chan’s room. Chan specifically flinched when he heard the lock click behind him, the message that he was not welcome at his mate’s side right now unmistakable.

What was he going to do? What was he missing? And how had he gotten into this mess, in the first place?

***

Felix had returned later that evening, finding everyone back in their rooms and the common area empty. That was unusual, but he didn’t mind that time. He preferred it to having to hear more fighting. He’d shared what food he’d gotten from the cafeteria with Changbin, who was only awake long enough to eat, and then they’d both gone to sleep.

It was a tight fit on the bed, but it worked. It took Felix a little while longer than Changbin to fall asleep, his mind preoccupied with how he should address the mark decorating both their chests eventually, but Changbin fell asleep quickly, and apparently, he was a cuddler when given the chance. He shuffled around a little, and then he was half draped over Felix, sleeping contently while using him as a pillow.

Felix found it absolutely impossible to continue with his worrying thoughts when his arms were full of Changbin, his weight warm and comforting half draped over him, and the calm the other clearly felt seeping through the bond so heavily it drowned out Felix’ own thoughts. And it wasn’t like he wasn’t tired himself. That combination was all it took to have him fall asleep soon after.

He was first to wake up the next morning, too. It was way too early, still, but he couldn’t fall back asleep, his mind quickly alert enough to take up his thoughts were he had left off the night before.

If it was because he sensed Felix restlessness or something else, Changbin never told him what woke him up soon after. He cuddled closer once again as he regained consciousness, blinking himself awake eventually. As soon as he did and realized the way he was cuddling up to Felix, he moved to put some distance between them, but Felix stopped him. His arms tightened around Changbin instinctively as he tried to move away, and the gesture alerted Changbin to the fact Felix was already awake.

“O-oh. Good morning?”

Felix couldn’t help a smile as his gaze met Changbin’s sleepy one.

“Good morning. Sleep well?”

Changbin blushed slightly, barely visible in the muted light of the room at this time of the day.

“I… I did. Sorry for-… clinging and crushing you like this? Have I slept like this the whole night?!”

Felix chuckled softly, brushing Changbin’s tousled hair out of his face.

“You couldn’t crush me if you tried, and I really didn’t mind you clinging. I’m glad to know I make for an acceptable pillow.”

Changbin groaned, collapsing back onto the bed (and Felix) from his half pushed up position.

“This is embarrassing.” He mumbled, half into the side of Felix’ chest.

Felix hummed in disapproval, starting to comb his hand through the rest of Changbin’s hair.

“I don’t see why.”

Changbin readjusted himself eventually, decidedly slipping out of Felix’ hold to lie more on the mattress than on Felix -although he still used Felix’ arm as pillow-and allowed the other to roll onto his side, too. For a moment, they just lay there, facing each other, sleepily studying each other’s faces in the half-light. Then, Felix sighed softly, finding the sooner he addressed what his mind was preoccupied with, the better.

“Changbin, there-… There’s something I need to talk to you about.”

Changbin drew his eyebrows in a frown, head tilted curiously.

“Hmm?”

Felix took a deep breath, trying to collect his scattered, swirling thoughts, but his mouth decided to start working before he was completely done.

 “There’s-… I don’t know if you’ve noticed it yet, since I don’t know if you woke up yesterday while I wasn’t here and looked, but-… You’ll definitely find out today, sooner or later, anyway, and I want to make sure you don’t freak out over it… Then again, you might not freak out, it’s really not something to freak out over, per se, but it might confuse you, or worry you, or somehmph-” He had to break off when Changbin’s hand came up to cover his rambling mouth.

“Felix. It’s too early for this. Just tell me.”

Felix nodded, taking another steadying breath once Changbin uncovered his mouth again.

“There is a new mark on your chest.”

Changbin stared at him as if he’d just told him the sky was going to be green today, and Felix took the silence as a prompt to elaborate.

“On the left side, kind of high up, but not high enough to peek out of your shirt… I just saw because you scratched at it when it appeared and then left your hand in your shirt when it stopped burning and I removed it so you could sleep comfortably. Your hand, not the mark.”

Changbin took a deep breath.

“Ok…”

“And I might have the same mark on my own chest.” Felix blurted out, holding his breath afterwards, as well as Changbin’s gaze, frantically searching and hoping to find any sign of what Changbin’s reaction would be before it hit full force.

“You-… Ok. Why?”

“Why?”

“Why do you have the same mark- Why do we have marks all of a sudden?”

Felix exhaled slowly, stalling for time.

“You know how we figured we share a bond yesterday?”

Changbin hummed, nodding.

“It’s more than just a regular bond.”

Changbin’s eyes widened slightly.

“In fact, it looks like it’s possibly the strongest bond there is.”

“What…?”

“I-… I’m fairly sure we’re soulmates, Changbin.” He blurted out, interrupting Changbin’s hesitant question.

Changbin exhaled slowly, trying to wrap his head around that piece of information. He couldn’t, though, he didn’t know how. He didn’t know what this meant, not really.

“That’s-… Isn’t that-… I thought that was just a myth?”

Felix shook his head.

“No. It’s not a myth. It’s rare, but very real. And with us, everything that’s happened so far, the bond coming from nowhere, now the marks… It’s the only logical conclusion.”

Changbin thought about it for a moment.

“What-… Why is it the only logical conclusion? Why is it not just a regular bond?”

Felix hesitated for a moment, then decided to explain from the beginning.

“Bonds-… Bonds don’t form just like that, like ours did. You see, pack bonds, you are either born into them, or they form through an alpha that connects everyone, or through slowly built up trust and love. Individual bonds, like between chosen mates, take time to build, too. Time, love, dedication, and more often than not, some kind of situation to force the bond, to prove the devotion and dedication of the mates to each other. Many mates don’t ever manage to build up an individual bond.

“Soulmates, however… That’s a bond that forms quickly when two individuals just-… just connect. It doesn’t need prompting. It doesn’t even need a lot of interaction. It’s just something that happens when two individuals that complement each other in a certain way meet, even if just in passing.

“It’s not like it’s just there and bam!, you can read each other’s thoughts; it grows, too. From noticing each other repeatedly, feeling kind of a pull, then the need to talk, to be closer, and so on, until it establishes a connection between feelings and sensations, and eventually the connection grows to a two-way road both parties can use to willingly share or block the sharing of sensations, images, sounds, feelings. Later, even thoughts and with time it’s possible to talk to each other through the bond as if standing right next to the other, even if one is hallway around the planet.”

Changbin let that sink in for a while.

“That… That sounds suspiciously like us, yeah…”

“See, I thought so, too.”

Changbin nodded pensively.

“How do you even know so much about soulmate bonds?” He asked suddenly.

“Ah-… Chan and Woojin…”

Changbin’s eyes widened.

“They are soulmates?”

Felix nodded.

“Yeah. I have a feeling Woojin knew about us before I was even aware, too…”

Changbin grew quiet again, but Felix could almost see the cogs turning in his head. He didn’t feel any spikes of emotions of any kind coming from Changbin that could have unsettled him, though, so that eased his own nervousness a little.

“So… if we are soulmates… What does that mean? I mean, for us? What…” He didn’t know how to express the question that lingered in his mind, wordless but all consuming.

Felix swallowed thickly, understanding what Changbin meant regardless.

“Well, for one… It means we are connected from now on. We have a bond that can not be broken. We… this bond, it will only grow stronger… What we make of it… I don’t know if we have any control over that, to be honest…”

Changbin nodded slowly, then sighed, shaking his head to dispel useless thoughts.

“I suppose we will find out eventually, right? There’s not much of a point to worry about it now, is there?”

Felix blinked in surprise, then relaxed somewhat.

“No, I guess not…”

They lay in silence for a moment, just enjoying the warmth under the blankets and the fact they didn’t have to be up and getting ready for classes just yet, until a noise from somewhere out in the hallways filtered through to them and alerted them to the rest of the Academy’s inhabitants slowly waking up.

“I should probably get up and go back to my dorm…” Changbin spoke up then.

Felix frowned a little.

“Why?”

“Well… For one, I’d like a shower and some of my own clothes, even if yours are quite comfortable. And then, you have to go to classes today, and while I plan on skipping because to be honest, I feel like crap, still, I do not feel comfortable staying here, around your pack, on my own. And I’m not going to allow you to skip because of me!” Changbin explained, tacking the last part on when he felt Felix wanting to offer just that.

Felix closed his mouth, already open to protest, and his lip formed a quite spectacular pout instead.

“Oh, stop that!” Changbin shoved him lightly, sitting up to get out of bed.

Felix grimaced when he felt the discomfort Changbin still felt from his bruises through the bond as the other stood up.

“Are you sure you’ll be ok, though?” He asked, hesitant, but Changbin waved his concern off.

“I’ve had worse and made it through just fine. Don’t worry about me, I can handle it.”

Felix shook his head, getting up as well and striding over to where Changbin stood, hugging him gently from behind and hooking his chin over his shoulder.

“That’s exactly what worries me. You shouldn’t need to have to go through things like this in the first place, but you should definitely not go through it alone. I don’t want you to have to go through it alone. I want to be there for you.”

Changbin sighed, his body relaxing back against Felix’ of its own accord, hands coming up to lie over Felix’ on his chest, caressing them lightly.

“There isn’t much you can do, though…” It sounded more like a question.

“I can… I can help put more ointment on your bruises later, when you’re done showering. And get you food from the cafeteria. And keep you company.”

Changbin hummed, thinking about it for a while.

“If you really want to… You can’t neglect your pack-times, though. Or your studies. And of course, yourself.”

Nuzzling his face against Changbin’s neck, Felix hummed pensively. He didn’t answer for quite a while, until Changbin turned his head and leaned away just slightly, dislodging Felix from his position.

“I won’t neglect any of those, promise. But you are a priority for me, too, now.”

Changbin bit his lips, a happy smile fighting to break through as warmth spread in his chest. He didn’t want to acknowledge it so fast, but there was no logical reason not to since he could feel Felix’ sincerity through the bond with how bright it burned in him. There was a small part of him that told him to be careful and to not accept his offer, his warm words so quickly after the disaster that giving in and joining the other pack so quickly had turned out to be, but he was quick to dismiss it; This was Felix. This was different. They were _soulmates_! He wanted this, whatever _this_ held for them.

“We should go.” Felix murmured, interrupting Changbin’s thoughts as he reluctantly unwound his arms from around Changbin.

“’We’?”

Felix gave him a droll stare.

“I’m not letting you wander these hallways alone this early when you are still too sore to really defend yourself against any pricks. Besides, I’m planning to at least go down and get you breakfast from the cafeteria before I’m forced to abandon you for hours on end!”

Changbin rolled his eyes at Felix’ overprotective mannerisms, but he was grateful nonetheless.

Yes, this was different, this time around.

***

Felix returned to his dorm still a good while before classes would start, since Changbin had urged him to go back to have enough time to shower, eat, and do whatever else he needed to do before class, so Felix went.

He found himself wishing he had straggled, wasted time on the way over, just so he wouldn’t have had to walk in on his pack arguing among themselves once again. He took a moment to get his bearings before walking into the common area to put an end to this pointless discussion, this useless fight creating a rift among the people he loved.

“You don’t have to add anyone to the pack, you know?” He took the moment of silence that his entrance caused to ask. He was met with confused stares.

“Changbin is not asking to join the pack. Nor am I asking that you accept him, if you don’t want to. What I am going to say, however, is that I will not leave his side.”

Shocked gasps were heard, and a few members’ gazes hardened.

“What the hell…?!”

“Felix…!”

“He’s from the other pack! He is part of those assholes that have been tormenting us for ages! How could you?!”

Felix never expected them to understand, and he didn’t ask to be understood right away, but insults against Changbin made his blood boil, and an angry growl started low in his throat as he glared at Hyunjin, who promptly shrunk back a little.

“He’s _not_ part of them. And if you think they’ve been tormenting us, try spending a day in Changbin’s place! You know _nothing_ about him!”

“But you do?” Minho scoffed, and Felix leveled his glare at him. Minho didn’t flinch.

“As a matter of fact, I do. Because _I_ took the time to get to _know_ him. And no matter what you say, I am not going to abandon my soulmate because you decide to be pre-conceited assholes regarding him!”

The word soulmate fell like a bomb into their midst, one that swallowed every noise, every movement, leaving the room in total silence. It was Jisung who eventually broke that silence, even if just slightly, after what felt like way too long.

“S-soulmate?” He stuttered.

Felix nodded, pulling the neck-line of his shirt down a little, exposing the mark on his chest.

“Soulmate.”

It wasn’t enough to break the spell, the silence continuing too long for Felix. The lack of reaction from most of his pack became unbearable for him, and he had to leave. Turning on his heels, he dashed into his room, which still smelt so much like Changbin that a few of the tears he’d been holding back effectively in front of his pack came loose and ran down his cheeks. He wiped at them hastily, reigning the remaining ones back in as he grabbed his school bag and left the dorm without stalling any further.

It hurt, the lack of acceptance, the hard-headedness he encountered in the people he thought would always be by his side. But he meant what he said, he wouldn’t abandon Changbin. He was his soulmate, he wasn’t sure if it was even possible to _not_ stay at your soulmate’s side. And if his pack couldn’t accept that… He didn’t want to think about it; it hurt, and he wasn’t about to cry in the fucking hallway on the way to class.

 


	9. Chapter 9 - Wider Horizons

It was an awkward atmosphere between Felix and Hyunjin when Hyunjin joined the former in class just minutes before it was supposed to start. They weren’t talking to each other, not even glancing at each other, despite sharing a desk. Felix wasn’t that interested in Literature to warrant the attention he was paying to the teacher, Hyunjin wasn’t fooled by that. It was painfully obvious he didn’t want to interact with him, and while Hyunjin was acutely aware of the _why_ , he wanted to know the reason behind the why.

“How did you even get to know him?” He asked eventually, quietly enough not to be picked up by their classmates, but loud and obvious enough for Felix to pick it up.

Felix shot him a look out of the corner of his eyes that told him he was not in his good graces at the moment, but he must have seen more in Hyunjin’s face than the contempt that could have been perceived from the words if one looked for it. And truly, Hyunjin was genuinely interested. He knew Felix wouldn’t just randomly befriend an asshole, never mind find his soulmate in one!

Gradually, Felix relaxed a little.

“He stuck out to me. I got curious. After what he did for Jeongin and Seungmin, things turned out in a way that I ended up teaching him how to fight so he could defend himself against the attacks his old pack rains on him at every turn.”

Hyunjin’s eyes widened.

“You taught him how to fight?! Why-…?”

Felix shot him an annoyed glare.

“I just told you why.”

“I know, but… Why did you have to?”

“I didn’t have to. I wanted to, because he didn’t know how to.”

Hyunjin didn’t seem to understand.

“But… Shouldn’t he have learned before…?”

Felix sighed.

“Not all people grow up with people willing to teach them shit, Hyunjin.”

Hyunjin flinched, sitting back in his chair in silence for a while, letting Felix resume paying attention to the teacher if he wanted to. Felix didn’t, though.

“Why are you suddenly interested, anyway?” He muttered, without looking at Hyunjin.

“I… I just don’t understand. A lot of things.”

Felix snorted quietly.

“That’s not news.”

Hyunjin kicked him under the table.

“Hey, that’s mean!”

Felix rolled his eyes, but a ghost of a smile tugged on his lips. He waited until the teacher wasn’t focused on their side of the class anymore.

“There isn’t much to understand. I got curious about Changbin when I noticed him the day you and Seungmin got caught by the other pack. Which, by the way, he didn’t condone, was absolutely horrified by, and still beats himself up over for so much as ending up in the same room you were in.”

Hyunjin bit back a scoff, but his disbelief dripped from his voice.

“He told you that?”

Felix shook his head.

“I smelt it on him that very same day. It’s what got me curious. As for the latter, I’ve figured by his reactions every time the occasion is brought up.”

Hyunjin still found it hard to believe, but he accepted that Felix probably had a better way of judging his soulmate than he had, so he didn’t argue.

“Ok. And then?”

“Then?”

“After you got curious?”

Felix shrugged.

“Nothing, for a while. Then, he protected Innie and was almost killed for it.”

“And you took him to the nurse.”

“I did. And I was devastated when Headmaster announced he might not make it the next day.”

“But you didn’t even really know him by then!”

“I know. I only really got to know him way after that time Chan pulled him out of a fight and brought him over for lunch, after I heard his old pack threaten him with even worse violence than they were already dealing him if he refused to join their ranks again, and offered to teach him how to defend himself.”

Hyunjin shook his head slowly.

“I still don’t get it completely. Don’t they fight for fun all the time in that pack? Shouldn’t he have learned from them?”

Felix huffed.

“They don’t know how to fight there. They just know how to use their advantage in numbers to beat someone up. Besides, Changbin’s strength is his brains, not his muscles. They knew that in the other pack, too. And they needed him, for his brains. So, they left him alone while he didn’t act up.”

“How can someone walk through life so defenseless, though? What about his family? Is he an orphan, or why has no one taught him before?”

Felix rolled his eyes, clearly over Hyunjin’s one-track questions.

“They never deemed him fit for it. He told me he was the runt of his family.”

Hyunjin dropped his pencil along with his jaw at that, gaping at Felix.

“He _what_?! That’s so archaic, did you really believe that?!”

Felix shifted uncomfortably, eyeing the teacher, who was sending glares their way, warily.

“He has the mark, too. I have no reason not to believe him.”

Hyunjin’s eyes filled with horror.

“That’s barbaric! I thought no one even did that anymore! Are you sure-”

Felix gave him a look that silenced him on the spot, since the teacher was focusing on them now.

“If the gentlemen have something important to discuss, feel free to do that in the hallways, but not in my class! There are people who are actually trying to follow this class!”

Hyunjin looked around surreptitiously, finding half the class asleep, the other half quickly hiding whatever they had been doing to distract themselves from the dry-as-a-desert subject. He had a feeling that pointing out how the possibility that anyone was willingly trying to follow this class was even less likely than someone actually being marked as runt in this day and age wouldn’t go down too well, though. So, he remained quiet, focusing on the patterns in the wood of the desk he shared with Felix.

They didn’t continue their conversation once the teacher picked up her presentation again, sitting in silence while Felix lazily doodled what looked like a lot of pierced Bs down the side of his notebook pages and Hyunjin mulled over what he’d learned from Felix about Changbin.

They didn’t have time to continue after class let out, either, both having to hurry to different classrooms relatively far away from the one they shared for their next classes.

Hyunjin wasn’t content not having anyone to discuss the new information he’d gotten from Felix with, though. He shared his third class of the day with Jisung, but they were sat quite far at the front. With Changbin, too, usually, he remembered as he waited for Jisung, but Changbin’s chair remained empty for this class. Staring at the empty spot unseeingly, Hyunjin found himself wondering if the other wolf was really that badly injured once again. Would he be ok? But if he was Felix’ soulmate, and Felix wasn’t absolutely besides himself with worry, he must not be feeling that bad, right?

He shook his head at himself, trying to focus on something else but Changbin for once this morning. Like, on History class, for example.

His attempts were thwarted by Jisung nudging his side with his elbow eventually, catching his attention.

“What has you frowning as if someone dumped a surprise test in Literature on you earlier this whole time?”

Hyunjin jumped slightly, but sighed and sat back, finding Jisung’s gaze.

“I talked with Felix earlier.”

Jisung’s face darkened a little with what looked like sadness to Hyunjin.

“And?”

“About his soulmate.”

Jisung flinched slightly, averting his gaze.

“How could life be so cruel and give him a soulmate like that, anyway, huh…”

Hyunjin hummed, pensive, and Jisung turned to focus on him once more when he found the other not immediately agreeing with him.

“What?”

“Did you know Felix’ soulmate is a runt?”

Jisung’s eyes widened.

“No way! That isn’t really a thing anymore, is it?”

Hyunjin shrugged.

“Felix says he’s even marked one.”

“What the hell?!”

“Silence, please!” The teacher’s words cut through their conversation, and they ducked their heads. They were too far in the front of the class to not be too obvious while talking.

“Dorms?” Jisung whispered while the teacher was listening to one of their classmate’s questions, knowing Hyunjin had a free period next, too. Hyunjin nodded.

Class couldn’t let out fast enough after that, and of course it dragged on endlessly. Still, when it finally let out, they kept quiet until they were back at their dorm, finding it seemingly empty.

“Do you think Felix would really leave us for him?” Jisung asked as they sat on the couch, sadness written all over his face.

“If he’s really his soulmate, it’s definitely possible, if he feels it’s the only way to be with him.”

Jisung swallowed thickly, and Hyunjin could tell he was holding back tears. As he often did, Jisung converted his sadness into anger, though.

“Why did someone like Felix, shining-bright-like-the-sun powerful alpha Felix, have to be paired up with someone so-… I mean, it’s fucking cruel and sucks, but if his own _mother_ marked him a runt, there has to be something-… Just, why Felix?!”

Holding his tears back didn’t quite work, and Jisung wiped angrily at the few that escaped.

Hyunjin sighed, shrugging.

“They must complete each other in some way… If they are that different, there has to be something we don’t see… They can’t be polar opposites, can they?”

“Talking about Felix and Changbin?” Someone interrupted them, and as the two looked up, they saw Woojin stand in the door to his and Chan’s bedroom. Hyunjin nodded, answering his question, and Woojin strode over, sitting down in an armchair close to the couch they were sitting on.

“Felix dropped quite the bomb on you this morning, huh?”

Jisung huffed.

“I don’t get it! Did you know about this?”

Woojin shrugged.

“I suspected it. Felix wouldn’t go behind Chan’s back for no reason, nor forget all about us and our plans just like that. So, when he went to hang out with Changbin every day at some point, I had my suspicions.”

“You knew where he was all that time?!”

Woojin shrugged.

“Not a hard guess when he came back smelling like Changbin every time.”

“And you didn’t tell anyone?! Not even Chan?!”

“All of you, including Chan, have the subtlety of a rhinoceros in a porcelain store. What Felix and Changbin have happens maybe once in a million cases. Yet almost all of you are stuck up on the fact that Changbin belonged to another pack at some point. It’s honestly ridiculous.”

Hyunjin huffed quietly.

“The problem isn’t the fact he belonged to another pack per se, but _which_ pack he belonged to!”

Woojin sighed, weariness seeping into it, but he was nothing if not patient. He fixed both Jisung and Hyunjin with an open stare, making sure he had their attention before starting.

“Felix told you Changbin is the runt of his family, right. Do you know what that means?”

Hyunjin rolled his eyes.

“Well, of course we do!”

Woojin shook his head, though.

“No, I mean, do you really know the implications of it? Besides the his-mother-tried-to-kill-him-as-a-pup?”

Both of them flinched, looking a little lost, though.

“Growing up as the runt of a family, especially a marked runt, is a traumatic experience. No one in a pack sides with a runt, especially a marked runt, ever. Runts are starved of attention, of affection, all their lives, starting from the day they are marked, which is usually when they are still tiny little helpless pups. Imagine a little baby, crying because they are cold, or hungry, or dirty, or lonely, and no one picks them up, unless absolutely necessary. Imagine a toddler, having to learn how to walk because if they don’t, they are left behind. No one there to catch them when they fall, to help them up, to comfort them when they hurt themselves. Imagine a little child, trying their best all the time, and never getting praised. All they ever hear is what they lack in, what their shortcomings are. All their life. So, they work harder, but it’s never enough. They never get to know the feeling of a gentle touch, a comforting word, or even so much as acceptance.”

Woojin paused, giving the younger pair time to let his words sink in.

“Now, imagine someone who grew up like that finds someone who doesn’t look at them with contempt for once. Who doesn’t criticize every breath they take. Who maybe even praises them or appreciates something they do. And maybe that someone is even a little rough at times and does things that they don’t agree with, but between all that, there are still moments where they are kind and make them feel like they matter for once. And that person offers them a place among others who also don’t treat them like dirt, who aren’t perfect but still treat them ok, accept them how they are. Do you think they would reject that?”

Jisung and Hyunjin had long since averted their gazes, unable to look Woojin in the eye anymore, or each other, trying to find something else to focus on. The silence reigning in the room now that Woojin had stopped talking was eventually interrupted by a voice no more than a murmur, but they could all hear it clearly.

“You make it sound like we are the villains here…”

Woojin looked up to find Minho standing in the hallway opening.

“That was never my intention. All I am trying to do is open your horizons a little, and maybe prompt you to overthink your definition of evil before you label someone as such for simply ending up with the wrong crowd without understanding where they are coming from.”

***

Felix was already in the cafeteria, browsing the day’s menu, when he realized he didn’t know what Changbin would prefer for lunch. He debated just winging it and choosing whatever, but he didn’t want to risk choosing something Changbin wouldn’t like.

Now, he could go all the way back and upstairs to ask Changbin, but it was _far,_ and he really didn’t like climbing stairs if it wasn’t absolutely necessary. And maybe, just maybe, he wouldn’t have to. If he focused really hard on the options, with the intention to share his impression of them with Changbin, kind of like he would through the pack bond, maybe Changbin would pick up on his intention and choose one?

He decided to try it out, contemplating the different options for way longer than he usually would. That was, until he couldn’t focus on the gratinated zucchinis if his life depended on it, his mind going back to how delicious the baked salmon and oven potatoes looked. He gave up on the zucchini, then, deciding to go with two servings of the salmon to share with Changbin, and hoped he got it right and it wasn’t his own appetite that had sabotaged his attempt at asking his mate for his lunch preferences.

He needn’t worry, though, for as soon as he knocked on Changbin’s dorm door, it swung open and Changbin practically pounced on him.

“Did it work? Did you get my answer?!”

“Salmon and oven potatoes?”

Changbin practically squealed, hugging Felix tight.

“Come in! I’m starving!”

Felix chuckled, following Changbin to his room with the food.

They spread the food out on Changbin’s bed, sitting down on opposite ends of it.

“We should try doing that more often. It’s handy!” Changbin suggested, and Felix chuckled.

“Beats walking up the stairs from the cafeteria twice during one lunch break any day.”

“My point exactly!” Changbin agreed, before digging into his food and going quiet. Only when they were done eating, while putting the empty containers away, did they pick up conversation again.

“How are your bruises healing? Do you need the ointment again? I brought it along.” Felix eventually asked. Changbin thought about it for a moment.

“There are some that could use some, I suppose. There’s one on my back that is particularly foul.”

“Want my help, or do you want to put it on yourself?”

“If you don’t mind…”

Changbin’s cheeks tinted a little pink, and it was positively adorable, Felix thought. This time, when he went to sit on the bed, he sat considerably closer to Changbin, tube of cream in his hands.

“I don’t mind at all. Can you lift your shirt?”

Changbin took his shirt off completely instead.

“My arms are going to fall off if I try to hold my shirt up until you are done. I have a feeling you’re going to exaggerate again and take extra care of every minor micro bruise…” He justified his action, and Felix rolled his eyes.

“Well, I am _sorry_ , I just want you to heal quickly!”

Changbin chuckled, patting Felix’ knee beside him affectionately.

“I know. I wasn’t exactly complaining, was I? I really appreciate your concern and attention.”

Felix didn’t answer, shaking his head quietly and instead getting to work covering Changbin’s bruises with the healing cream once again.

“I never expected you to have such soft hands, to be honest. Knowing how much strength you have in them, I always expect your touch to be rough. I can’t seem to get used to how soft it actually is.” Changbin admitted as Felix was smoothing the cream into his skin covering the bruises on his back.

“Well, I’m not a total woodland creature. I’ve not just heard of, but also made use of hand creams before.”

Changbin rolled his eyes at Felix’ defensive tone.

“That is very pleasant to hear. I feel like I really lucked out with such a civilized soulmate, then. Next thing you’re going to tell me you even know what soap is!”

“Soap, shampoo, conditioner, and even -fasten your seatbelts, ladies and gentlemen- _body lotion_.”

“Now you’re just straight up bragging!”

The theatrical look Changbin gave Felix over his shoulder was just too much, and after holding it for about two seconds, Felix couldn’t contain his laughter anymore. Changbin joined in soon, Felix’ amusement infectious both through the bond and to watch.

“You’re so silly… Who would have thought…?!”

Felix contained his laughter slowly.

“You bring out the worst in me.”

“Sure. Are you done back there?”

Felix hummed, smoothing a few spots with thicker layers of cream out before nodding.

“Yeah. You want to do your ribs?”

“Actually, if you don’t mind… Your hands are already messy, so you might as well keep going…”

Felix didn’t mind, far from it. His throat went a little dry as Changbin turned around, leaning back on his elbows next to Felix to facilitate his access to the front of his torso, though. Changbin gave him a curious look as he focused on applying the cream maybe a little too much.

“You’re flustered.” He eventually remarked, finally identifying the emotion through the bond.

Felix huffed quietly.

“Well, it’s kind of… With you leaning back like that, if feels like I’m kind of groping you, feeling you up, here. It’s a little flustering.”

“If you put it like _that_ … Should I sit up?”

Felix shook his head.

“Only if you want to. I won’t spontaneously combust just yet.”

Changbin hummed.

“If you don’t mind, I’ll stay like this. My stomach feels so full, sitting isn’t the most comfortable position.”

Felix could relate to that. He didn’t say anything, focusing on the bruises littering Changbin’s torso instead. For a while at least, until he reached his stomach.

“Your stomach has become really toned as of late…” He couldn’t help but remark as he tended to a bruise that ran from the side of Changbin’s ribcage towards his navel.

Changbin gave him a skeptical look.

“It’s still soft, though?”

Felix hummed in agreement.

“It is. Still, more toned than when we started training. You’re looking great, by the way.”

“So, you’re into Dalmatians, huh…”

Felix gave Changbin a droll stare, before he got what he was getting at and rolled his eyes.

“If that’s what you are, it would seem so… I could have sworn you were a wolf, though.”

Changbin spluttered slightly at the answer, caught up on the first part. Felix gave him a questioning look.

“What?”

“Ah, you… Never mind, I didn’t expect-…”

“What did you not expect?”

“That answer.”

Felix frowned slightly, mentally reviewing his answer, before it started to dawn on him.

“That I’m into you?”

Changbin let himself fall back onto his bed fully, needing at least one of his arms to cover his face. It was a futile attempt, his blush clearly visible down his neck and top of his chest, too.

Felix sighed quietly.

“Of course I am, silly. I thought that was quite obvious by now!”

Changbin took a deep breath, his blush dying down a little, but he still kept his face covered a little longer.

“It’s not that easy for me to fully grasp that, ok…” he mumbled eventually, sitting up again to pull his shirt back on, since Felix was done tending to the bruises.

Felix scooted forward a little, placing a hand on Changbin’s shoulder and rubbing it softly.

“Hey, that’s ok. I’ll make sure to keep reminding you until you can’t doubt it anymore if you want me to.”

Changbin wanted to lean away, consciously, but his body betrayed him and he leaned back, into Felix’ touch, turning somewhat towards him again.

“You won’t get tired eventually?”

“It’ll take as long as it takes. And I’ll be right here.” It wasn’t coincidental that Felix’ free hand came to lie over the mark on Changbin’s chest. It tingled slightly, warming under Felix’ touch, even through his shirt. Changbin’s own hand came to lie over Felix’, and he turned around further to face him.

“I don’t really get how this happened… You… Me… I mean… You are so far out of my league, it’s not even funny. I… I’m scared this is a mistake somehow, and fate is just going to turn around and bitch-slap me, take the mark away with an ‘Ooops, sorry, wrong person’, and slap it on someone else.”

Felix couldn’t help but chuckle, but at the same time shifted his hand on his shoulder to tighten his hold on Changbin.

“That won’t happen, Bin. There is no mistake. And if Fate so much as dared lift a hand to strike you, I would bite its head off. I’m not letting anyone take you away from me.” He was serious again as he reached the last words, and Changbin shivered involuntarily in his hold.

“Well, unless you don’t… I mean, I won’t-… If you don’t want-…”

Changbin’s eyes widened as something akin to panic flashed in them.

“No, I do! I want you, Felix!”

Felix met his gaze levelly, and for a moment Changbin held it, before heat accompanied by a fierce blush crept up Changbin’s cheeks and he broke the eye contact.

“That sounded so wrong, can I please just disappear into thin air? That would be amazing right now.”

Felix chuckled, wrapping both of his arms around Changbin to pull him against his chest, where Changbin immediately hid his face. Felix rubbed his back comfortingly, before leaning down to murmur into Changbin’s ear.

“I’m glad we are on the same page about that. I want you, too, Bin. Only you.”

Changbin’s breath hitched, and he squirmed a little in Felix’ hold but didn’t back away.

“Felix?” He mumbled against Felix’ chest after a while.

“Hm?”

“Will you kiss me again? While I’m not about to fall asleep?”

Felix’ heart leapt in his chest, and he was sure Changbin could feel it, if not against his cheek then through the bond, since he sat up a little, facing Felix again.

“Absolutely.” Felix’ answer was scarcely more than a sharp exhale, one of his hands coming up to cup Changbin’s face. “Anytime you want.”

Their lips met hesitantly, but any hesitation faded as they fit together like two pieces of a puzzle, two pieces that were meant to fit together. There was no rush, no frantic heartbeats, no feeling as if the world was tilting or stopped spinning; none of those overused cliché romantic feelings one would expect in a situation like theirs. Instead, all there was, was a sense of belonging, of coming home, peace, safety.

Felix hadn’t even known that he was lacking those feelings before, having thought himself content with his pack. Only now that he’d found Changbin and that void was filled did he become aware that it had been there. And now he knew he would do everything in his power to make sure it never opened again.

The school bell ringing and signaling the end of the lunch break in five minutes in the distance prompted Changbin to pull back and out of the kiss eventually.

“You need to go back to class.”

Felix whined, giving him a pleading look. And Changbin was almost tempted to give in, Felix’ pout even more spectacular than usual with his lips flushed and plumper than normal from their kiss. He couldn’t resist at least leaning in to kiss him once more, quickly, before pulling back again.

“I’m not letting you skip again because of me. Go on!”

Felix frowned but reluctantly got off the bed, feeling as if a piece of him stayed back there. And in fact, it did, since Changbin didn’t get up.

“I’ll be back after classes let out.” Felix announced, but Changbin gave him a stern look.

“Don’t neglect your pack. They need you, too.”

Felix’s frown only deepened.

“They have each other, what do they need me for all the time? I need _you_!”

Changbin stood up then, closing the distance between him and Felix.

“Felix, don’t argue with me on this, please. I’m sure they need you, specifically, now more than ever. I can only imagine what the revelation that I, of all people, am your soulmate has caused with them. They might hate me, but they love you. It’s up to you to dispel the tension that’s built in your pack now.”

Felix sighed, exasperated.

“I am not going to leave you, Changbin. No matter what they say.”

Changbin felt his heart clench, momentarily giddy over the sincerity in Felix’ words, as well as the meaning of those words per se, but it was short lived, since he knew he would never allow Felix to throw away his loving pack for someone like him. He wouldn’t be Felix’ ruin.

“Don’t make any rash decisions. Talk to them first, listen to them, and take their concerns seriously. I’m sure they will do the same for you. But first, classes. You are going to be late!”

He gently shoved Felix towards the door, and Felix let him.

“Can I at least bring you dinner later?” Felix tried before Changbin shoved him out of the door.

“I don’t mind not having to risk run-ins with my old pack. So, yeah. But only if you’re not using it as excuse to hide from your pack!”

Felix rolled his eyes but offered him a small smile.

“Ok, ok. I’ll talk to them. Damn, you are persistent!”


	10. Chapter 10 - Walk with me

Chapter 10

 

Changbin got better, deciding to join classes again after another day spending holed up in his room. He told Felix he was fine, he couldn’t stay cooped up forever, but Felix could feel through their bond that Changbin wasn’t as sure about his decision as he tried to let on. Naturally, that led to Felix making sure he stayed right by Changbin’s side whenever he needed to go somewhere outside of his dorm.

“Felix, I can handle myself, I don’t need you to act as my bodyguard everywhere I go!” Changbin eventually exasperated, sometime during the afternoon of the very first day he decided to join classes again.

Felix frowned at him.

“I can literally feel your anxiety over having another run-in with your old pack on your own. I’m not going to let that happen!”

Changbin rolled his eyes, shoving Felix lightly.

“At least half of that is your own anxiety about me so much as tripping over my own feet. I will be fine, Felix. I promise. You are acting ridiculous.”

“I am not! There is a very real threat of your old pack cornering you again, and now that they know you’ve learned how to fight, they’ll gang up on you in larger numbers. I will _not_ let them beat you up again!”

Changbin stopped in his tracks, turning so fast Felix bumped into him. Felix caught himself and Changbin, so they wouldn’t fall, but didn’t move away.

“Felix. You are overreacting. You are neglecting your own classes to get me to mine, and knowing you, you will neglect your studies, your homework, your pack, yourself, in the end, over me. I am not going to let you do that. You need to let me deal with my own stuff until I ask you for help and focus on your own life until then. We may be soulmates, but we are still two different beings, each with their own life, and we can’t neglect those for what we have with each other.”

“But-…”

“Felix! Have you been listening to what I’ve said?”

“I have! But you are a part of my life now! A big, important part!”

Changbin sighed, rubbing at his temples.

“I know. And that’s ok, more than ok, I am glad for it. But I am not your whole life. And if you try to make me that, I am going to learn how to block the bond, and not let you back in until you’ve seen reason. You can’t survive on me alone!”

Felix gaped at him, pain flashing in his eyes. Changbin hated himself a little for being the reason for that pain. Gently, he cupped Felix’ face in one hand.

“Felix. Please. Don’t smother me. I’m not saying I don’t want to spend time with you, we can still meet up for lunch and dinner and breakfast and hang out, but you need to live your own life, too. And so do I. This is all still very, very new for me, and I need my alone time, too. I never thought I’d say that after spending so much time alone in my life, but I really need that. I am not the social type like you are, and not having any time to myself is hard on me. And you isolating yourself from your pack for me is going to be hard on you eventually, too. And you might even end up blaming me for that. Don’t protest, I know you find that unconceivable right now, but it could happen, if we let it. And I am not going to let that happen.”

Felix looked forlorn, troubled, confused, but above all desperate, and it tugged at Changbin’s heartstrings.

“I’m sorry, Felix, but it’s for the best. We both have to learn how to compromise and to deal with this in a healthy way. You should spend dinner and the rest of the day with your pack. We can meet up for breakfast tomorrow, though, if you want.”

Felix swallowed thickly but nodded after a moment.

“Ok…” He rasped out, and Changbin’s heart clenched again, but he didn’t give in. He stood on his tiptoes, having to stretch a little to be able to reach Felix’ lips with his own for a small peck.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Lix.”

Felix nodded numbly, frozen in place as he watched Changbin disappear behind the next bend in the hallway.

Changbin could still feel Felix’ confusion and pain through the bond, but he resolutely decided to ignore it as he strutted towards his next class. This hadn’t been easy on him, but it was necessary, for both of them.

“Trying to worm your way into the other pack by hooking up with one of them? You know that won’t work, right? They’d never consider taking someone like you in. Sooner they’d kick out their own precious pretty boy.”

Changbin’s head snapped around to find his old roommate trailing behind him.

“Piss off.” He spat, really not in the mood for anyone from his old pack and their shit.

His old roommate didn’t seem to get the message, though, closing the distance between them dangerously.

“I would be careful with the way you talk to me now that you’ve ditched your bodyguard back there, you know.”

Changbin saw the other’s intention from a mile away, intercepting his hit long before it could make contact with him and twisting his body in a way that brought his former roommate’s arms with him, and onto his back. The boy wailed in pain, dropping to his knees as Changbin twisted his arm further up his back.

“I said: Piss. Off!” Changbin snarled, shoving the other away from himself as he let go of his arm. The wolf barely had time to brace himself against the floor with his other arm to keep from smashing his face into the tiles, fear flashing in his eyes for a moment.

Changbin didn’t spare him another glance, nor any of the other students that had witnessed the scene, continuing on his way to his next class. He could feel Felix through the bond, knowing the other had felt what was going on and was about to hurry back to his side.

Internally, Changbin growled, hoping his mate would get the message. And he did, he just knew Felix had stopped in his tracks once again, even more confused and surprised than before.

Changbin shook his head with a sigh. He felt like he should have waited another day to join classes again, just to have one more day without having to deal with all this mess. Then again, he wouldn’t have been ready for this one day later, either.

***

It hadn’t been just Changbin’s old roommate who had witnessed Felix’ and Changbin’s discussion in the hallway. There was someone else, too, who worriedly watched Felix from the sidelines now with a heavy heart. He didn’t want to admit it just yet, but he was grateful for what Changbin had done, even if he hated seeing Felix hurt.

He hung back, watching Felix start down the hallway determinedly all of a sudden, just to stop after a few hurried steps, confusion and surprise written all over his face. The white wolf visibly deflated, shaking his head and rubbing at his eyes harshly before turning around and striding down the other direction.

Hastily, he ducked back into the doorway he’d been standing in, but Felix didn’t notice him there. He doubted Felix would have noticed him had he been standing right in his way, actually, as he observed him leaving.

With a deep sigh, he shook his head, preparing to continue on his own way. He really needed to talk to Felix. Thanks to Changbin, he would finally have an opening to do just that tonight.

***

Felix really didn’t feel like joining his pack for dinner, but Hyunjin and Seungmin had dragged him out with them, almost using force to do so, so he found himself in the cafeteria with the rest of them. He was listlessly pushing his food around on his plate more than eating anything, and his food was mostly cold when he noticed Woojin’s disapproving looks. He knew if he didn’t eat more, he’d have to listen to Woojin’s nagging later, and that was not something he wanted or needed today. Especially since he couldn’t avoid Woojin even if he wanted to. Woojin was the one person in the pack he never wanted to snap at, not after everything the older had done for him. Not that the others hadn’t, but Woojin was special in that regard.

It wasn’t Woojin’s nagging he should have been worried about, though. Once the others were all done eating and getting up to return to their dorms, it was Chan’s arm that looped around his shoulders, holding him back.

“Take a walk with me.” The alpha requested quietly, and Felix froze in his spot. Chan squeezed his arm comfortingly, rubbing his back once before letting go.

It was a request, not an order, but Felix wouldn’t have dared to refuse in that moment, even if he only wanted to go up to his room and hide in his bed for the rest of the day. Still, Felix watched wistfully as the other members gathered to go back to their dorm together while Chan held him back. Not physically, but it was all the same. Once they were out of sight, Chan steered them out the double glass doors leading to the courtyard behind the cafeteria, into the chilly winter evening air. It was dark outside, but there were enough lamps illuminating the walkways still.

“You know, my very own soulmate has banned me from our bedroom until I, and I quote ‘Pull my head out of my own ass.’ And while I am personally not a fan of the backaches I get from sleeping on the couches in the common area, I could live with them if I didn’t know Woojin feels them, too, through our bond. Still, he won’t give in, he’s stubborn like that, so here I am, pulling my head out of my ass. Tell me about Changbin.” Chan started, and Felix inhaled sharply, steps faltering.

“W-what do you want me to tell you?” Felix stammered, regaining his footing.

“I don’t know… I mean, I already know he’s your soulmate, I know how you met, what you’ve been up to before the situation the other day. I know he’s the runt of his family. But, I want to know more about him.”

Felix swallowed thickly.

“W-why?”

Chan stopped walking abruptly, forcing Felix to stop, too. What Felix didn’t expect was the gentle look in Chan’s eyes as he caught his gaze.

“Because he is your soulmate, and you are my family. And I care a lot about you, and your happiness, so it’s only natural I’d want to know more about the person your soul has connected with, right?”

Felix averted his gaze, blushing slightly.

“I-… I still don’t know what I should tell you. He’s… He’s in the same year I am, but he’s actually a year older. He’s incredibly smart, he excels in every subject, and he’s a very fast thinker. Fast learner, too. He’s smarter than I am, for sure, and he’s long since managed to outsmart me when we spar. He’s… He’s kind, considerate, and… he drives me crazy.” He shook his head, burying his face in his hands as his throat closed up, the pent-up emotions from the day crashing into him.

Warm arms came around him, pulling him into a tight hug, and Felix crumbled against Chan’s chest, the tears he hadn’t known had been looming so close under the surface breaking through. Chan just held him as he sobbed against the pack-alpha’s chest, making him feel safe despite also feeling so vulnerable, until he managed to pull himself together somewhat.

“I can’t lose him, hyung.” Felix choked, not looking up from where he was hiding against Chan’s chest. “I’ve barely gotten to know him yet, but I can’t lose him.”

Chan shushed him gently, carding a hand through his hair and still holding him close.

“Of course you can’t; he’s your soulmate.” The thought alone of being without his own soulmate was crippling enough that, had Chan not been holding Felix, he would have crumpled to the ground himself. “I would never ask you to leave him, Felix.”

For a moment, relief flooded Felix, but then another chilling thought rushed through him, freezing him from the inside out, and he tensed violently in Chan’s arms.

“H-hyung-… I… I don’t want to lose you, either! Please, I-…”

Chan’s hold tightened again.

“I’m not kicking you out of our pack, Felix, relax.”

Felix pushed out of Chan’s hold somewhat, though.

“Are you-… Are you going to make me choose?”

Chan’s expression flashed with hurt, darkening.

“What? Who do you take me for?! Of course not, what the hell?!”

Felix relaxed again, quickly growing tired from the rollercoaster of emotions he was going through.

“I… Sorry. I’m… I’m exhausted.” He apologized, and Chan wound only one arm around his shoulders again, resuming their walk through the night.

“You fought with him, earlier today.”

Felix wasn’t even surprised Chan knew about that anymore. He flinched slightly, though.

“Fighting is probably not the right word. He basically told me to back off because I was smothering him. I- I just wanted to make sure he’s safe and isn’t attacked by the assholes from his old pack again, and spend some time with him, but…”

He trailed off, and Chan hummed in understanding.

“When Woojin and I figured out we were soulmates, do you know what he did?”

Felix’ eyes widened, curious, since he’d never even considered there must have been a time when Chan and Woojin hadn’t been mates, soulmates, the powerful unit he knew them as. He shook his head, eyes wide as he observed Chan’s face.

“He blocked the bond, ran off, and tried to leave the country.”

Felix gasped, gaping at Chan, who chuckled fondly at the memory.

“The only reason I can say ‘tried’ and not ‘left’, is because he was held up at the border because he was an unaccompanied minor with no permission from an adult to travel out of the country.”

Chan shook his head fondly.

“He kept moving and hiding for close to three months. I almost went crazy during that time. I couldn’t sense anything through the bond, had no way of knowing if he was ok, if he was hurt, if he was even alive still. There was nothing. Then, when I was really reaching my limit and about to do something really fucking stupid that I am not going to disclose further, he called me. Just like that. And told me to stop being a fucking drama queen, before saying so much as hello.”

“He what?!” Felix almost shrieked, and Chan laughed.

“The Woojin you know is vastly different from the one I met when we were barely thirteen. It took another three months before he came back to our hometown. And I had to swear on our bond, almost daily, that I wouldn’t use our bond against him in any way before he did. I only almost made the mistake to interfere in one of Woojin’s affairs once without his invitation when we were fifteen, and let me just tell you, I will never make that mistake again.”

Felix shook his head slowly.

“You’re so whipped, hyung…”

Chan laughed, roughly disheveling Felix’ hair.

“So are you, pup!”

Felix smiled weakly, shrugging as he saw no reason to deny it. Chan sighed deeply, still smiling to himself.

“Anyway, why I’m telling you all this… Basically, us alphas, we are pretty much the single most stupid creatures on this planet. We think we are all that, the universal protectors and caretakers, but in reality… We’re really fucking dumb. And those of us who are lucky enough to find our soulmates, we are the dumbest of them all. I think that’s why fate makes sure we find our soulmates, so they can save us from ourselves.”

Felix huffed slightly.

“Speak for yourself…”

“Hey!” Chan pinched his side, making Felix squirm in his hold with a chuckle. “You are no better, pup! I heard your argument with Changbin earlier. You are as big of an idiot as I used to be. We can only hope Changbin is going to teach you some sense, finally.”

Felix’ face fell again at that, and a weary sigh left him.

“He’s pushing me away, though…”

Chan hummed disapprovingly.

“He’s not pushing you away. He’s teaching you to give space and forcing you to become an independent wolf while also not neglecting your relationships. Basically, he’s telling you to pull your head out of your own ass, too.”

Felix grimaced at the imagery, and Chan bit back a smile as he knew exactly what Felix was thinking about.

“I… I just don’t really get it, though. Why he’s being like that. He… He is so soft and vulnerable some times, and then the next, it’s like he grows an impenetrable shell and acts as if he has to fight the entire world off; and is determined to do it, on his own. I get that he’s been on his own pretty much all his life, but he doesn’t have to be anymore!”

Chan hummed understandingly.

“Old habits die hard, Felix. Him being a runt, he’s most likely never had any autonomy whatsoever, others dictating his whole life. Here, he’s experiencing a form of freedom he’s never had before. Even if it’s harsh sometimes, it’s still freedom, and you have to be careful, so you don’t make him feel like you’re taking away any of that freedom. When you try to protect him too much, he’ll most likely feel like you don’t believe in him, you don’t trust him, you see him as incompetent. And that’ll be when he grows that impenetrable shell.”

Felix gaped at that.

“But, I don’t…!”

“I’m sure you don’t. That doesn’t mean that it doesn’t come across like that sometimes. Let him teach you to what degree you can interfere, listen to him, give him the space he asks for. If you do that, I am sure he will learn to listen to your concerns as well.”

Felix focused mostly on the ground in front of his feet as they walked slowly, kicking at a pebble every now and then.

“He does listen to what I have to say. And he counter-argues to most of it in a way that I’m left with nothing to reply.”

Chan hummed understandingly.

“I know that feeling oh so well. That’s why I say we are the single most stupid creatures on the planet. We have a lot to learn. And you are only just starting. Believe me when I tell you it’s for the best, though.”

Felix found it hard, but if there was anyone who should know, it was Chan.

They eventually rounded the far side of the building, starting their way back to the middle where another set of doors to the inside was located.

“Chan… What is going to happen now, though?”  Felix eventually broke the silence that had stretched between them.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean… this whole situation. Changbin and me being soulmates, but me being in your pack, too. You said you’re not going to make me choose, but…”

“Ah, that. Well, for now, nothing.”

“Nothing?”

Chan nodded.

“Nothing. You’re not going to stop being Changbin’s soulmate, nor a member of the pack. Everything stays the way it is.”

Felix gave him an incredulous stare.

“But… it can’t stay like that forever, can it?”

Chan sighed.

“Forever is a really long time, Felix. Even one school year is a really long time, and this one is only just one third done. I can’t promise you anything right now but give it some time. Everything will sort itself out eventually.”

Felix grumbled incoherently under his breath, and Chan bumped his side affectionately.

“I get that you’re impatient, but have some faith in the true leader of this pack, ok?”

Felix gave him a questioning, slightly annoyed look, but Chan only answered him with an enigmatic smile as they went back inside the dorm wing and started climbing the stairs.

The comment made slightly more sense when they entered their own dorm, finding the common area empty except for Woojin, who greeted them with a carefully arched, commandeering eyebrow. It took him mere seconds of studying them before his expression smoothed over and regained a warmth Felix had been missing the past few days. He supposed Chan wouldn’t be spending another night on the couch, he mused as he slipped into his own room.

***

Changbin had felt a little bad about the way he’d sent Felix off the day before eventually, once he’d calmed down, but he felt a lot better now that they had met up for breakfast in the dining hall. Part of him had debated getting Felix to get them breakfast from the cafeteria to eat in his room, but then he had decided against it.

He had to admit, there was a certain charm to sitting in the crowded, loud place with Felix, yet while he was with him, it felt like they were in their own, personal bubble, where no one could interfere, none of the noise mattered, it was as if other people didn’t exist around them.

No one dared come disturb Changbin’s breakfast while he was with Felix, and Changbin completely missed the bitter, angry stares his old pack sent his way. Even if he had noticed them, he wouldn’t have cared, not in that moment. He was too busy enjoying his time with Felix before they would have to part to get to their classes, especially after the distance he’d put between them the night before. That distance melted like ice in the sun as they quietly conversed over breakfast, and any thought Changbin had had about possibly distressing Felix too much by asking for more space slowly dissipated with it.

Unfortunately, eventually there was one certain someone who didn’t keep their distance from them to leave them to their breakfast undisturbed.

Well, to be fair, they were pretty much done with actually eating when Chan seemingly materialized next to their table, but still, Changbin would have preferred a little bit more alone time with Felix. Not that he would ever have mentioned that to Chan!

Instead, he prepared to scoot back and get up as quietly as possible, hoping to be able to disappear without causing anyone any hassle and leave Felix and his pack-alpha to discuss whatever there was to discuss in peace.

The series of unfortunate events didn’t seem to have ended just yet for Changbin, though.

“Morning, Felix… Changbin. Oh, were the croissants good? I was too late to try them, I hope they make them more often from now on. Uh, Changbin, before you leave, actually… Your first class is Biology, right? I’m in the labs, too, this morning, I was hoping we could walk there together…”

Changbin froze in his spot, his stomach contracting and painfully attacking the food he’d just consumed from the sudden anxiousness.

“W-what?” He managed, breathless and quiet, and Felix hurried to send out comforting emotions through the bond.

“You want to walk with Changbin? Why?” Felix asked carefully, and Changbin was actually quite grateful Felix had decided to ask, saving him from having to do so. The pack-alpha intimidated him greatly, after all.

“Still in the process of pulling my head out of my ass, one could say…” Chan replied with a shrug that was supposed to seem nonchalant but turned out a little too stiff.

“Still? But you didn’t sleep on the couch again last night, did you?”

Chan shook his head.

“No, I was allowed back in my bed, thankfully. This arrangement can very well be of the temporary nature, though, I have been informed, and I would really like to restore it to permanent. Hence why I’m here.”

Changbin didn’t understand what exactly was going on, or what they were talking about, but he didn’t dare move away any further, staying frozen in place where Chan had stopped him with his words. He just hoped the food in his stomach would follow the example of the rest of his body and stay put, too.

“Alright. And having a chat with Changbin is going to help your agenda?”

“I sure hope it will.”

“And I’m assuming I am not invited to that chat?”

“You have a Social Studies class to attend all the way over on the other side of the Academy. I’m not going to let you skip for no good reason.”

Felix rolled his eyes, groaning.

“You two and your obsession with making sure I attend all my classes. You are the worst, both of you. I can already tell you are going to get along well, if only because you get to bond over bullying me into being a model student. Gah!”

Chan laughed heartily, and Changbin at least smiled, amused, at Felix’ words.

“Maybe like this we will be able to save your grades this year. You know the teachers will make you retake this year if you don’t get significantly better than last year; it was part of your deal. You promised to work harder!”

Felix groaned quietly but didn’t complain. Chan was right, after all.

“Alright, alright. I’m going. Will I see you at lunch?” The question was directed at Changbin, who nodded hesitantly, unsure if the action wouldn’t get him in trouble with Chan.

Felix rounded the table before going to hug Changbin quickly. He took the chance that they were close to whisper in Changbin’s ear, quiet enough that Chan must not have been able to hear it.

“I’m sure it will be fine. But whatever the outcome, know that I’m here for you!”

Changbin didn’t have time to answer before Felix stepped away from him, but he still managed to squeeze Felix’ hand, which had found its way into his own, shortly. They let go of each other reluctantly, but Felix really had to hurry to make it to class on time, and with his two major naggers in one place, he had no choice but to go.

Changbin really didn’t feel comfortable alone with Chan once Felix was gone, but he couldn’t very well avoid him. He could, however, avoid his gaze, and consequently missed the warm look the pack-alpha was giving him and Felix and that lingered even after Felix had left.

“You two have really grown close, huh?” Chan remarked quietly once Felix was out of sight.

Changbin bit his lip, nodding hesitantly in answer.

“It is to be expected, considering you are soulmates… It’s still sweet to see, though.”

Changbin didn’t really believe his ears, and he had to look up to glance at Chan to confirm the other had really just said that. Chan’s expression was still fond, though, so he assumed that it was entirely possible that he had indeed said that.

“We should get going, too.” Chan remarked, shaking his head, presumably to get it out of the clouds, and Changbin hurried to put his breakfast tray away, following Chan in the general direction of their next classes.

“You seem really nervous… I’m sorry. I didn’t ask to talk to you for any… unpleasant reason. I just want to get to know you better, since you are Felix’ soulmate. I’m not here to judge or scold you, and this is no trap or anything of the sorts.” Chan apologized eventually, after walking in silence for a moment.

Changbin gasped quietly, shaking his head.

“Ah, no, it’s- it’s ok, it’s just, uh-…” He was lost for words, unable to come up with an appropriate answer. Chan didn’t seem to need one, though.

“I am aware that we, me and my pack, haven’t been exactly welcoming to you and that kind of sucks from our part. Woojin and Jeongin have been making sure it’s impossible to doubt what their stance is regarding our behaviour as a pack towards you. And it sucks that I have to admit they are right.”

Changbin shook his head lightly, though.

“I didn’t- It’s ok, you don’t owe me anything… I’m not part of your pack, so I’m not part of your business, I get it.”

Chan hummed in disagreement, though.

“Jeongin especially would firmly disagree with you on the first part of what you just said, and had _I_ said the second part within earshot of my mate, I would be right back to sleeping on the couch. And actually, since it turned out that you are Felix’ soulmate, you kind of are part of ‘our business’, now.”

Changbin paled considerably at that, his steps faltering. Chan, in turn, paled, too, backtracking hastily.

“Oh, shit, that sounded so wrong! Listen, I- I don’t have anything against you being Felix’ soulmate; actually, I am really glad Felix found you. I think you will be really good for him… And he could be really good for you, I’m sure. Well, of course you’ll be perfect for each other, you’re soulmates. And I’m rambling. I’m sorry. Wow, I suck at this…”

Changbin, somewhat calmed through Chan’s words, watched him with a funny expression as the pack alpha shook his head at himself, rubbed a hand over his face, bit his lip, and then proceeded to shake his head again. If he didn’t know better, he’d say the alpha was nervous.

Just as the thought formed in his mind, Chan focused on him again, cocking his head and giving him a tired, resigned smile.

“I must be leaving quite the impression on you, huh?” He chuckled softly. Changbin spluttered once again, shaking his head frantically.

“N-no- I mean, ah, it’s-….”

Chan chuckled again, but it wasn’t a comfortable chuckle.

“It’s ok. I’m aware I’m a mess right now. I’m kind of embarrassed, to be honest, and quite full of regrets. I’ve consciously ignored you in a time of need despite knowing you needed the help I could have provided, because I was too focused on wanting to protect my own pack; just to find out later you are a fated soulmate to one of the people I swore to love and protect with my life. My actions, or lack of action, damn near could have cost Felix, and you, the greatest gift life has to give for one of our kind. It’s… it’s really putting things into perspective for me, now, but it’s also a bit disorienting, to be honest.”

Changbin blushed faintly, his gaze averted to the floor and the steps they were climbing.

“Well, to be fair, you didn’t know Felix and I were soulmates. We didn’t know, either, until the other day, when I got in trouble again.”

Chan hummed in denial, shaking his head.

“My very own soulmate knew what was going on between you and Felix, way before you two knew. I could have known, too, if I had paid the attention I should have. Everything I needed to figure it out was right there under my nose. Besides, Felix’ soulmate or not, leaving you to fend for yourself in your situation was a shitty thing to do, either way. And I want to sincerely apologize for that.”

“It’s ok… But thank you, I guess. I understand, though. You have a family to take care of. You can’t just go around and take in every stray you come across…”

Chan chuckled, and there was a note to it that made Changbin look up, just to find Chan’s expression lit up with amusement.

“Actually… My family, my pack… And me, too, if we’re being technical… We were all strays at some point. Strays that stayed together, eventually, one by one. So, yes, I could have gone and taken you in, if I hadn’t been too stuck up.”

Chan sighed deeply, pausing as they reached the bustling hallway lined by the labs they would have their classes in. Changbin stopped, too, and Chan continued speaking.

“As you can probably tell, I have been doing a lot of thinking about this. Being banned to the couch at night has that kind of effect, apparently. And while I am thankful that you are trying to offer me excuses for my behaviour, which is very kind of you, the sad truth is: there is no excuse. Trust me, I’ve tried to come up with every single imaginable one, and have either found the fault in them myself, or have had it pointed out to me. And that’s ok, I’ve accepted it, and am learning to live with it and making amends. Which is what led me to ask you to walk to class with me, because I wanted to get to know you better. And instead of learning about you, I’ve spent all this time talking about myself, basically. I would still like to talk to you, and get to know more about you, though. How about we meet up at some point later when you have more time?”

Changbin found himself not uninclined to agree to that proposal, to his own surprise.

“I have a free period before lunch…”

Chan’s eyes lit up and he beamed at him.

“I don’t, but I can change that. But don’t let Felix know, he’s never going to listen to me ever again when I tell him not to skip if he knows I did!”

Changbin chuckled, shaking his head softly.

“I won’t tell him, don’t worry. I want him to stop skipping classes all the time, too.”

“I am so glad you seem to be a bright, responsible kid, Changbin. Now, uh, should we meet up near your classroom for your free period? Or somewhere else?”

Changbin shrugged slightly.

“What about the canteen?”

Despite how friendly Chan seemed to be, Changbin didn’t want to risk getting stuck in barely travelled hallways with him later.

“Sounds good to me.”

The bell rang for class, and after a rather hasty goodbye, both disappeared in their designated labs.

 


	11. Chapter 11 - The Mark of a Runt (Part 1)

Chapter 11

Felix couldn’t feel anything distressing coming from Changbin, and he did trust Chan, but he couldn’t help but be nervous about how their talk had gone. Lunch couldn’t come quick enough for him, and when it did, he nearly flew down the hallways and stairs to the cafeteria, where he was expecting to meet Changbin.

What he didn’t expect was to meet both Changbin and Chan there, sitting there huddled together as they looked at something Chan was showing the other in his notebook.

“…So, yeah, this is the kind of style I usually write in. It just fits what I usually compose best. I can show you a few finished pieces sometime, if you want.”

“I’d like that, if you’re ok sharing that. I mean, it seems like they’d be pretty personal…”

“Yeah no, that’s fine. I mean, I made them to be heard, after all, not to gain mold forgotten in a folder somewhere.”

Felix frowned, confused about what they could be talking about as he reached the table the two were sitting at.

“Hi, friends…” He awkwardly tried to catch their attention. It worked, both wolves looking up at him, greeting him with two different kinds of smiles. Changbin’s was soft, welcoming, but Chan’s was teasing.

“Friends? Really?”

Felix snorted, opting to sit down next to Changbin, rather than next to Chan and opposite Changbin.

“For the last time, I’m not calling you ‘dad’, Chan…”

Changbin nearly choked, his eyes widening as clearly a million thoughts and questions exploded in his mind, but Chan only fake-gasped.

“You wound me!”

“What the-…”

Felix waved Changbin’s question off before he had time to finish it.

“Ignore him. Chan has daddy issues.”

Changbin decidedly looked like ignoring that was the last thing he’d find himself able to do, especially since Chan didn’t keep quiet about Felix’ interjection.

“Hey, you brat! Watch what kind of lies and slander you spread about your pack-alpha, would you?!”

Felix chuckled, not at all phased.

“Chan likes to act like kind of a father figure to us, even if he’s not that much older. Personally, I think he’s just doing it so he can make use of the vast collection of lame dad-jokes he’s compiled over the years.”

“I’m right here and can hear you, you are aware of that, right?”

Felix beamed at Chan.

“I am so glad you can hear, still, gramps. I heard hearing aids are expensive, not sure we could afford those for you yet!”

Chan glared at Felix, but eventually decided to get up, grabbing his things from the table with a shake of his head.

“Kids these days have zero respect… And here I thought we’d raised you better! Woojin is going to be so disappointed…”

“I would never disrespect Woojin, though. I love him, after all!”

Chan glared at Felix, but it wasn’t serious.

“You’re lucky he loves you, too, and won’t allow me to beat your sorry ass up like you deserve until you learn some respect, punk!”

Felix grinned proudly, pulling a cute face in flower pose.

“Perks of being a mama’s boy!”

Chan grumbled something unintelligible, sighing when he was done gathering his things, but then gave both Felix and Changbin a warm smile.

“I’m going to go ahead and see if I can get some work done before afternoon classes start. Have fun, you two!” He waved shortly, and then ambled off, quickly swallowed by the crowd.

Felix stared after him a moment longer, even when he was already gone from his view, before turning back to Changbin.

“You two got along well, I see…”

Changbin shifted in his seat, trying to get more comfortable, and shrugged.

“He’s… He’s not at all like what I came to expect from pack-alphas, to be honest…”

Felix tilted his head curiously.

“Is that a good or a bad thing?”

“A good thing, definitely good! He’s… He listens, like he’s genuinely interested in the answer to his questions, even if they seem trivial. He doesn’t think he’s perfect. He’s understanding and admits his shortcomings and works to become better. That’s all things I’ve never seen in a pack-alpha before…”

Felix hummed, more serious now than he’d been before due to the playful banter with Chan.

“The pack-alphas you had to deal with until now are pretty much scum, then. But I have to agree with you, a lot of pack alphas are downright horrible, and Chan is _so_ not. He’s not perfect, but he’s as close as a pack alpha can probably come to perfect.”

Changbin nodded absentmindedly, shifting again, and Felix caught up on his restlessness.

“What’s bothering you?” He asked softly, and Changbin stilled, looking up at him shyly.

“It’s not so much bothering, but… Chan invited me to eat dinner with your pack some time. All of you. I… I’m not sure that’s a good idea. It’s freaking me out a bit.”

Felix hummed in understanding.

“That makes sense. I mean, the others have been getting curious about you, now that… That they found out about us. But you should be fine. The only ones who are still more reserved at this point are Minho and Jisung. But I suspect on Jisung’s part that’s mostly because… We are very close, and I think he might be scared that he’s going to lose me because of you. And Minho… Minho is just super protective of Jisung. If he believes something, or someone, is causing Jisung any distress at all, he’s ready to fight.”

Changbin nodded slowly.

“That’s pretty much what Chan told me, too… I can’t help that I’m kind of terrified of them, though.”

“You don’t have to accept the invitation, Changbin. It’s an invitation, not an order. Chan will understand, just like I do. And if you do decide you want to accept, know that I’ll always be here for you, by your side. It’s not like you’ll be surrounded by enemies, either; Chan, Woojin, Seungmin and Jeongin are already ok with you and just want to get to know you. I’m sure Hyunjin will easily fall for your charms, too.”

Changbin swallowed thickly.

“Maybe, one day… Maybe.”

“There’s no pressure, Bin. It’s ok to take your time.”

***

The subject was dropped, and neither Felix or Chan brought it up again. Changbin thought about it, often, though, but he couldn’t make a decision just yet. He was able to confirm Felix had been right about the pack members that seemed to have taken a liking to him already, though. Frequently, when he passed Woojin, Seungmin or Jeongin in the hallways, they greeted him. Sometimes it was a hi or hello, other times just a meeting of gazes and nod of their head, and from Jeongin, a bright smile most days.

He also found he shared a free period with Chan, and the two spent it together. Changbin learned a lot about the pack and their dynamics from Chan, as well as things about Felix he wouldn’t have suspected; mostly embarrassing things from when Felix was still a little brat, shortly after Chan and Woojin had picked him off the streets.

However, it was the day that Hyunjin greeted him with a nod when he entered the classroom, acknowledging him for the first time since they shared that class, that Changbin decided that maybe yes, maybe he could accept the invitation for dinner with the pack. He’d have to talk about it again with Chan, but maybe he would be ok.

So, the next time he shared a free period with Chan, and he wasn’t cooped up with one of his other pack mates, he decided to bring up the subject.

“You mentioned a while back that I should come eat dinner with you guys some time…”

Chan perked up at that.

“Yes, absolutely! Are you saying you accept the invitation?”

Changbin shook his head, and Chan’s face fell, looking genuinely sad.

“Ah, I’m not sure yet! I was wondering… What did you have in mind for that gathering?”

“Oh… Uh, I was thinking I’d raid the buffet and we could eat in our dorm. Since that’s more comfortable to hang out as a group than out here where everyone else is around and prying. It’s safer for you, too.”

Changbin nodded slowly, hesitant, still. But Chan was right, that was the most comfortable and safe option. And even if Minho and Jisung didn’t like him, he trusted Felix -and Chan, too- that they wouldn’t let anything get out of hand. He was probably safer in their dorm than anywhere else in the Academy.

“If I agreed, when would we do this?”

Chan could barely sit still, jumping a little in his seat and Changbin suspected he was holding back an excited squeal, judging from the blinding smile lighting up his face.

“Anytime you want. Tonight even, if that’s ok with you!”

Changbin’s eyes widened and he spluttered a little, but then caught himself.

“Ok...”

If he didn’t agree to that now, he would find a way to talk himself out of it again. And if they didn’t do it as soon as possible, he might go find his old pack on purpose so they could knock him out to have a valid excuse not to show up.

“Yes! I’ll let the others know! They have been _dying_ to really meet you, you know!”

Changbin hummed noncommittally, wondering how true that statement could really be.

“You are in the same class as Felix for last period today, right?”

Changbin shook his head, tuning in to what Chan was saying.

“Huh? Yes, why?”

“Just checking. We have a bit of clean-up to do before we can let anyone into our dorm in good faith, but if you hang out with Felix after classes I can let you know through him when we’re ready to have you over.”

“Oh… You don’t have to go all out and clean to have me over, though…”

“We absolutely do! The dorm looks like a pig-pen, and this is a really good occasion to get the kids off their asses and motivated to clean their shit up. Trust me, if you came in right now, you’d walk right back out after taking two steps inside. At least that’s what I feel tempted to do! Actually, I should probably go and get a headstart, or else we’ll have to postpone dinner until tomorrow…”

Changbin wanted to protest, but Chan was faster, bidding him goodbye quickly. For safety reasons, Changbin holed up in his room until the next class was supposed to start. The rest of the day, he spent with a heavy lump in his stomach, until at some point a reassuring feeling of warmth pushed into his consciousness. It was Felix, who was most likely feeling Changbin’s anxiousness and tried his best to help him.

Changbin lowered his head, feigning a vested interest in the book in front of him in class to hide the fond smile that thoughts of Felix and his kindness regularly elicited from him.

Eventually, the last class of the day came and went, and he joined Felix by the door as it let out.

“We’re still banned from the dorm, Chan has everyone cleaning absolutely everything, pore deep. Seungmin is living.”

“Why? Does he hate it that much?”

“ _Living,_ not livid. Seungmin is a hundred percent done with all of us for being so dirty and leaving all our shit everywhere. He’s going to love you forever for being the reason everyone is forced to clean up after themselves for once.”

Changbin nodded in understanding, biting his lip quietly, though. He just hoped that the others wouldn’t in turn hate him forever for getting them forced to clean up.

He was pulled out of his thoughts by Felix cupping his face in his hand, gently pulling his bottom lip out from between his teeth with his thumb.

“Hey, it’s going to be ok. No one is going to hate you. You’re fine.”

His eyes fluttered up to Felix, who was giving him a reassuring smile. It wasn’t so much the reassuring nature of the smile that had Changbin lose track of any and all thoughts in his mind as he kept looking up at Felix, entranced, like so often, by his whole being.

“You are absolutely stunning, you know that?”

Changbin didn’t know where the words came from, and he was as surprised to hear them as Felix, who chuckled breathlessly, a becoming blush dusting his cheeks.

“W-why, thank you. So are you, you know.”

Changbin averted his gaze, but before he had time to be embarrassed, Felix laughed and pulled him into his arms. And fitting against Felix’ chest like that, he had other things on his mind than getting embarrassed.

“Shall we go to your room while we wait for the ok to go over?”

Changbin hummed, prolonging the moment of cuddling Felix for just that little bit longer before he reluctantly stepped back.

“We can cuddle there, too.” Felix suggested, and Changbin all but dragged Felix with him as he turned and led the way, suddenly feeling an urgent need to get there as fast as possible.

They stumbled into Changbin’s room, kicking the door shut with a breathless laugh on Felix’ lips that was soon extinguished as their lips connected.

Felix hummed contently. Changbin could be quite the aggressive kisser when he was in the mood for it, and he loved every moment of it. He felt almost vulnerable under those kisses, in a way he would never have thought he’d appreciate, never mind crave.

He let Changbin push him towards the bed, not resisting the fall back onto the mattress and welcoming Changbin into his arms again as he followed him.

Changbin stopped for a moment, half propped up with his arms on either side of Felix, to take in the sight of the other underneath him, pliant, waiting, giving him a look that was scorching with hunger and-… Changbin didn’t dare finish that though, instead delving down to claim Felix’ lips again.

The nature of the kiss was different this time, filled with longing and a need for an answer to a question that was never asked, rather than the almost desperate hunger that had coloured the one before. Felix was very aware of the change, and instead of letting Changbin have his way with him like he did before, he responded to the kiss in kind, answering the unspoken question despite not understanding neither the question nor the answer, until Changbin broke the kiss, panting.

His head fell heavily against Felix’ chest as he caught his breath, his muscles relaxing as he gave up on trying to hold himself up above Felix and allowed himself to rest on top of him. Felix’ arms came up to circle around him, pulling his smaller frame against him, and Changbin melted into the embrace.

“Better?” Felix questioned softly, but he got no answer for Changbin, who just lay there, face buried against Felix’ chest.

Only when both of them had caught their breaths again did Changbin move in Felix’ hold.

“I want to skip tonight.”

Felix looked down questioningly at Changbin, but he still couldn’t see his face.

“Ok…” he ventured, a silent question in the one word. Apparently, it was the wrong answer, though, since Changbin shifted again, hitting Felix’ shoulder lightly.

“Not ok! You’re not supposed to let me skip, you’re supposed to convince me to go!”

Felix chuckled, noticing the pout in Changbin’s voice even though he couldn’t see his face. That was something he had to change, and quickly, though. So, he unwound one arm from around Changbin to find his chin and tilt his head up until their eyes met.

“Tell me why you want to skip, and why you want me to not let you skip.”

Changbin huffed, avoiding Felix’ gaze even though Felix didn’t let go of his face.

“I want to skip because I’m a coward, and I don’t want you to let me skip because I don’t want anyone but you to know how much of a coward I actually am.”

Felix hummed, discontent.

“You’re not a coward, Changbin. What is it that’s scaring you? You can tell me.”

Changbin’s eyes fluttered shut and he swallowed thickly. It took a moment before he answered.

“I’m a runt, Felix. I’m not supposed to be liked, that’s what I’ve been taught all my life. I’m scared your pack will realize that, too, and so will you, through them if not on your own.”

Felix’s heart broke for Changbin, and he was sure the pain was intense enough for Changbin to feel it, too, through the bond. A single tear fell from Changbin’s closed eyes, and Felix wiped it away with his thumb.

“Oh, Binnie… I… I don’t know what to say to make you believe that isn’t going to happen. I…” Felix shook his head softly, at himself as well as Changbin. With a sigh, he propped himself up, struggling himself into an upright position without letting go of Changbin and helping the other readjust in his lap once he’d finally managed.

“You know what I think? Truly think, about the fact you’re a runt?” He almost whispered, nuzzling against Changbin’s head as he asked. Changbin didn’t answer, but he tensed in Felix’ hold, which only prompted Felix into holding him tighter.

“I think it says more about your mother than you, Bin. You were a little pup when she marked you, a _baby_ , for crying out loud. There is nothing you could have done by then that warrants what she did to you. You were completely innocent back then, and just as innocent throughout your whole life. It is not your fault that she did what she did, and how she treated you. How she made your family treat you. That is all on her. Not on you. And it is you who I love, who I care about, and whose thoughts I care about. Not those of some random, judgmental bitch I never even met, and never plan to meet.”

Silent tears were falling more steadily down Changbin’s face, and Felix couldn’t wipe them all away. Changbin turned to hide his face against Felix’ shoulder, since the younger gave no indication that he was going to let go of him any time soon so he could hide somewhere else.

“How can you say that, though? How can you be so sure?” He whispered through his tears, and Felix carded his fingers through his hair softly as Changbin soaked his shirt.

“Because I see you, Changbin. I feel you. All of you. You are my soulmate. You are the one person in the whole world my soul recognizes as its partner, its equal, its perfect fit. We are opposites where we have to be and equals where it matters. You are perfect in every way I can imagine, and some ways I can’t comprehend yet. It’s unfathomable to me how anyone could _not_ see that, when it is so obvious to me. There is no way anyone’s opinion of you can taint mine. And you being a runt is merely an opinion, too. An opinion of someone I don’t care about in the slightest.”

Changbin turned his head slightly to wipe at his face, trying to dry his tears while Felix kept carding his fingers through Changbin’s hair. He desperately wanted to believe Felix; in fact, he didn’t know how he could doubt him at all, feeling the sincerity in every single one of his words and actions over the bond, but somehow, he still managed to not fully believe him. Still, his words managed to calm him down for now, and he pulled back eventually, sheepishly avoiding Felix’ gaze. Felix would have none of that, though, cupping his face and bringing him in for a soft, sweet kiss. It was short yet unhurried, and it eased Changbin’s heart further, for the moment.

“You need a dry shirt…” he mumbled, avoiding the previous subject altogether to not break down again, smoothing over the spot on Felix’ shoulder that was damp from his tears. Felix hummed.

“So do you. Your sleeves are soaked.”

Felix was right, of course, and Changbin clambered out of his lap, going over to the dresser to find shirts for both Felix and him.

“I think this one should fit you…” He handed Felix a sweater that would clearly be too big on Changbin. Felix changed quickly, finding it was too big on himself, too, but it was ok. It was comfortable.

Clearly, Changbin didn’t think the same about the shirt he’d chosen for himself, taking it off again after only just having put it on and continuing to dig through his dresser. Him standing shirtless with his back to Felix, gave Felix a good view of the mark sitting high on his back.

It looked vicious, truly. If Felix tried, he could count exactly how many teeth -fangs- had pierced Changbin’s skin, ready to tear through his spine, crush the bones and sever the nerves, ending Changbin’s life before it had even truly begun.

The thought tore painfully through Felix, and before he knew what he was doing he got up and closed the distance between them, hugging Changbin tightly from behind. His cheek came to rest directly against the scar as he did so, but he didn’t flinch away as his skin made contact with the unnaturally smooth skin of the scar covering the hardened, deformed muscles underneath.

“F-Felix?” Changbin stuttered, surprised by the sudden tight embrace. He tensed for a second, fully expecting Felix to recoil from the scar on his back, but when he didn’t, he went soft in his arms again. “Felix, what’s wrong?”

“I just realized… How close I came to losing you, before- before I was even _born_!”

Changbin swallowed thickly.

“Felix…”

Felix turned his head, brushing a soft kiss right against the center of the scar, before leaning his cheek back against it.

“Hmm?”

“N-nothing…” Whatever he’d wanted to say fled his mind the instant Felix’ lips brushed against the deformed skin on his back.

Felix sighed deeply, stepping back eventually, albeit reluctantly.

“The others are done cleaning the dorm and Chan and Jeongin are on their way back up with the food. I supposed that’s meant to tell us we should head over soon.”

Changbin nodded as if on autopilot, pulling the next best shirt over his head. He didn’t care how it looked, this time around, his mind still focused on the tingling feeling Felix’ lips had left on the mark. The mark of a runt. Which failed its purpose to inspire disgust and contempt in Felix, and instead prompted him to hold him close.

He took a shuddering breath, but it did nothing against the buzzing inside him. Not that he wanted it to.

“Ok. Let’s go.” 


	12. Chapter 12 - The Mark of a Runt (Part 2)

Changbin and Felix arrived at the door to the pack’s dorm just as Chan was about to close the door behind him and Jeongin. Felix sprinted ahead, holding it open just seconds before Chan could close it.

“Ah, you’re here! Come in!”

Further down in the dorm, Jeongin was already putting down the containers he had been carrying.

“They had fried chicken tonight, and we managed to snag enough that there should be some left over for the rest of us once Woojin hyung is done with it!” The youngest announced, getting excited whoops as answer and an indignant “Hey!” from Woojin, followed by a series of laughs.

“Oh, and there we have the sneaky who managed to avoid having to clean with us! Just so you know, we just threw all your stuff into your room. You can clean that up yourself!” Jisung greeted Felix when they stepped into the common area.

Felix paled slightly, moving to check his room quickly.

“Hey, I was excused! It’s mostly you, anyway, who leaves their shit everywhere, not me. What the-” He gaped as he looked into his room. It was a mess, with clothes, books and other things strewn all over the floor, truly as if they had just been blindly thrown into the room. “Jisung, you ass, half of those are your clothes anyway!”

“Are not! They used to be mine, but you wore them last!”

“They’re still yours!”

“Are not!”

“Yes, they are!”

“Are not!”

“Are!”

Felix let go of his door, sprinting into the room to tackle Jisung to the floor.

“They are!”

Changbin flinched, flashbacks to the ‘playfights’ in his old pack playing in his mind. Jisung squealing in laughter ended the flashback, though, and he realized Felix was tickling him, not hurting him. Jisung squirmed, thrashing about wildly and almost kicking the food containers Jeongin and Hyunjin were setting up.

“Hey! Careful with the food, you mutts! Stop fighting!” Jeongin yelled. To Changbin’s surprise, no one seemed to take offense to the youngest taking that tone, and Jisung and Felix actually stopped their fight to sit up.

“Changbin, you can come sit over here. Do you know everyone’s faces and names already?” Seungmin waved him over, indicating a spot on the couch next to him.

Changbin unfroze from where he’d stood rooted to the spot by the entrance to the common area and made his way over to the couch. As soon as he sat down, Felix joined him to sit on his other side.

“Uh, yeah, I do… Felix talks a lot about you…”

Seungmin beamed.

“That’s great. We all know your name already, too, so that saves us awkward introductions. Do you like chicken?”

Changbin felt like he was going to get whiplash from the rapid changes of subject soon.

“Y-yeah.”

“That’s too bad, chicken is always the most coveted food when we eat together, and there is never enough because _someone_ always eats all of it before anyone else has the chance to even realize there _is_ any chicken!”

Changbin had a feeling he was talking deliberately loudly so the ‘someone’ would most definitely hear it. It worked, as Woojin gave Seungmin a scathing glare that made Changbin cower instead.

“Lies and slander! I always share!”

Noises of mocking disbelief answered him, and Chan patted his back comfortingly as he sat down beside him.

“It’s ok, love. We love you despite your non-chicken-sharing ways.”

“Speak for yourself. If you didn’t act like an overgrown guard-dog sleeping next to him, I’d already have murdered Woojin-hyung in his sleep to finally get to eat some chicken, too.” Minho muttered, earning a few laughs. Chan had to hold onto Woojin to keep him from launching over the coffee table to jump on Minho. Seeing his original intent thwarted, Woojin opted to grab the container with the chicken, extending it to Changbin to offer him some instead.

“Here, Changbin, take some. Don’t listen to these heathens’ lies; I _do_ share!”

Changbin hesitated, though, unsure if he should really accept the offer.

“You’re not fooling anyone, hyung!”

“That’s blatant favoritism!”

“Chan! Do something!”

Woojin rolled his eyes, but it became clear to even Changbin that it was done fondly, and he finally reached to take a piece of the offered chicken.

“Hyung, I carried all the food up here and made sure to choose the largest drumsticks just for you! _Pleeeease,_ can I have a piece, too?”

Woojin’s eyes flickered to Jeongin, who was giving him the most pleading look, and he was nothing but not weak for the youngest, so he extended the container to him, too. Jeongin’s eyes lit up as he chose a piece of chicken for himself.

“Hyung, I’m your favourite, am I not? I always listen the best to what you tell us to do, right? I even cleaned the bathtub today!” Jisung tried, too, but Woojin glared at him.

“Yeah, nah. Felix is my favourite. Here, Felix, have some chicken!”

Jisung wailed, while Felix laughed and took a piece of chicken before Woojin could change his mind.

“The rest of you can starve- Hey!” Woojin glared at Chan, who’d snatched a piece of chicken by reaching around him. He made no move to take it back but kept glaring as Chan bit into the drumstick with a wide grin on his face. His expression became worried as he eyed the over half-empty container in his hands, clearly becoming worried by how little was left in it.

“Aww, love, don’t worry. You can have the rest of that, because…” He reached to the packed coffee table, taking out another container that, upon being opened, turned out to be filled with even more chicken. “There’s enough for everyone!”

Woojin visibly sagged with relief, cradling the container he was already holding to himself while the others, until then chicken-less, dove for the table to get pieces for themselves. Changbin found himself leaning closer to Felix, out of the way, and Felix accommodated him against his side.

“You’ll get used to it.” He chuckled softly, but Changbin wasn’t so sure.

The ruckus died down quickly, though, as everyone was busy eating and focused on the food. The chicken was gone first, as expected at that point, but even Changbin managed to get seconds on that (thanks to Felix). There were plenty of other food options, though, and Changbin was sure no one would have to go to sleep hungry later on.

As the rests of food began to disappear, the conversations picked up again.

“Changbin, you’re a hyung, too, aren’t you? Can I call you hyung?” Jeongin addressed him eventually. Changbin wasn’t sure what he should answer, but no one seemed to pay particular attention to what he would have to answer, so he nodded.

“I’m a year older than Felix, so, I suppose? You can call me whatever you want, though.”

“You are? How come you are in our year? Your grades are great, though, so you didn’t fail a year, did you?” Hyunjin piped up.

“No, I started a year later than I was supposed to.”

“Ah, ok.” Hyunjin nodded, going back to finishing the last of his food. He looked one step away from licking his plate, and Seungmin elbowed him in his ribs.

“Isn’t that enough already? I swear, if you lick that plate next I’m making you sleep on the floor tonight.”

“I’m not sure that is an effective threat, Minnie. Earlier when I came back from class and went to look for him, he was laying on the floor, fully shifted, on his back with all four up, sleeping like a pup.” Jisung chuckled.

“Like you don’t do the same. You love rolling around on the floor in wolf form, too.” Minho interjected, and Jisung shrugged.

“I never said I didn’t; unlike Jinnie.”

“I don’t normally like it. My back was feeling funny earlier, though, and laying like that helped!”

“You’re all so spoiled. With a bit of getting used to, sleeping on the floor in wolf form is really comfortable.” Chan remarked, just to be shot down by Minho.

“You only say that because you have no choice with how often Woojin kicks you out of bed in his sleep. And you’re too whipped to wake him up when he does.”

“I don’t kick him out! Chan likes sleeping in wolf form, and it’s bad for our backs to sleep on surfaces that are too soft in that form. He sleeps on the floor by choice!”

“I don’t get how all of you can spend so much time in your wolf forms, anyway. Other than for running, it feels so _weird_.”

“You’ll get the appeal sometime, Innie. Just wait until you’re fully grown into it.” Woojin reassured the younger as he got up to start gathering all the clean chicken bones in one container to dispose of later.

“Do you shift, Changbin?” Chan asked, casually, and as always when he was being addressed directly, Changbin jumped a little.

“N-not that often…” He admitted, rather quietly.

“But you can?”

“Yeah.”

“What do you look like in wolf form?” Seungmin asked, giving him a curious once over.

Changbin shifted in his seat, a little uncomfortable under all the attention.

“Uh… Mostly black, with some grey.”

“So, like Minho-hyung?”

Changbin glanced quickly at Minho, trying to remember if he’d ever seen him in his wolf form. He couldn’t help but miss the carefully crafted unreadable expression on Minho’s face as he glanced at him, and he averted his gaze quickly again.

“I don’t know…”

“Minho has like, a lighter face, neck and front of his chest.” Felix supplied.

“Ah… No, my face is completely black. It’s more… Just my stomach and chest that are grey. And the inside of the top of my legs.”

“Cool! So, you basically look all black from afar?” Jeongin wondered.

“I think so.”

“Can you show us?” Minho asked, head tilted slightly, and Changbin tensed, holding his breath. He didn’t really want to. He wasn’t proud of his wolf form; while he was of a smaller frame in human form already, his wolf form would be even smaller compared to the others in the room. He was sure Felix’ wolf form would dwarf him, and next to Chan, he’d most likely look like a pup, still.

“Yeah, no, no one is shifting tonight! We just cleaned this whole place, I want to keep it clean and without fur on every single surface for at least twenty-four hours, please and thank you!” Woojin interfered, thankfully, and Changbin was able to release his breath. His eyes met Woojin’s briefly, and there was something in Woojin’s gaze that made him believe that that was a made-up excuse for his benefit, and not because Woojin actually cared about fur everywhere.

“Agreed. I still vote we don’t shift in the dorms at all. Especially since most of you seem to be allergic to grooming _and_ airing out this place.” Seungmin grumbled, and Jeongin nodded enthusiastically.

“Yeah. It smells like a dog house in here most days.”

“Nah, that’s just your room.”

“I don’t even shift in my room!”

“ _You_ don’t. But your room is the warmest, so we like to go there to dry up when we’ve been rained on.”

“Rat us out, why don’t you, Hyunjin?!”

Jeongin wailed, throwing himself against Chan’s side.

“Hyuuuung, I want a lock on my door!”

“Me too! I swear I’ll pay you back for the mess you guys made in my room.” Felix muttered, glaring specifically at Jisung.

The conversation shifted back and forth, going from one topic to the next quickly amidst cleaning up the remains of their meal. Changbin loosened up gradually, feeling more at ease as he was naturally included in the conversations about more harmless topics such as favourite (and least favourite) classes, teachers, drinks and desserts, books and music.

Once dessert was finished, too, a comfortable lull fell over the conversations. Changbin felt sleepy, and while he didn’t feel comfortable enough to start dozing away like Hyunjin or Jeongin were well on their way to, he had relaxed enough to practically sag against Felix’ side, who didn’t seem to have a problem with holding both his and Changbin’s weight up. The peace didn’t last long, though.

“So, Changbin… I’ve been wondering, is it really true you are a marked runt?” Minho’s voice cut through the momentary silence. It wasn’t loud, but the meaning of the words served like a bucket of ice water dousing everyone in the room, including those that were already half asleep.

“Minho!”

“What the fuck, Minho!”

Changbin flinched, along with both Felix and Seungmin next to him, and probably more of the others at the curse slipping over Woojin’s lips. It seemed wrong, hearing him curse, and the glare with which he fixed Minho looked out of place, too. It only made it more terrifying.

Minho, contrary to the others in the room, seemed unaffected by it, though. His gaze remained fixed on Changbin, who wanted to shrink under it, but didn’t only thanks to Felix’ arm that had curled around him protectively.

Changbin swallowed thickly. This was it. He had known this moment would come eventually, and while he suspected that the pack already knew, or at least suspected his nature, he’d hoped he could avoid the subject for a while longer. Now, there was no turning back, though. He straightened a little, meeting Minho’s gaze across the room head on.

“Yes. It is true.”

“Really? Can you show us?”

 “What the ever-loving hell is wrong with you?!” Woojin’s voice sounded almost shrill, and this time Chan didn’t hold him back as he got up, looking ready to launch over the table and at Minho. Instead, he looked ready to get up, too, but for now resorted to a low growl from where he was barely sitting on his couch, still.

“That’s enough!”

 “You don’t get to ask that of him!” Felix growled, too, his hold on Changbin tightening.

Changbin exhaled slowly, his head swimming. There was only one way to handle this situation, though. And it was up to him to do it, he couldn’t rely on any of the others to do it for him.

“It’s ok.” He managed to say, his voice sounding calm, serene, even if that was the last thing he truly felt. All eyes turned to him, but it was Woojin’s gaze that stuck out to Changbin.

“You don’t have to show anyone anything, Changbin. Minho has the brain of an extra insensitive amoeba, just ignore him.” There was a fiery agony behind his words that mirrored the look in his eyes, but strangely, it reassured Changbin.

“It’s really, ok. I don’t mind, if this is what it takes for everyone to believe me.”

The room became so silent you could hear the dust settle, and Changbin scooted away from Felix just so, barely enough to be able to turn around far enough to show his back to the room. Like he’d done all that while back with Felix, he grabbed the hem of his shirt and tugged down, exposing the nasty scar high on his back.

Several sharp breaths were taken in, and a gasp or two rang out, too. Changbin let go of his shirt, shrugging to get it to cover his back again and turned back around. He was met with shocked, sometimes pained gazes, while Chan was covering Jeongin’s eyes with his hands. Not that he needed to, Changbin could tell the pup had his eyes squeezed shut anyway.

“Shit, I’m sorry, I didn’t think-…”

“Yeah, that was quite obvious.” Woojin hissed, shutting Minho’s quiet, sheepish apology down angrily.

Changbin bit his lip, leaning against Felix’ side again. Felix’ hands were shaking as he busied himself with pulling Changbin’s shirt back into place, smoothing it down before leaving one hand to rest protectively over the mark. Changbin did his best to send him reassuring emotions through the bond, hoping to cool the anger he could feel reverberating physically from Felix.

“Well, it’s not exactly common anymore, anyone could just come and claim that they were marked like that…” Minho tried defending himself, albeit meekly.

“That’s not something anyone would willingly claim, Minho! I explained to you what it means; this isn’t something that usually inspires compassion. Pity, maybe in some, but most commonly disgust and repulsion. No one goes around bragging about something like this!”

Minho looked positively sheepish, while Woojin was still seething. Chan didn’t say anything, yet his jaw was firmly set and his eyes, too, reflected some of the pain that burned in Woojin’s. Changbin averted his gaze to focus on Felix, who didn’t seem to be able to calm his anger, either. His hand found Felix’ thigh and he rubbed it comfortingly, prompting him to look up and meet his gaze. ‘It’s ok’ he tried to convey wordlessly, but Felix only held him tighter. His grip was close to bruising, and as soon as Felix realized, he forced himself to relax again. Changbin leaned into him more, and eventually the tension seeped out of Felix’ firmly set jaw, too.

“I hope you’ve at least learned something through this. You don’t go around invading someone’s privacy like that. I hope you’re done disappointing me like this, too. Clean this shit up, I’m going to bed.”

Before Woojin went, though, he stopped in front of Changbin, reaching out to cup his face to make him look up at him and caress his cheek with his thumb shortly.

“You are beautiful, Changbin, and perfect the way you are. Your mark doesn’t change anything about that. If anything, it shows how brave and strong you truly are. I am glad Felix found you.” There was clearly more that Woojin wasn’t voicing, but Changbin was positive he understood anyway, even if not consciously. A knot he hadn’t noticed had formed in his stomach loosened gradually at those words, filling Changbin with warmth even after Woojin retreated to his room.

“Alright, lets clean up, everyone. Not you, it’s ok, Changbin. You two can go ahead. Innie, you, too. Hyunjin, where did the bags go? Ah, thanks. Minho, you’re coming with me to return these to the cafeteria. Let’s take the trash, too…” Chan started splitting up the clean-up tasks, excusing Felix and Changbin from the duties.

Felix pulled Changbin up with him, never letting go of his hand once he’d found it. They walked silently to Changbin’s room, and the whole time Changbin could still feel Felix’ anger simmering. When Felix stopped in front of Changbin’s dorm door, Changbin refused to let go of his hand, pulling him inside and into his room with him. He closed the door gently, backing Felix against it before finally disentangling his fingers from Felix in favour of cupping the other’s face in both of his hands. Looking up, he found and held Felix’ gaze with his own, his own boring soothingly into the troubled depths of Felix’.

“Stop being mad, Felix. It’s ok. I’m ok.”

Felix exhaled shakily, looping his arms around Changbin and holding him tightly against his own body.

“It’s not ok. He should never have asked that…”

Changbin hummed.

“Maybe he shouldn’t, no. But he did. But everyone makes mistakes.”

Felix’ eyes fluttered shut, and he leaned into Changbin’s touch, eventually letting his head fall forward to lean against Changbin’s shoulder.

“Woojin is right, you know. You are so brave and strong… You are amazing, Changbin.”

Changbin didn’t feel amazing, but it was nice knowing Felix felt that way about him.

“Let’s go to sleep… Spend the night with me?” Changbin ventured, and Felix lifted his head again, pulling back enough to find Changbin’s gaze.

“Are you sure?”

Changbin nodded, humming affirmatively.

“You won’t get any sleep if you don’t, I can feel it. Besides, your room is a mess. I think I saw a chair on your bed and everything. Just stay with me?”

A small smile tugged on Felix’ lips, for the first time in what felt like ages, and Changbin relaxed.

“Ok.”

***

Changbin was resting comfortably in Felix’ arms, snuggled against the other under the blankets, but even though they both calmed down, sleep wouldn’t come easily to either of them.

“Felix? Can I ask you something?”

“Hmm…”

“About Woojin…”

“What about him?”

Changbin took a deep breath, contemplating how he should word it.

“The way he reacted, earlier. It was so… violent. I wouldn’t have expected that from him. Not-… not for me. It seemed so… I don’t know, personal? As if Minho had asked _him_ , not me…”

Felix remained quiet for a while, and Changbin half expected not to get an answer from him anymore, wondering if he’d fallen asleep without him noticing, even.

“If I tell you this, you can never breathe a word of it to anyone else, ok?” Felix eventually spoke up, though, and Changbin tensed a little. Immediately, Felix rubbed his back comfortingly.

“Woojin has never told any of the others about this, and it’s not our place to tell them. I’m willing to tell you, because… Because you are my soulmate, and you are probably the one who will be able to understand where he’s coming from the best; apart from Chan, of course.”

“Ok…”

Felix took a moment to sort his thoughts before he spoke again.

“Woojin… He used to have a little sister. She was a runt, too.”

Changbin inhaled sharply, holding his breath then, and Felix continued.

“When he was thirteen, she was only six years old. He didn’t understand how his pack could be so cruel to her all the time, and he eventually snapped and stood up for her when she was about to be punished for something she didn’t even do. It… It didn’t go well.”

Changbin could only imagine, his throat closing up as his eyes burned with unshed tears, both for Woojin and for the little girl he didn’t even know but could vividly sympathize with.

“Woojin was kicked out of the pack as a result, despite still being a child himself, and his sister… They killed her, for ‘bringing discord to the pack’.”

Changbin’s tears trickled silently down his face, his heart heavy. He almost wished he hadn’t asked; he should have known.

“So, yeah, that’s why he reacted like that earlier, and Chan, too. They’ve always made sure to teach the rest of us tolerance and acceptance, even if they never particularly specified… Other than with me, because I was a little shit -actually, a huge shit- when they found me.”

Changbin dried his tears quietly, and they stayed in silence for a while.

“Will Minho be ok?” Changbin eventually asked, and he could practically feel the incredulity from Felix over him asking that. He had to know, though.

“I’m sure he will. I’m sure he’s not done getting an earful from Chan, taking the containers back down to the kitchen isn’t going to be fun for him, but he’ll be fine. Chan is a good alpha. Better than half of us deserve…”

Changbin hummed, a little more appeased.

“You’re still mad at him, though… At Minho.”

Felix exhaled slowly, not answering immediately.

“Yeah, I am. He was being an insensitive ass. And a massive idiot. And he hurt both you and Woojin in the process.”

Changbin sighed, adjusting his position against Felix, shifting his head to lie on Felix’ shoulder while patting his chest softly.

“You should forgive him… You know, I can see where he’s coming from…”

“What?!”

“Yeah… I mean, he told us what he thought, right? Basically, he thought I was making shit up to get sympathy points. To someone who most likely has no idea what it means to be a runt, that could make total sense.”

Felix shook his head quietly.

“He should still have known better… He knows me, he should know I would never lie to him, or anyone in the pack. There was no need for him to make you go through that earlier.”

Changbin hummed, contemplative.

“It wasn’t that bad, you know… I hate that scar, yes, and I hate what it stands for, so much. I hate what it makes me. But… It’s a part of me. And, if _you_ are not disgusted by it, then I don’t really care if someone else is. Even if I am sorry I might have shocked Jeongin with the sight of the scar; he probably didn’t need to see something like that, ever.”

They lay in silence for a while, Felix silently incredulous over how someone as pure as Changbin could exist, after everything he already must have gone through in his life.

“You are truly something else, Seo Changbin…”

***

Changbin wondered if the other pack of the Academy knew where he’d spent last evening, and who he’d spent the night with, and if they were feeling more threatened than usual by it, as he avoided the fourth foul hallway attack from little groups of them. He was done playing around and letting them get hits in to keep them second-guessing his abilities, though. They knew now, anyway, and they were increasing their efforts. They were still nowhere near anything that compared to the attacks he’d learned to deflect while sparring with Felix, though, so he remained unharmed.

He could see from several paces away if someone was coming towards him with ill intent by now, and while he knew how to defend himself, he didn’t know how to react when at some point during that day following the dinner gathering with the pack, Minho strode towards him with purpose.

Changbin froze in his spot, eyes already having met Minho’s, so running away was not an option. He doubted he would be able to defend himself from him, too. He might have won against Felix a few times while sparring, but he had a feeling Felix always went soft on him. Minho would have at least the same skill-set as Felix, if not more, and he wasn’t prepared.

Despite his dark expression, Minho didn’t step within reach of Changbin as he appeared right in front of him. He didn’t attack. His expression, however, darkened further.

“I wanted to apologize again. For yesterday.” He muttered. Changbin wasn’t sure how much he really meant that, or if Chan had sent him.

“I understand now how that was not an ok thing to do.”

Changbin swallowed thickly but nodded.

“Apology accepted.” He muttered, and Minho relaxed a little before his shoulders squared up again.

“That doesn’t mean I like you. Or trust you, though.” Minho added, and Changbin nodded again.

“I know. I don’t expect you to.”

Minho shifted in his spot, clearly uncomfortable, but didn’t move away just yet.

“If you… if you take Felix away from us, I will never forgive you!” He almost spat, and Changbin flinched inwardly.

“That has never been nor will ever be my intention.”

Minho glared at him, clearly still unbelieving, until he seemed to see something behind Changbin that had him look a little startled and turn on the spot to hurry down the hallway, back in the direction he had come from. Changbin turned to see what was behind him, too, but he couldn’t find anything suspicious. That was, until Seungmin stepped out of the crowd, coming to a halt in front of him.

“Hey! Minho was just here?”

“Yeah… He apologized for yesterday. And warned me not to take Felix away from you.”

Seungmin rolled his eyes.

“He and Jisung act as if Felix has no mind of his own, as if you could pocket him and take him wherever with you if you chose to without him having a say in any of it…”

“I don’t plan on taking Felix anywhere. I don’t even have an anywhere to take him to.”

Seungmin sighed, exasperated, and shook his head.

“I know. They could know, too, if they paid attention for two seconds. But they’ll come around eventually, too, you know. They’re not bad guys. Just hard-headed idiots, sometimes. Anyway! I was going to ask you: do you have someone to do that calculus project with already?”

“Uh…” Changbin was a little taken aback by the sudden change of subject. He was starting to find that Seungmin seemed to be a pro at doing that. “No. I usually do those on my own…”

“It’s a pair-project, though. You are supposed to do it with a partner.”

Changbin gave him an a little exasperated look.

“I don’t normally find anyone willing to be my partner for any projects.”

“Hm, fair enough.” Seungmin conceded. “Would you want to do it with me, for a change? My usual partner for this kind of thing in calculus has suddenly developed an allergy to dog hair, apparently. Don’t know what that has to do with _me_.” The look in his eyes said he was well aware of the insult, but not willing to give it the time of day.

“Oh… Ok…” What was Changbin supposed to do? Say no?

“Great! Guess this will be a win-win situation for both of us, then, if we can actually split the work up for once instead of doing everything ourselves. Uh, I should get going, I have a chemistry lab next. But, how about we talk times to meet up and such over lunch? Or are you eating with Felix?”

Chan shook his head.

“No, Felix said he had to do something with Chan at lunch today…”

“Right, I forgot. You can eat with me and Jeongin, if you want.”

Again, what was Changbin supposed to say?

“Ok. I’ll… I’ll see you at lunch then. Good luck with your lab!”

Seungmin flashed him a genuine smile.

“Thanks! See you later!”

***

They did see each other later, at lunch. As soon as Changbin stepped into the cafeteria, he’d seen Jeongin get up and wave at him. It had been really him he’d meant, too, Changbin made sure to check behind and around him, but there was no one else the pup could have meant. So, he’d joined them after picking up food for himself.

It felt a little weird at first, but Seungmin and Jeongin didn’t let that feeling settle for long. It returned when a little later, Hyunjin and Jisung joined them, too, but even then, it died down quite quickly again. Hyunjin wasn’t as openly accepting of Changbin as Seungmin and Jeongin, but he was cordial and didn’t exclude Changbin from the conversations. Jisung kept quiet most of the time, and when he talked, it wasn’t obvious who he was addressing, and therefore also not who he wasn’t addressing. Before long, lunch was over, though. Seungmin and Changbin had found a time-slot that worked for both of them to work on their project, and they parted ways again.

Changbin tried not to let the comfortable, light feeling that populated his chest after the surprisingly nice lunch break take root, though. He feared the emptiness it would leave behind if he got used to it, accepted it, and it was wrenched out again. Good things didn’t tend to last for him, after all.

For a couple of weeks, they did, though.

Aside from meals shared with Felix, he found himself also sharing more meals with Seungmin and Jeongin, and even Chan and Woojin, when his meal time didn’t overlap with Felix’. Often, Hyunjin joined them, too, and he seemed to warm up to Changbin gradually.

Jisung and Minho remained as distanced as always, though. Even after Changbin found himself surrounded by the whole pack eventually for a few meals.

None of those meals had been planned to be taken with the whole pack, and it was always someone from the pack joining Changbin first, or inviting him to join them, followed by more members joining them until the whole pack was present. Those turned out to be fun times, even if not everyone acknowledged Changbin’s presence or talked to him. Those who did managed to make up for those who didn’t effortlessly, and Changbin gradually learned to feel comfortable around the pack, even if it was a tentative feeling.

When he was alone with one member of the pack or another, that comfortable feeling came more easily. Doing the calculus project with Seungmin was fun, even, and they finished it in no time. They got full marks, too, and agreed to work together on all projects from classes they shared from then on.

He ended up helping Jeongin with his homework a few times, too, the youngest of the pack claiming that none of his older pack-mates were simultaneously patient and intelligent enough to explain things to him in a way he understood. Jeongin turned out to be a bright kid who sometimes just needed things to be explained in a little different way than the teachers used to, and Changbin liked the feeling of accomplishment he got when Jeongin eventually understood something he explained, beaming happily at him, or his work sheets, as he finished his homework with renewed vigor.

Chan made an effort to spend some one on one time with Changbin, too, and Changbin finally got to hear those songs Chan had told him about before. He was instantly enamored with the style, as well as intrigued by the production process, and Chan offered to show him. Hours went by where the two disappeared, lost in the worlds of music, leaving both Felix and Woojin exasperated as they kept missing dinner dates, pack duties, and in Changbin’s case, sparring sessions, which he and Felix had taken up again to hone Changbin’s skills further since they suspected the other pack might be planning something.

All in all, Changbin felt content with the way things were going; truly content. He had time for himself, but he wasn’t lonely, either. Aside from Felix, whom he obviously spent most of his free time with, he was finding others that accepted him, truly accepted him and made him feel included. He would even dare call some of them friends.

Friends, who even invited him to their birthday dinner.

Changbin had never been to a birthday dinner before. He’d never been invited to one, and of course he was excluded from those of his siblings, back with his family. Jeongin wanted him to join his dinner, though, even if it was just made up of cafeteria food and happened nowhere fancy, either, but down in the cafeteria, too. (Jeongin told him he had debated having his dinner in the dorm common room again, but that wouldn’t be possible without having to deep-clean the place again, and he didn’t feel like spending his birthday cleaning; so, cafeteria it was.)

Changbin didn’t mind the choice of food or location, just happy he was invited in the first place. Elated, in fact, since it was the first time he’d get to officially have dinner with the whole pack again since that one night in the dorm, where everyone came together at the same time, not the last arriving at the time the first was about to leave again.

As he walked down the hallways, on his way to join the pack for dinner in the cafeteria, Changbin got distracted by those kinds of thoughts, paying less attention to his surroundings than he would usually have.

It was only when a door fell shut in front of him that he snapped into the present again, looking up from where he was going, and froze mid step.

The door to the stairwell in front of him was blocked. Not physically, but five of the members of the other pack stood in front of it. He was about to turn back around, when he heard the door behind him, half-way down the hallway, shut too, slow steps echoing on the tiled floor, closing in.

He felt his throat dry up, especially as he recognized the leader of the other pack among the five in front of him, eyeing him with a menacing grin on his face as he wrapped a chain around his knuckles. Only then did he notice the others hadn’t come empty-handed, either; pipes, sticks, something that looked like a mace, and a cliché but nevertheless terrifying baseball bat sat in the others’ hands.

This was not what he had trained to go up against, and he didn’t even want to know what those coming up behind him were carrying. Still, he glanced over his shoulder, finding probably the whole other pack, armed to their teeth, stepping out of the rooms lining the hallway.

“I told you, my pack or none. I guess you chose none…” The pack-alpha drawled lazily, playing with the chain in his hands as he gave Changbin a perverse grin.

Changbin couldn’t even swallow, blind fear constricting his throat.

He was going to die.


	13. Chapter 13 - Life Saver

He was going to die, and he knew it. He should have seen it coming. Should have seen it coming days ago, when he first noticed that it seemed as if the other pack had forgotten about him all of a sudden, when the subtle sneak attacks in the hallways stopped. How could he have been so stupid?!

He didn’t even realize he was taking small, stumbling steps back, trying to keep the whole pack in his line of view, blood rushing in his ears. He could tell the pack-alpha was saying something, but he couldn’t make out what he was saying for the life of him. He doubted it mattered, anyway. Nothing mattered anymore, nothing, he might as well stop retreating, too, there was nothing he could do-

In a sudden flash of clarity, he felt it, then: Felix.

Of course, Felix would feel his fear through the bond, just how he could feel Felix’ rising panic now.

Felix couldn’t come, though! Felix couldn’t intervene again, if Felix joined him here, they would both die! He couldn’t let Felix get hurt! He didn’t know how, but somehow, somehow he just slammed the doors to his conscience shut, shoved Felix out, locked his own conscience to him. Felix couldn’t find him and come running, like he probably -stupidly- would if he knew! He couldn’t be at fault for letting Felix get hurt, he couldn’t. Felix had to stay away!

Changbin gasped as his back hit a solid surface; the wall. He’d retreated as far as he could, there was nowhere he could go from here, this was the end. It had already been the end before, technically, but this was really, really it; definitely.

“Are you even listening to me? You’re not, are you. You’re too stupid to do even that. Or are you scared? Are you finally scared? Was this what it took to make you come to your senses? Why didn’t you say so? It could have saved us so much time! Too bad I’ve run out of patience now…” Some of the pack-alpha’s words filtered through to Changbin, and he noticed he had gotten much closer, along with the rest of the pack. And there were still more coming, weren’t there, over by the door-

Wait, no. On the other side of the glass doors at the end of the hallway, those weren’t members of this pack, those were-…

Minho and Jisung.

A twinge of hurt twisted in Changbin’s gut, but he stomped it down. He had no business feeling hurt. Minho and Jisung never liked him to begin with, it was his own fault for naïvely assuming they wouldn’t try to get rid of him given the chance.

A sudden whimper tore from his throat as pain flared in his skull from the pack-alpha grabbing his hair, pulling his head back so he was forced to look up at him. Tears stung his eyes from the burn, but he wasn’t willing to let them go.

“Do I have your attention now? Finally? I don’t like being ignored, you know!”

He let go of Changbin again, shoving him, and Changbin’s back and head hit the wall. He gasped, again, his heartbeat speeding up even more as he noticed the alpha unwinding the chain again, swinging it through the air as if to test its weight.

“There is no point in teaching you a lesson if you’re not paying attention… Regardless if you get to apply what you’ve learned or not!”

Changbin’s breath faltered as he saw it coming, he saw the moment the mood changed, the look in the alpha’s eyes went from playing to serious, and he cursed how he’d learned to see things like that.

The next seconds seemed to stretch forever: as if in slow motion, he cowered, ripping his arms up to cover his head despite knowing it was a futile attempt; the chain whistled as it cut through the air, the sound high and metallic, just the faintest clinking to it; a bang sounded in the distance, so loud it drowned out the sound of the chain for a moment, but Changbin had no idea where it was coming from.

Any moment now, he expected the pain of the chain coming down on him, probably going to break his arms, or at least his fingers if he was unlucky; splitting his skull and ending it all swiftly if he was lucky.

The impact never came, though.

Time snapped back to normal speed as a half-growl, half-yelp sounded at the same time as the chain clinked and thudded sickeningly, and a mere second later, a heavy mass of black fur collided with Changbin.

Shouts of protest sounded, along with an angry growl and a pained whimper as the mass of black fur moved and climbed off Changbin.

Changbin blinked his eyes open again, surprised to see a large black wolf standing between him and the other pack’s alpha. Black, with a greyish face and chest. He was quickly joined by another wolf, this one mostly light grey, with a mix of sandy and rusty coloured fur underneath.

“Oh, you’ve decided to join the fun! I’ve always wanted to get rid of you two anyway, thank you _so_ much for accommodating me!” The pack-alpha taunted, taking a step towards them and swinging the chain again.

Jisung, who Changbin assumed the lighter wolf was, didn’t wait for the alpha to finish swinging, though, leaping forward to attack instead. For a second, it looked like he would succeed in sinking his teeth into the hand the alpha was swinging the chain with, but in the very last moment, someone else barreled into him, knocking him out of the way. His teeth clacked loudly as he missed the alpha’s hand, and Changbin flinched as he realized he’d bitten into the chain instead. At least, he was successful in making the alpha let go of the chain with an angry yell, before he and the guy who’d tackled him hit the ground.

Jisung was back on his feet faster than the other, growling threateningly through a bleeding muzzle as he leapt back to Minho’s side. He fixed Changbin only shortly, and Changbin wasn’t sure he’d imagined it or heard correctly when he thought he might have barked “Shift!” at him. Either way, he was frozen in his spot, unable to do anything, including shifting, even if that didn’t require him moving.

For a moment, everything stood still, and then the four brutes who’d stood with the pack-alpha charged, as the latter stepped back. Jisung moved quickly, managing to avoid the hits aimed at him as if it was child’s play and doing a lot of damage of his own. Minho was slower, Changbin realized, even though he still managed to avoid getting hit again. It would only be a matter of time, though, he figured, before the hit he’d taken for Changbin would slow him too much.

That thought was what Changbin needed to finally unfreeze, and it was just in time as he ducked under a swing of the baseball bat. Minho had taken the hit of the chain for him; him and Jisung were standing with him, not against him.

“Shift, Changbin, damn it!”

There was no mistaking the yell this time, but Changbin didn’t heed it. He didn’t know how to fight in his wolf form, barely knew how to move at all. Shifting had always been a right reserved for the rest of his family, he’d never been allowed to. The few times he had shifted were in the middle of the night when everyone else was sleeping and he couldn’t be found out. But he’d never done much, then, quickly shifting back into his human form out of fear of being found out.

He had a better chance to evade the attacks and defend himself in human form; if any at all. There were plenty of near misses, and plenty of hits that at least gazed him. He didn’t manage to counter a single attack and do some damage of his own. At this point, it was only Jisung doing some damage among their attackers, as Minho was slowing considerably and barely managed to avoid getting struck again, too.

That was, until Minho fell for it as one of the others feinted to the left, then moved out of the way, and Minho stumbled. He hit the floor, and the mace-like weapon his attacker was carrying was coming at his head.

Changbin was sure he’d never moved so fast in his life, half deflecting and half blocking the pipe of his attacker to use it as leverage and vault himself through the air. His feet made contact with the mace, knocking it out of the way and unbalancing its wielder so he hit one of his own people, while Changbin virtually flew past him and landed in an unceremonious heap on the floor a few feet over. The mace hadn’t made contact with Minho, though, who managed to get back onto his feet. Wolf form or not, the expression on Minho’s face was unmistakable, shock mixed with bewildered gratitude.

If it was Changbin’s interference in the flow of the fight or the door at the end of the hallway banging open again that caused everyone to freeze for a moment was unclear, but suddenly, time seemed to stand still again. At least for Changbin, with him being the only one moving.

To his left, was the fight scene: Minho and Jisung surrounded by four of the other pack-alpha’s lackeys. The four looked a little worse for wear, bleeding through scratches and bite-wounds while the one who’d been hit with the mace cradled a probably broken arm to his chest, but all of them were still standing and ready to keep going. Minho and Jisung didn’t show any outward signs of their state in their wolf forms, but Changbin knew they were hurt, too, and neither would be able to stand up to their attackers much longer.

To his right, was the rest of the other pack, and behind them, in the now open door, the person he simultaneously longed to see the most, and the least; Felix.

“No…!” He breathed, desperate. He’d been too late, he’d blocked the bond too late, Felix had managed to find them and now he, too, would be beaten up, if not worse.

Time unfroze again as Felix burst through the door, shifting mid step and bolting down the hallway in a few powerful leaps to come to a skidding halt right next to Changbin.

“You shouldn’t have come!” Changbin whispered, desperate, tears now finally springing free.

Felix answered with an angry growl, and Changbin winced. He got up, though, and as he scrambled, he almost missed the rest of the pack arriving.  They were exclusively in their wolf forms except for Hyunjin, who was holding the door to let the others through before shifting, too, and joining them as they surrounded Changbin, Minho and Jisung. The latter two had taken the momentary distraction to join Changbin and Felix and slip out from between their attackers. Now, they pressed close next to Changbin as the rest of the pack took them into their middle.

“I thought I’d been clear about my displeasure with you attacking my pack…” Chan growled low, and Changbin felt every hair on his body rise and stand on end as the alpha’s commanding voice washed over him.

“Well, you might have been, but the thing is: _I just don’t care_ , you know. You’re in my territory, so it’s only natural I end up taking out a few of your pack members here and there.”

It was absolutely unfathomable to Changbin how the other pack alpha managed to stay so unaffected by Chan’s commanding voice, shrugging nonchalantly as he strolled over into view, his hands in his pockets. Chan, on the other hand, didn’t remain unaffected by the other alpha’s words.

“This is neutral territory, not _your_ territory! You have no right…!”

The other waved dismissively.

“That is what _they_ think. I don’t care what they say! It doesn’t concern them, anyway! I claimed this territory, and until someone actually disputes it, it will remain mine. Deal with it!”

At that, Chan took a slow step forward, growling threateningly.

“Is that so… Well. I guess I am disputing it, then!”

“Chan!” Changbin heard someone hissing quietly, probably Woojin. Chan ignored it, though.

The other alpha laughed.

“Oh, really? That’s cute! And how do you think you’re going to do that, with your puny little pack of weaklings? Have you failed to notice the size of my pack in comparison? That’s ok, you know, if you can’t see well I’m sure someone can lend you a pair of glasses; or should I have everyone introduce themselves to you, so you can get an idea?”

With him, several others from his pack laughed, but Changbin would have sworn that a good few of those laughs sounded somewhat nervous. Chan ignored that, too, though.

“No, I have, in fact, noticed the size of your pack, behind which you like to hide all the time, like the little coward that you are. I am not challenging your pack, though. I am challenging _you_. Personally, and as pack alpha.”

For a second, the other alpha’s expression slipped before he caught himself and laughed again. There was an edge of hysteria to it this time around, though.

“Oh, really now! Listen, I don’t care about your pack, and I don’t want anything with it, you can keep it. All I have my eyes set on is that measly little rat hiding in your midst even though he’s not one of yours. He’s mine. And I want him back. Hand him over, and no one needs to get hurt!”

Changbin’s heart stopped beating. For a sheer endless moment, it stopped, cramping painfully in his chest instead of pumping blood through his body like it should. Their position wasn’t the best, and he was sure Chan more than anyone could feel the distress Woojin was radiating so obviously that even he, as an outsider to the pack, could feel it; the sensible thing to do would be handing him over, and that would be his end.

“Today you want him, and you claim that’s it. And next week you’ll ask to hand someone else over, or I can pick their remains up from the morgue -or a maintenance closet, since that seems to be more your specialty… Forget it. We’re settling this once and for all today, right here, right now!”

Changbin’s heart resumed beating, and he almost wished it hadn’t. Every beat hurt, and it was beating frantically, galloping in his chest at a pace he expected it to break his ribs at any point now.

“As you wish. I guarantee you, though, there will be nothing left of your pack to pick up from anywhere once mine is done with it…”

“Nuh-uh. Not my pack against yours. You and me, remember? Just us. No more hiding behind your pack. Or… are you perhaps admitting you are too weak to fight me? Are you forfeiting?”

To Changbin, it became obvious what Chan was trying to do. By questioning the other alpha’s strength and leadership qualities, he forced him into a one-on-one fight, which Chan clearly had better chances to win than if they had to fight the entire other pack. There was no way for the other to back out of his challenge like that without indirectly admitting he was unfit as leader.

More and more of the other pack’s members must have been coming to the same conclusion, as murmur went through their ranks, whispers starting up amongst the members as they shifted in their places, clearly nervous and anticipating their leader’s response.

“Never!” The alpha growled, and the murmur ceased immediately. “I would never forfeit to a stray like you! Fine then; since you called for this, I am choosing the weapons!”

Chan tsked.

“No weapons. What is a pack alpha who can’t protect their pack and claim their rank without additional help worth?! We fight like wolves, not like humans. That’s your philosophy, too, isn’t it? That we are superior to humans? You should prove you mean it.”

The other narrowed his eyes at Chan, rolling his shoulders and cracking his knuckles in a show of power and strength, but Chan didn’t flinch.

“Fine then… If you lose, I’ll crush every single one of your pack members. Starting with your pathetic excuse for a mate; or should I save him for last, make him suffer through seeing all of the others get torn to shreds? Then again, he probably won’t care after you’re gone; pathetic, as I said. I’ll save your youngest for last, then. The younger they are, the more they take things like that to heart… Yes; yes, that’s a good plan.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. You can start making plans once you’re done with me. But if _I_ win, you’re going to piss off forever and never even breathe the same air as any one of my pack members again; understood?”

The alpha laughed menacingly, but the edge of hysteria remained in his voice.

“I am going to enjoy tearing your pathetic little pack to shreds!”

Chan rolled his eyes, and then he lurched forward, feinting to one side and changing directions too quickly for anyone to even realize he’d moved at all, his teeth sinking into the fleshy part of the other alpha’s ankle. The alpha cried out, then turned to kick at Chan, but Chan had already moved out of the way, circling the other.

“Gah, you could bathe more often, you know… Not all of the human’s inventions are bad, I heard especially soap is quite useful. You taste _awful_!” Chan spat, shaking his head to get rid of the bad taste in his mouth.

“You filthy mutt! You’ll regret this!”

The alpha charged forward, but he wasn’t as unskilled as Chan had expected him to be, and he only just barely managed to avoid the other. Changbin startled a little as Jeongin almost tripped over him, being shoved into the center of the circle that had formed around him as well.

“You’re not watching this!” Woojin muttered, worry bleeding heavily through his words as he shoved Jeongin behind himself; it sounded like he, too, would rather not watch this, but there was no way in hell he would take his eyes off his mate. Jeongin didn’t protest, shifting back to his human form and hiding his face in Minho’s shoulder. He clearly didn’t want to see what was happening, either, anyway.

Changbin, contrary to Jeongin, found it almost impossible to tear his gaze away from the fight. The two alphas kept circling each other, feinting left and right, but neither managed to place another hit or bite. The other pack’s alpha kept shifting, too, sometimes attacking in human form, sometimes in wolf form. His injured leg put him at a disadvantage, but his constant shifting seemed to confuse Chan enough to not be able to place another successful attack.

Eventually, the other alpha’s injured leg seemed to tire him, though. His shifting became less smooth, and so did his movements. It wasn’t just Chan who noticed that, either; the alpha himself was very aware of it, and after only just managing to dodge another of Chan’s attacks, he clearly decided his time was now or never.

Changbin noticed the glint in his eyes change, and the subtle move of his hand as he reached behind his back. He wasn’t sure what the alpha was planning, but he felt like something was off.

The next few attacks Chan launched were only just barely dodged, Chan getting closer each time, with the other alpha no longer shifting back and forth between wolf and human. It looked like Chan was gaining the upper hand, and Chan clearly believed that, too. His next attack was almost successful, and everyone in the hallway seemed to hold their breath.

And then, Changbin saw it, just for the fraction of a second as the other alpha stood with his back to them: a metallic glint in the alpha’s hand, a narrow but long, polished blade, slipping from inside the alpha’s sleeve into his hand as Chan charged yet again.

“Chan! Watch out!” Woojin had clearly seen the blade, too, but Chan was too focused on the fight to heed his warning.

“No!” Changbin growled, startling himself as well as Jeongin and Jisung next to him. He couldn’t let this happen! Without thinking, he once again charged forward, the only goal in his mind reaching the other alpha before Chan ran into the blade.

He didn’t feel it, the shift in his form as he took off, but muscles made for sprinting and jumping propelled him faster and further than his human form ever had, uncoordinated as they were, and he crashed into the alpha’s side just as he swung around to ram the blade into Chan’s body.

The alpha unbalanced, stumbling almost comically before he tripped over his own feet and his momentum sent him sprawling. His head hit the floor with a sickening thud, but Changbin barely heard it as he was buried under Chan’s weight. With the alpha out of the way, he had been the one left in Chan’s line of attack, with no time left for Chan to change direction.

“Changbin?! What the fuck?!” Chan growled, disentangling himself from him and jumping back, after only just barely being able to stop himself from sinking his teeth into and crushing Changbin’s shoulder, too.

An uproar went through the gathered members of the other pack, and shouts came from Chan’s pack, too, noise filling the previously mostly empty hallway.

“What was that for?! I could have had him this time! You can’t just interfere in a fight between pack alphas!” Chan growled, clearly fuming, and Changbin cowered under the weight of the anger and authority in his voice.

“He had a knife, Chan!” Woojin’s voice cut through the cacophony then, as he ran to their side, in his human form. “He had some kind of blade, and he was about to _stab you_! He would have succeeded, if it weren’t for Changbin!”

Woojin was fuming, stomping over to the alpha on the floor and kicking his shoulder, making him roll onto his back. As he did, two things became apparent to everyone: one, the alpha was not conscious; two, Woojin’s claim was true, the blade laying still in the alpha’s hand.

Chan paled as he saw the evidence, and seemingly realized just how close he had come to being run through by the sharp object.

Meanwhile, the rest of their pack joined them, huddling close, and Felix helped a very sick looking Changbin onto his feet, after he’d shifted back into his human form.

Just then, a portion of the other pack started to close in on them.

“You played foul! Therefore, the victory is ours! One of yours interfered in the fight!” One of the lackeys who seemed to be closest to the other pack alpha roared, moving to grab the closest member of their pack. It happened to be Woojin, who ducked quickly and shoved the guy back so hard he stumbled into his closest companion.

“Oh really?! And your piece of shit coward of an alpha bringing a fucking blade into a pack alpha fight is not playing foul?!”

No one moved, at least not towards them. Some of the members from the other pack, however, shifted uncomfortably in their spots, and a few started surreptitiously moving towards the doors, slinking away. Not one of the other pack’s members contested Woojin’s claim, the evidence was there, right in front of them, and undisputable.

“Your alpha lost the fight the moment he drew the blade! He proved to all of us he is no more than a cowardly bully, with no dignity and honor. He isn’t worthy of the title of pack alpha; but that is your business, not ours. Our business is merely that you leave us alone from now on; every stinking last one of you! Or so help me, you will learn firsthand what it means to fight dirty and be defeated dirtily!” Woojin growled, and the wolves in front of him took a step back.

Satisfied with that action, that admission of defeat, Woojin turned on his heels and stomped over to Chan, who still stood a little dazed in the same spot as before, even if he’d shifted back to human form, too.

“And you!” Woojin growled, and Chan snapped out of his daze, jumping in his skin. “When I tell you to _watch out,_ you bloody fucking _watch out_ next time, damn it!” Woojin seemingly dwarfed Chan as he postured himself in front of his mate, hitting his chest angrily before pulling him in for a tight hug and burying his face in his shoulder.

More of the other pack’s members that had been standing further back started slinking away, leaving the hallway altogether, and even the alpha’s cronies, the ones who always crowded around him wherever he went, started moving away. At first, it seemed like none of them was even going to help their alpha, but eventually two of them moved to grab his unconscious form under the armpits and dragged him with them, even if none too gently. That was when Changbin understood it was over, and he sagged in Felix’ hold. Felix startled at first but caught him before he could come anywhere close to falling.

“Changbin?! Changbin!”

“I’m ok. I’m ok… But he’s… He’s not…!” Changbin barely managed to whisper, clutching to Felix weakly.

Felix didn’t understand what Changbin meant, the first part of what he said much more important to him than the rambling in the end, anyway. Changbin felt that Felix wasn’t listening to him, though, that he didn’t understand, even with the bond still blocked, and frustration took over his thinking by storm. He shoved Felix away and himself out of his hold, stumbling a few steps before he caught his footing properly and turned to run away.

He ran, and kept running, as far as his legs would carry him.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t very far. He managed it down the hallway, into the next, and up a flight of stairs before his legs gave out under him and he collapsed in the middle of the hallway. Finally, it became all too much, the stress from the fight, from seeing Felix in harm’s way, from watching Chan fight and risk his life, from blocking the bond for so long, and ultimately… from being the reason that other pack alpha had lain there so damn _immobile_.

“Shh, Bin, Binnie, it’s ok. It’s ok, I’m here. I got you.”

“I-it’s not!” Changbin protested, mad that Felix had followed him, and mad that he didn’t understand; at least, with part of his being. His unconscious side gladly accepted the embrace Felix was wrapping him up in, clutching to him almost desperately.

“Ok, but I’m still here, and I still got you. And I’m going to take you to my room now, ok? We’re almost there, anyway. And then you can tell me what’s wrong, ok?” Felix’ voice was soothing, and he could have been reading him the groceries shopping list in that voice, it would still have calmed Changbin. At least enough for him not to struggle and reject it as Felix picked him up and carried him to the dorm and to his room.

“Are you hurt, Bin? I- I can’t feel you. I need you to tell me, so I can make it ok again.” Felix pried gently after setting him down on the bed, but Changbin shook his head.

“I’m not _hurt_. A few bruises, maybe… Possibly. But that’s not… Not what’s _wrong_!”

Felix blinked, confused, but sat down on the bed next to Changbin and took his trembling hands into his own.

“Ok… Ok. Please tell me what’s wrong?”

Changbin took a shuddering breath before starting.

“That alpha…”

Felix’ gaze darkened.

“I know…! Filthy bastard, he could have-… Chan, he-…” Felix couldn’t even finish his sentence, but Changbin shook his head vehemently.

“No! I mean, yes, but-… Felix, _I_ did that, I-… he wasn’t _moving_ , he-… I think he hit his head, do you think he- he’s d- _dead_?” He choked out the last word, his gaze finding Felix’ in a pleading cry for reassurance.

“What… Changbin, I… I don’t understand…”

“I think I-… I might have k-killed him, I-…” He felt sick, so sick all of a sudden, he was sure he was going to vomit. He pushed Felix’ hands out of the way, scrambling onto his feet to dart out of the room and to the bathroom. However, he barely made it out of the door to Felix’ room when he barreled into Chan, who caught him before they could both fall.

“Whoa, whoa, Changbin, what- where are you going?”

“B-bathroom… Sick…!” Changbin pressed out, and then Chan was helping him to his destination, where he unloaded the scarce contents of his stomach.

“He thinks he might have-… the other alpha…” Changbin heard Felix whisper, explaining to Chan as he arrived in the bathroom, too. He could imagine the gesture accompanying his words even if Felix avoided saying that one specific one, but he was still grateful he didn’t say it out loud as he heaved over the bowl.

“He didn’t, though. He was just unconscious. He was breathing when I flipped him over.” Woojin answered him.

Changbin had no idea if he had already been in here when he’d barged in, or if he’d come in after them. He found he didn’t really care, either, focusing instead on the hand running through his hair, brushing it out of his face. It wasn’t Felix’ hand, but it felt cool and nice against his skin and gentle on his head.

“Did you hear that, Bin? You’re ok. He’s alive.” Chan repeated, closer to him, his voice soothing in a way that went bone deep, in a way that was completely different from Felix’. Briefly, he wondered if that was part of the power a pack-alpha’s voice held, too. “By the way, thank you for what you did there. You probably saved my life, you know…”

“Damn right, he did! You should never have engaged that scum in a fight, you could have known he would play dirty!” Woojin muttered from somewhere behind them.

“I knew he would. That’s why I was so careful when I engaged him from the beginning.” Changbin could hear the eyeroll in Chan’s voice, but Woojin would have none of it.

“Yeah, and you got cocky really fast and almost got yourself stabbed like a rookie! You’re so lucky I need you with me to make sure you’re really not dead yet tonight, or you’d be sleeping on the couch! Oh! Sorry, Min, I didn’t mean to, sorry, sorry!” He ended, soothing quickly as someone else hissed sharply somewhere behind Changbin.

Changbin was quickly getting fed up with only hearing what was going on, with hanging over the toilet bowl, and with half laying on the floor. He was done getting rid of the last remains of lunch, anyway, and only wanted to put some distance between himself and the grossness they’d become as soon as possible.

Thankfully, the person -people?- holding him seemed to get the message in his weak struggles to push himself away from the bowl, helping him sit up and turn around. He found himself fully in Felix’ arms then, Chan closing and flushing the toilet behind him before moving to get a damp towel to help clean him up and a cup of water.

The bathroom was crowded with five people inside; the fifth, beside Woojin, Chan, Felix and Changbin himself, being Minho. Woojin had him sit on the edge of the bathtub, tending to a nasty bruise that wrapped almost completely around his ribcage. Changbin winced when he noticed what must have caused it, some of the shapes distinctly looking like the links of a chain. He’d almost forgotten about that, how Minho had taken that first blow with the chain, saving Changbin from it.

Changbin must have been staring, and Minho caught his look. A small grin formed on his face when Changbin’s gaze met his.

“I will consider us even, you and me.” He stated, attracting everyone’s attention to himself.

“Huh?” Woojin was the only one who asked, looking up from where he was cleaning a cut where the chain had broken Minho’s skin.

“Changbin probably saved my life, too; there was a mace coming right at my head shortly before you guys arrived that Changbin kicked out of the way just in time. That was after I took this-” he pointed at his ribcage “-for him, though. By the way, you’ll have to show me how you did that vaulting thing sometime.” He winced as Woojin likely applied a little too much pressure somewhere. “ _After_ this shit’s healed, though…”

“And not a day sooner! I swear on everything holy, if I have to patch any of you up again any time soon after this, _I_ am going to be the one beating you up!”

Chan chuckled softly at his mate’s heated words, crouching down next to Felix and Changbin again as he handed Changbin the towel he had dampened so he could clean up.

“That is such an empty threat, Woojinnie, and we all know it…”

Woojin growled in response, but truly there was no real bite behind it.

“If I were you, I wouldn’t push my luck, Bang Chan-ssi. You are still on the metaphorical couch for the night!”

Chan rose his hands in surrender, lowering his head, too, for good measure, before focusing on Changbin beside him again. Changbin was done wiping at his face, and Felix had taken the towel from him; Chan handed him the cup of water, then. Changbin took it, but he couldn’t manage more than a few sips.

Eventually, Woojin was done looking after Minho’s bruise, and he turned to Changbin, too.

“What about you, Bin? Are you hurt somewhere?”

Changbin shook his head, but Felix huffed quietly.

“He said before that he has a few bruises, too.”

Woojin hummed in understanding.

“Will you look after them in a bit? Changbin? Will you let him?”

Changbin didn’t answer.

“You should, you know… I don’t want your pain to drag out longer than the absolute necessary. Please consider letting Felix patch you up later…”

Changbin still said nothing but leaned heavier into Felix hold. He felt tired now, incredibly tired. He didn’t remember if he got out of the bathroom at any point, letting the blissful dark reprieve of unconsciousness encompass him. Today had just been too much.

 


	14. Chapter 14 - Belated Birthday

Changbin came to slowly, still feeling unbelievable heavy and tired. He could hear hushed voices in the room with him, but it took a while before he could make out the words.

“…just can’t fall asleep, every time I start drifting off, it’s like I suddenly become aware of the void where he usually just _is_ , and I startle awake and have to check that he’s really still here, that he’s breathing, that he’s alive. It’s like there is a hole in my mind, in my existence, now. And it’s freaking me out. How did you cope at all when Woojin did that to you and he wasn’t even there with you?!”

“I don’t even know…”

“I think I would go crazy; I feel like I’m going crazy, now!”

“You might argue that I _have_ gone crazy back then. Woojin would argue that, too, probably. If he talked about that time, at all, that is. It’s a very dark period of both our lives for a reason…”

Changbin identified the other person that was in the room with him beside Felix as Chan. He had a vague idea what they were talking about, but he was too tired to keep listening and piece the meaning of their words together properly. He fell back asleep before Chan even finished speaking this time.

The next time he came to, he instantly felt more awake. He didn’t feel heavy anymore, and the tiredness didn’t weigh him down. It took him only a few seconds to figure out what had woken him up, too.

It was Felix, even if not on purpose. He’d startled awake, sitting up rapidly and reaching out for Changbin. Changbin could feel Felix’ hands on him, searching, frantic, until they settled and Felix let out a relieved breath, followed by a quiet sob.

“You’re here… you’re ok…” Felix whispered quietly, talking to Changbin, whom he assumed asleep, but to reassure himself most of all.

The bits of conversation Changbin had heard earlier filtered back into his mind, and now they made perfect sense. They had been talking about the bond, the bond that Changbin was still blocking. Changbin bit his lip guiltily in the darkness, resolving to fix that immediately. He focused hard, searching in his mind for where Felix’s consciousness should be lingering, somewhere at the edge, and reached out. He expected there to be some kind of barrier, but no, it just felt like he had to reach far, further than ever before, to reach Felix.

Next to him, Felix gasped, and simultaneously Changbin could feel Felix’ consciousness again. He didn’t need to hear Felix’ sobs to know the other was crying now, but being able to hear him, too, succeeded in breaking his heart. He reached out in the dark to where Felix was sitting next to him, his hand finding his back and stroking it softly.

Felix turned slightly, and Changbin reached up to pull him down, into his arms. Felix followed willingly, almost throwing himself onto Changbin and holding him as close as possible in that position in turn. He buried his face against Changbin’s chest and let the sobs wrack his body.

Changbin held him tightly, running his hands along his back and through his hair comfortingly.

“Please, please, never do that to me again…” Felix begged, but Changbin didn’t answer. Felix tried his best to calm down, controlling his sobs with deep breaths before he looked up to speak.

“Please, don’t ever block the bond again. I… Earlier, when you did-… I felt your fear, it was so sharp, and then suddenly-… You were _gone_! I thought- I thought I’d lost you, that you were-… That they’d-…” He shook his head, burying his face in Changbin’s chest again, and Changbin resumed running his hands through his hair, too.

“It was unbearable, Changbin... For those moments, between when you suddenly blocked our bond, until when Jisung and Minho crashed through the pack bond with the scenes in the hallway, of you surrounded, and that filthy pig swinging that chain at you-… I thought you’d _died_ , then saw you didn’t, just to realize you just might after all in a few seconds… And Minho and Jisung couldn’t focus on you while you fought for me to be able to see if you were ok, and I could feel _nothing_ from you…!”

Changbin felt a thick lump in his throat. He’d never thought, not for a second, about what him blocking the bond would feel like to Felix.

“I’m sorry…” He whispered quietly, leaning up just so to press a kiss onto the top of Felix’ head. “I really am. I didn’t know… I wanted to protect you. I was sure I was going to die there, and I couldn’t bear the thought of you coming to help me and sharing my fate. The thought of you getting hurt was unbearable to me. I thought… I was sure it was too late for me, but I wanted to save you. And, if it hadn’t been for Minho and Jisung…”

“If it hadn’t been for them, I would have lost my mind, thinking I’d lost you. And I, we, wouldn’t have found you in time…”

Changbin sighed quietly.

“I’m sorry…” He apologized again, and Felix burrowed closer.

“Just… please don’t ever block the bond again. Not like that. Block your emotions or your thoughts from me, maybe even keep me out and from being able to reach you through the bond, but please, don’t ever shut off completely again to the point I can’t feel you at all. That… That hurts so much…”

Changbin kept holding Felix close, and let him hold him in turn, but he found he couldn’t make that promise.

“I’ll never be able to bear the thought that I’m making you run into danger, Felix. If I’m ever in a situation like this again, where I’m sure it’s my end and you would only get hurt for no good reason, I would do the same thing again. Now that I know how much it affects you, I would never block the bond just like that, I promise, but to save your life, I would do it again in a heartbeat.”

Felix was not appeased.

“You should reach out to me if you’re in danger, though… Chances are that if I’m not with you, I’m with the pack, and they’d come with me to help you. We stand more of a chance together than you would give us credit for…”

Changbin hummed.

“If I think you have a chance of defeating whatever trouble I run into, I’ll reach out to you. I can promise at least that.”

“Is that the best I’ll get from you?”

Changbin hummed again, affirmatively, and Felix sighed.

“You’re going to be my end, eventually… I don’t think I’ll live long if I have to go through episodes like today often…”

Changbin snorted softly.

“I don’t exactly plan on having my life threatened often, you know…”

“You better not… Today was probably the worst experience of my life! I still feel like you’re going to slip through my fingers and disappear forever at any moment!”

Changbin grimaced in the dark, holding Felix closer while still playing with his hair.

“I’m sorry. I’m right here, though, and I’m not going anywhere any time soon…”

Felix mumbled something incomprehensible against Changbin’s chest, and they fell silent. Changbin was still tired, and he felt like drifting off to sleep again, but he could tell that Felix was still wide awake about an hour later.

“You should sleep, ‘Lix…” He mumbled softly, and Felix shifted in his arms.

“I know… But I can’t…” He sounded quite miserable, voice heavy with tiredness.

Changbin sighed, then pushed Felix off him gently. Before Felix’ confusion could grow too much, Changbin followed the movement and draped himself half over him in turn. He came to lie higher up than Felix had, and he took the chance to kiss Felix’ forehead before moving to snuggle into him.

“Maybe if you lie down more comfortably, you’ll actually fall asleep… Don’t worry, I’m not leaving. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. You can still hold on to me, too, if that helps.”

Felix made a little embarrassed sound, but his hand still found Changbin’s face to pull him down for an actual kiss. It was a slow, tired kiss, but Felix’ urgency was still noticeable through it. Changbin humored him, kissing Felix long and firmly, reassuringly, until the note of desperation left the way he kissed.

“Sleep. We can do this all day tomorrow if you want, but for now, try to get some sleep. I’ll be here.”

Felix whined a little as Changbin broke the kiss but shut up when Changbin thumped his forehead lightly.

“I’m tired, too… I’m not going anywhere…” He muttered, reassuring Felix yet again as he found a comfortable way to lie half on top of Felix. With every time he repeated his reassurance, he could feel some of the restlessness in Felix’ consciousness easing away, and the other’s tiredness winning over slowly. So, even if he had to repeat himself a hundred times and risk sounding like a broken record, if that was what it took to get Felix to sleep, he would do it.

“I’m here, ‘Lix…” He mumbled again, but as soon as he’d found a comfortable position in Felix’ arms, his own tiredness was winning over again.

‘I’m here. I’m with you.’ He wasn’t sure he was even saying the words out loud anymore, his mind going fuzzy with sleep. Still, he knew Felix had heard them as he felt him relaxing more, too. Maybe he was just sending the words through their bond at this point, but maybe that was exactly what Felix needed.

Either way, Felix was eventually asleep before Changbin was, and Changbin finally allowed himself to follow him.

***

Changbin woke up the next morning because of the noise in the common area of the dorm. He didn’t move from his spot, still secure in Felix’ arms, though. He had a feeling having Felix wake up with him gone wouldn’t be a good idea. He also didn’t want to wake Felix up yet while moving around; not after the other had slept so little last night.

That decision was taken out of his hands a while later, when someone knocked on the door. Changbin didn’t answer, since it wasn’t his room, but the knocking repeated, more firmly, firmly followed by Chan calling both their names, and then Changbin answered. Chan opened the door, stepping inside.

“Hey… You both awake?”

Changbin shook his head no.

“Please wake Felix up soon. I need everyone to wake up and get ready. We need to head to our respective classes, even if we don’t feel like it. There is a not unlikely chance that we might get expelled for what happened yesterday; maybe only some of us, maybe all of us. Either way, we need to be in our respective classes to find out if someone is looking for us to inform us, and up and running to gather our stuff if it happens.”

Changbin’s heart sank, and it must have shown on his face since Chan gave him an apologetic smile before moving to leave again. He hadn’t quite left the room when Jeongin slipped in in his stead, rolling his eyes as he left.

“He’s making it sound like it’s the worst thing that could happen to us… Honestly, no one is really bothered because of that possibility but him…” He sighed, sitting down on the edge of the bed to shove at Felix over Changbin.

“I’m awake, stop poking me…” Felix grumbled, face pressed against Changbin’s shoulder, but he pulled back and looked up eventually.

“That is a bad thing, though… Chan is right to be worried. It won’t be easy for us if we get expelled…” He mumbled, a frown already on his face.

“We’re not expelled yet, though. Which means we still get breakfast. Seungmin and Hyunjin should be back any moment now, I suggest you get up if you want to eat something, too.” Jeongin waved Felix’ concerns off, poking him again, and Felix groaned.

“I’m up, I’m up… What are you even doing in here, you pest?”

“Minho and Jisung were being gross and the tension between Woojin and Chan is still palpable, so I ran away.”

“Into my room, when you have one to yourself?”

“I didn’t feel like being alone, but I felt like annoying you.” Jeongin shrugged, causing Felix to narrow his eyes at the youngest.

“And what if Changbin and I decide to be as gross as Minho and Jisung?”

Changbin rolled his eyes at that, shoving Felix away and getting up.

“I don’t think so... Breakfast is calling; I think I heard the front door.”

Jeongin grinned, jumping up and grabbing Changbin’s arm to hug it before pulling him along to the door, while Felix made a noise of betrayal.

“Keep this up and you’re going to become my favourite hyung one day!”

Changbin chuckled, recognizing Jeongin’s joking around for what it was, but followed the youngest willingly. It was for the best, if he stayed in bed with Felix, it would take the two ages to get up and ready between all the cuddling.

***

“I feel like all of you should be eating porridge, too, you know. As an act of sympathy of sorts.” Jisung whined, eyeing Minho’s peanut butter and jelly sandwich sadly.

Minho rolled his eyes before turning to Jisung with a nasty grin.

“I can chew it for you, if you want, babe.”

A round of ‘Ewww’ and ‘Fucking gross, dude!’ answered Minho, and he cackled obnoxiously until Jisung shoved him in the ribs, which made him wince.

“Asshole. Next time you’re about to get whipped with a chain, I’m letting it happen… Never sacrificing my teeth for you again!” he muttered, dejectedly going back to his porridge.

“I can make you a sandwich with untoasted bread? It shouldn’t be too hard to chew, right?” Hyunjin offered, but Chan intervened.

“No, leave it. Jisung’s not chewing anything before I’ve taken him to a dentist. Sorry, Ji. We’re not taking risks.”

Jisung looked miserable but nodded in defeat.

“Thanks anyway, Jinnie.”

“You can always mix some jelly into your porridge, though. Or just eat it straight. Just this once, an exception because you can’t chew.” Seungmin suggested, and Jisung perked up a little. He still looked cautiously at Chan to see if that was ok, and the alpha nodded subtly. Instantly, Jisung reached for the jar with the jam and a spoon, both ladling some into his porridge and eating a whole spoonful straight.

“Man, now _I’m_ jealous! Quick, someone find me a chain to bite so I can have some, too!” Minho whined, just to snap out of it as a ball of paper hit his head.

“Idiot…” Woojin mumbled under his breath, more fond than exasperated and shaking his head before going back to his breakfast.

Changbin watched the scene over his own bowl of cereal, wedged between Jeongin and Felix on one of the couches for breakfast. It was the first time he was eating together with the pack in their dorm again since that first shared dinner.

“Do you want some of the bacon, too, Bin? It’s almost gone; if you want it you need to hurry.” Felix caught his attention, and Changbin shook his head.

“It’s ok, you can have it. Save me an egg, though?”

Felix nodded, doing as asked as he went to refill his own plate with bacon.

“So, Changbin…”

Minho called out suddenly, causing the whole room to go silent, and stirring a sense of Deja vu in Changbin that tightened his stomach in a knot.

“I’m wondering; are you still willing to give the whole pack business a try, or are you done with packs for good now, after yesterday?”

“Minho…! Not the time!” Changbin could hear Woojin hissing, while he shrunk further into his seat next to Jeongin. Why did Felix have to be up right now, and not next to him so he could shrink behind him, using him as barrier between him and Minho?

Minho, Changbin was quickly learning, was quite skilled in ignoring when someone warned him to stop, though.

“Because, we were actually wondering if you wouldn’t like to join ours. At least that’s what we decided we would like to happen. Only if you want to, of course.”

Changbin was vaguely aware his jaw had dropped, but he couldn’t recall how to snap it closed again at the moment.

“W-wha…” He stammered intelligently.

“We meant to ask you last night over dinner, actually. Kind of like a present for Innie, because that’s the only thing he wished for. But, yeah, that fell flat. So…”

“You… what? Are you for real?!” Jeongin screeched from next to Changbin, startling the later into finally snapping his mouth shut again.

“It’s true, we meant to ask last night…” Chan confirmed, and Jeongin screeched again. Suddenly, Changbin found himself with an armful of pup, patting the younger on the back awkwardly after the initial shock. When the youngest pulled back again, after clearly sensing the awkwardness rolling in waves off Changbin, his eyes were moist.

“Would you want to join us, hyung?”

Changbin didn’t know what to answer. It should have been obvious, but actually, it wasn’t.

“Come on, guys. Don’t overwhelm him. You don’t have to decide now, Binnie, take your time; as long as you want. Our offer stands, but it’s entirely up to you. And whatever your decision will be, even if you decide not to want to crowd in with us, you can always come to us if you need something; we’ll be there for you.”

Changbin swallowed thickly, nodding slowly as he could feel his own eyes misting up, too. Still, he didn’t have an answer to the pack’s offer yet. He wasn’t sure if he would have one soon, either.

He snapped out of his thoughts when Felix sat down next to him again.

“Do you still want your egg?”

Changbin nodded, taking the boiled egg from Felix to start peeling it with slightly shaking hands, until Jeongin took it from him to give him a fully peeled one in turn.

“Uh… thanks…” Changbin looked up to be greeted by a warm smile from Jeongin and shook his head mentally to truly snap out of it.

“I… Happy belated Birthday, by the way… I kind of totally forgot last night, after… all that. Which I’m sorry for, by the way. You never got your birthday dinner…”

Jeongin shrugged, looking truly indifferent.

“Thanks! It’s ok, though, hyung. I got a belated-Birthday breakfast with everyone I care about to make up for it. That’s all that matters, right? That everyone is here.”

Changbin admired the youngest; he truly did. He, more than anyone else, made him feel welcome among the pack with his innocent ways. More even than Felix and Chan, since what he had with Felix was so different and so far beyond what a bond in a pack meant, and even though Chan had even fought another pack alpha for him and had become a good friend, Changbin still always felt like there was a stark difference in how he acted with him to how he acted with his pack members. With Jeongin, there was no difference like that.

He had to think carefully, though, before he decided if he wanted to join the pack. Minho might have been the one inviting him, on behalf of everyone, and he and Jisung might have fought next to him and for him the night before, but he still didn’t feel comfortable around them; nor did they around him, he could tell. He didn’t want to make a rash decision he would come to regret eventually.


	15. Epilogue - The Fate of The Runt

“I’m allowed to eat solid food again; it’s over for you bitches!” Jisung announced loudly as he joined the table Changbin and Felix had chosen for dinner, and who everyone but Jisung and Chan had joined so far.

“For real?!” Seungmin gave Jisung a sceptic look before trailing his questioning gaze over to Chan, who had joined them more quietly and since found an empty seat next to Woojin. He nodded to Seungmin’s question.

“The dentist gave him the all clear this time.”

“Fucking finally!” Jisung muttered, already around a mouthful of chicken, eyes rolling back dramatically as he savored the food with a moan that sounded downright lewd.

“Five weeks of only soft food was a little exaggerated, too, in my opinion… He could have at least had some things that weren’t hard to chew...” Minho remarked, watching fondly as Jisung ate like a pig, while Woojin looked like he was having the hardest time refraining from scolding him for it and cutting him some slack since it had been so long since he’d last been able to eat ‘proper food’.

“If he’d started chewing things too soon, even soft things, his mouth would have taken even longer to heal properly. It was better this way.” Chan explained, ignoring Jisung’s huffed protest.

“I’m never biting a fucking chain ever again. It’s not worth it. Broken ribs are nothing compared to having to live off soup and porridge for over a month. I can never eat either of those again without wanting to scream!”

“And _I’m_ going to scream if you keep chewing with your mouth open…! If you’re going to chew, close your damn mouth while you do it, or I’m putting you back on soup!” Woojin eventually growled, eliciting snickers around the table and rising heat into Jisung’s cheeks, who apologized quietly and ate with a little more manners after that.

“Have you heard they expelled two more members of the other pack today? I saw them leave. They had to be escorted off school grounds separately because they wouldn’t stop going at each other’s throats for five seconds…” Hyunjin eventually brought up, changing the topic around the dinner table.

“That makes how many, now? Thirteen? Ever since they demoted their pack-alpha there’s been nothing but fights for his position…” Jisung asked, incredulous enough to look up from his food.

“Seventeen. There were those two who started fighting during Woojin’s health class last week, remember?” Chan corrected him.

“Do they even have any members left at this point?” Hyunjin turned a questioning gaze at Changbin, who shrugged.

“There were thirty-something. Still a few to go.”

“If they keep going like this, they’ll have no pack left to be leaders of…”

“It’s probably for the better. A pack that can’t reach a consensus about who should lead them and where everyone keeps fighting for that spot is better off not existing as a pack in the first place.” Chan mused, and Jisung hummed in agreement as he shared a meaningful look with Felix.

“Yeah… Good thing we don’t have that kind of problem.”

“Exactly. None of us would ever dare come for Woojin’s spot!”

Chan sputtered, choking on a piece of bread as he jumped to scold the duo, who were high fiving each other with matching grins, and had to be rescued by Woojin with a few firm hits to his back while the rest of the pack dissolved in laughter and chuckles.

“There, there… Next time, maybe finish swallowing before talking, huh?”

“Yeah, hyung. Always swallow what you have in your mouth before talking.”

“Maybe don’t talk at all and just keep swallowing.”

“Truly, that’s the most pleasant way for everyone involved.”

“Amirite, Woojinnie? You prefer when Channie swallows, too, right?”

Woojin glared at Minho, who snickered while wriggling his eyebrows suggestively.

“Lee Minho, I’m warning you… There are children here…!”

“Children who also don’t need to witness Channie-hyung choking. Which is why he should swallow properly first. I’m just concerned for everyone’s well-being here!”

Woojin kept glaring at him, a slight tint creeping up to his ears and coloring them a becoming shade of red.

“You are the worst. All of you. I’m taking Woojin and forming a new pack!” Chan croaked once he’d successfully redirected the piece of bread from his lugs to his stomach.

Changbin shook his head with a fond smile, knowing Chan didn’t mean a word of it. Despite all the teasing the pack did, the leading couple loved them dearly and would never even dream of leaving them. Maybe that was why they were teased so mercilessly in the first place; probably, actually. Changbin didn’t know for sure, he only had suspicions. All the dynamics in the pack were still too new to him for him to fully grasp them. He was sure he’d get there eventually, though, he thought as he reached to pass a jar of water to Jisung. With time, he’d get there; and what he didn’t get on his own, either Felix or Chan, or even Woojin and sometimes Jeongin would always be willing to explain to him if he asked.

“Uh, Binnie…” Felix interrupted his train of thought, and Changbin looked up, just to find the whole table staring at him, in complete silence now.

“Huh… Uhm, what…?”

“Did you just pass Jisung the water?”

Changbin swallowed thickly, growing nervous under the gaze of the whole pack.

“Uh… Yes, h-he asked for it… Didn’t you, Jisung?”

Jisung nodded, as well as Felix, but it was Chan who answered.

“He did… But through _the pack bond,_ since his mouth was full…”

It took a moment for the meaning of those words to sink in for Changbin.

“What… Oh. Oh…! W-why- How-… I-… What?!”

Felix reached out through their bond, sending Changbin a powerful yet gentle wave of calm and reassurance and love, which Changbin clung to gratefully, almost desperately.

“You must have heard Ji through the pack bond…” He explained gently, aloud since their bond was too busy with their emotions for him to properly convey the words through there, too.

“B-but-… _How_?!”

Felix and Chan exchanged quick glances before Chan started cautiously.

“Pack bonds form either through the claim of the pack alpha…”

“…which Chan doesn’t do, because he’s only into biting Woojin…”

“Oh my god, Minho, will you shut up for once?!”

“…or through built-up trust and love.” The alpha finished, pointedly ignoring both Minho and his mate, holding Changbin’s gaze instead.

Changbin swallowed thickly again, his gaze nervously flitting around the table again, meeting quietly excited eyes all around until they met Jisung’s. A million thoughts seemed to pass between the two of them in the span of mere seconds, until Jeongin’s voice interrupted them.

“Oh _please_ , does that mean you’ve finally pulled that stick out of your ass when it comes to Changbin-hyung?!”

Minho made to say something, but his mouth was swiftly covered by Felix, who earned a quick but grateful look from Woojin for that.

“I-I… I didn’t do anything… But Changbin-hyung is actually kind of alright, I guess…?” Jisung stammered quietly, which was followed by an annoyed groan from Seungmin.

“Not like we’ve been telling you that for months now, Ji...! Congrats on finally waking up.”

“Anyway, welcome to the pack, Changbin. Now, a word of advice, have Felix teach you how to mute the pack bond first and foremost, if you don’t want to lose your mind before tomorrow morning!” Hyunjin laughed, and Changbin nodded as if on autopilot.

If it wasn’t for the steady stream of calm coming through the bond from Felix, he was sure he would be screaming by now.

“I… I need a moment…” He stammered quietly, pushing his chair back and stumbling to his feet. He didn’t quite manage to meet Felix’ gaze to convey his plea for help, so he resorted to shouting it through the soul-bond. Immediately, Felix let go of Minho and followed him, out of the cafeteria and into the at this time of the day deserted hallway outside.

“Binnie…?” Felix asked gently as Changbin let himself fall back against a wall, breathing heavily. “You ok?” He reached out to take Changbin’s hands in his own.

“A-am I really-… really part of the p-pack now?” He sounded breathless, and Felix stepped a little closer, both to be able to hear him better, and to hopefully ground him somewhat.

“Kind of… since you formed a bond with the pack… Without noticing it, I suppose.”

Changbin shook his head.

“I didn’t… I didn’t think it would ever be possible, either… Jisung… Minho, too… Isn’t-… Chan just said it again, this pack bond is formed through trust and love…”

Felix smiled softly.

“Looks like both Minho and Jisung have accepted you fully by now. And you, them. Otherwise, the bond wouldn’t have formed.”

Changbin took a shuddering breath, and Felix let go of his hands to pull him into his arms, holding him close. He could tell what was going through Changbin’s head even without relying on their soul-bond; he’d managed to form a bond through trust and love with eight people. Eight people, and with every single one of them the trust and love was mutual. He was trusted and loved unconditionally. For someone who was used to nothing but scorn and contempt from others, that must be really overwhelming.

“I know you’re shutting the pack bond out right now, and I know why… But… Want to try tapping into it? I promise you won’t regret it.”

Changbin shuddered, clinging to Felix without answering. But, eventually, the curiosity won out, and he opened himself to the bond cautiously.

‘Is he ok?’

‘Felix, tell us he’s ok!’

‘Should we come out?’

‘Where are you? Do you need us to avoid you?’

‘If he’s not ok I swear I’m going to cry. I didn’t mean to scare him! I’m so sorry!’

‘Ji, it’s ok. You didn’t know he’d joined the bond. None of us did. You’re not at fault.”

‘But what if we scared him away? If he wasn’t ready to join us…’

‘Guys…’

‘I shouldn’t have blurted out what it meant that he could hear Ji like that, should I? I’m such an idiot…!’

‘You’re not, Jinnie. You got excited; we all did. And someone had to tell him, eventually, anyway.’

‘Guys…!’

‘I’m actually scared right now… I don’t want to lose him, I just found him!’

‘You’re not even that close to him yet…’

‘But what if I want to be? I feel lonely being the only non-leader who’s older than everyone else!’

‘You don’t even act anywhere near your age, Binnie-hyung is decades more mature than you.’

‘Fuck you.’

‘Guys! Shut up for two seconds, will you!’

The cacophony of everyone basically yelling over each other would have been deafening if it actually happened out loud, but despite already finding that quite overwhelming, Changbin still actually jumped in Felix’ arms at Chan’s mental shout.

‘Changbin?’ The pack alpha asked into the now quiet bond, incredibly gentle, and Changbin was grateful for it.

He exhaled slowly, holding Felix tighter while burying his face against Felix’ shoulder. He couldn’t hide in the bond, not really, since the others would be able to feel his presence when he tapped into it and they paid attention - which, apparently, only Chan had. Still, he felt the need to do that at least in the physical plane, and Felix humored him, understanding as always. Taking all his courage, he projected a single word, shyly.

‘…hey.’

***

“I don’t get why we have to do this this way. Why can’t we just take a bus?” Jeongin whined, trudging after the rest of the pack towards the edge of the forest near the Academy, while half of the members were already happily bounding about in their wolf forms.

“It takes over an hour to get there by bus, and the fares are expensive. Plus, we want to show you the way through the woods, so you can find it on your own whenever you need it.” Chan explained patiently, but Jeongin still complained.

Silently, Changbin agreed with Jeongin, even if he didn’t dare complain so openly to Chan. He might have been part of the pack for a few months already now, but he still wouldn’t dream to complain when Chan said something. Usually, that is.

Changbin’s heart was beating frantically in his throat, and he really, really didn’t want to do this.

“Binnie, what’s up? Why aren’t you shifting?” Jisung bounded up to him, bumping against his legs more like a cat than a wolf.

Changbin swallowed thickly.

“I-… I think I’d rather just run along in human form…” he muttered around the lump in his throat, eliciting a discontent hum from Jisung.

“That’s silly, Bin. You’ll never be able to keep pace with the rest of us in human form.”

“I won’t be able to keep pace with you in wolf form, either…” He muttered quietly, more to himself than to anyone else.

“What was that?” Chan asked, suddenly popping up next to the two.

“N-nothing!” Changbin was quick to say, but Jisung answered at the same time.

“Binnie says he’d rather run along in human form.”

Chan frowned at the two.

“Why?”

Changbin shrugged, shrinking under Chan’s questioning gaze, until Felix leapt out of nowhere and pressed against his side, giving him the confidence to continue. Well, sort of.

“I… I’d just rather… My wolf… It’s not really…” He wrung his hands, desperate for a way to express his thoughts without actually having to say them.

Of course, Chan didn’t understand a thing of what he was stammering, and in a matter of seconds the commotion attracted the attention of the others, who joined them quickly. With each additional member surrounding them, Changbin’s discomfort grew.

“Changbinnie can’t shift?” Someone questioned, and Changbin felt embarrassment rise inside him. He wasn’t sure what was worse, not wanting or not being able to…

“Everyone, back off for a second. Binnie, a word?” Woojin was the last to join them, huffing exasperatedly, but not at Changbin. Grateful, Changbin took the chance to get out of the spotlight and hurried after Woojin without second thought as he led them out of earshot from the pack, stopping somewhere between the trees in a spot of sunlight.

“We’re not going to force you to shift, Bin. You know that, right?” Woojin eventually spoke up.

Actually, Changbin hadn’t known that. Not for sure.

“And, I think I might have an idea why you don’t want to shift… You weren’t allowed to shift growing up, were you?”

Changbin stopped to sit on the moss-covered stump of a tree, exhaling long and slowly as he nodded in confirmation.

“You know you are allowed now, though, right? That no one is going to keep you from it?”

Changbin nodded again.

“I know… I know. I’m… I’m more worried about something else, though.”

Woojin sat down next to him, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder, and Changbin leaned into the touch. He’d long since grown used to how touchy the members of the pack were with each other, and with him, too, now. He might not initiate the affectionate exchanges most of the time, but he had learned to appreciate them when someone else did a while ago.

“What is it?” Woojin prompted gently as Changbin seemed to get lost in his head. It succeeded in pulling Changbin back to the present.

“It’s… I’m not comfortable in my wolf form, hyung. I feel like I’m not meant to be a wolf.”

Woojin rubbed his back comfortingly, letting out a disagreeing hum.

“What makes you say that?”

Changbin shrugged.

“I… I feel like… It feels off, when I’m in wolf form. Everything feels off.”

Woojin took a moment to reply.

“I can see why it would… But I’m sure you’d get used to it quickly if you spent a little more time in wolf form. Haven’t you been practicing fighting in your wolf form with Felix?”

Changbin sighed.

“I have. And it’s going well. But… It’s different, when I’m with Felix. Felix can make me forget what I’m like, in wolf form; how… how lacking I am.”

Woojin’s comforting hand on his back was replaced by a full-sized side hug.

“You’re not lacking, Changbin. In any form.”

Changbin grimaced.

“I am. I’m tiny in wolf form, hyung. I’m already small like this, but I’m actually tiny as a wolf.”

“Ok…” Woojin didn’t seem to understand why that was a problem for Changbin.

“I’m even smaller than Jeongin… Only I will never grow bigger. I’m smaller, weaker, slower than any of you. It’s… embarrassing.”

Woojin sighed softly.

“Oh, Binnie... You are perfect the way you are, ok? It’s… there’s no competition going on among us, about who’s better than who in whatever. We all have our strengths and weaknesses, and that’s ok.”

Changbin didn’t look completely convinced, and Woojin sighed deeply.

“I know you went through a kind of hell that’s difficult for most of us to grasp because of your birth-pack’s beliefs, but… You’re not there anymore. None of us think like that. You’re… you’re not a runt to us, you know? You never will be.”

Changbin swallowed thickly, leaning lightly against Woojin.

“I know… I think I know, at least… I just… I can’t get over how I feel, though…”

Woojin hummed in understanding.

“How did you get over it with Felix?”

Changbin sat up a little to blink owlishly at Woojin.

“How…?”

“Well, you said that you forget about how you feel regarding your wolf form with Felix.”

Changbin averted his gaze again, feeling sheepish.

“Felix… He doesn’t make me feel as if I’m as small. He doesn’t treat me any differently. He just… sees me for me? And, since I can feel how he feels, I just know. There’s no judgement, or… or anything like that.”

Woojin hummed again, pensive, and started playing with Changbin’s hair until the younger relaxed again.

“Your soul-bond is really helping you, isn’t it…” It wasn’t a question, but Changbin still gave an affirmative answer.

“The pack-bond is quite different from the soul-bond, but if you tuned into it more, you’d be able to feel how we feel, how we think, too, you know?” Woojin mused, and again, Changbin turned sheepish.

“I’m not judging you, Binnie. I know it’s not easy for you to get used to that bond. All I’m saying is… if you tuned into the bond, you’d see how we feel about you. In your wolf form, too. I’m sure -no, I know!- that you’d find the same there that you do with Felix. We won’t treat you any differently than we always do, either.”

Changbin exhaled slowly, and he looked perfectly calm, but Woojin could feel the turmoil inside of him even though Changbin kept himself mostly secluded from the pack-bond most of the time.

“Are you really sure?” Changbin asked eventually, and it was an easy question to answer for Woojin.

“Of course, I am. I’ve known those kids for years. They love you, now; all of them.”

Changbin swallowed thickly, but a light glimmer of resolve flickered in his eyes.

“Ok…”

“Ok?”

Changbin nodded, the resolve hardening a little in his eyes.

“I’ll do it.”

Woojin’s eyebrows rose, as if he wanted to ask Changbin if he was sure, but he refrained, staying quiet as Changbin rose from his seat and dusted off any dirt that might have stuck to his pants. The resolve flickered, though, and he gave Woojin a sheepish, pleading look that melted Woojin’s heart for Changbin’s request before he’d even uttered it.

“Actually… Can you… can you not shift, until we’re with the others again, though? Would that be ok? I… I don’t want everyone to see the size difference right away.”

Woojin only nodded. There was no point trying to reassure Changbin further. He would have to see for himself that no one cared about how big or small he was to believe it and learn to be confident about himself. He only rose from his seat once Changbin had shifted, after another long moment of hesitation, and ran a hand over his head and ears in a loving gesture.

“You’re prefect, Changbinnie. Come on, let’s go.”

Changbin trotted after Woojin, the older leading the way. He was cowering even as he walked, Woojin noticed, his head and tail held low, making him look even smaller than he actually was.

As soon as they stepped out from underneath the trees, back into view of the rest of the pack, all the attention turned to them immediately. All playing around stopped, Seungmin even froze mid bite into Hyunjin’s ear to watch Woojin and Changbin approaching. As a result, Changbin cowered even further into himself.

The first one to move out of the seven was Felix, abandoning where he’d been sitting with Chan and Jeongin to come running towards Changbin and Woojin. He didn’t pay Woojin any mind, though, running right past him and shifting into his human form a few steps before reaching Changbin. Once he did, he dropped to his knees and wound his arms around Changbin’s neck and torso, hugging him tightly as he buried his face against his neck.

“I’m so proud of you…!” He whispered, low enough that only Changbin could hear him.

Changbin closed his eyes briefly, some of the tension seeping out of him now that Felix was there. Felix didn’t let go completely when he pulled back, his hands cradling Changbin’s face as he searched his gaze and found all the insecurities he could feel through their bond mirrored there.

“You are perfect, Binnie.” Felix reassured him, but Changbin was distracted by Chan, who was approaching behind Felix.

“Are you ok? Can we get going?” He addressed both Changbin and then Woojin.

Woojin exchanged a glance with Changbin before answering.

“Yes. We’re good to go.”

Chan nodded, then turned to gather the others, with Woojin in tow. Woojin only shifted when he was a good few paces away from Changbin, still honoring his request. Changbin noticed it, grateful, but froze when he noticed Felix was taking a few steps away to shift back, too.

“What?” Felix asked, stopping mid motion as he felt the change in Changbin’s emotions.

Changbin’s answer came only through their bond.

‘I’ll look tiny next to you in wolf form…’

Felix’ shoulders drooped a little.

‘Would you rather run alone? I can run with Jisung…’

Changbin hadn’t thought about that, not in that moment. Right, they were going to run. He didn’t want to run alone, not for his first run in wolf form ever. He was feeling too vulnerable to do that, scared he might fall somewhere without anyone noticing, or falling behind for any other reason.

‘No. I… I overreacted… Probably. It’s ok. I… I want to run with you.’

Felix shifted, closing the short distance between them to bump his muzzle against Changbin’s in an affectionate gesture that would have been a short peck were they in their human forms. They didn’t have long for their moment or for any more talk, as Woojin suddenly started ahead, into the forest, with Minho and Jisung shortly behind him. Hyunjin and Seungmin took Jeongin between them and followed before the other two could vanish out of sight, and Felix nudged Changbin.

‘Let’s go, that’s our spot!’

Changbin was nervous, but he fell easily into the pace Felix was going at; or maybe Felix was setting his pace to match Changbin’s. Either way, as they dove between the trees and followed the trio in front of them, Changbin found he didn’t have any room left to think. He had to focus on where to put his feet, when to jump, when to duck. He almost stumbled when he heard a footfall behind them and turned to check, just to find Chan running behind them, closing up the rear.

‘Slower, Bin. We’re almost on top of Hyunjin, Seungmin and Jeongin.’ Felix admonished after a little while.

‘I can go faster than this, though. We don’t need to go this slowly!’

‘ _You_ can. We need to go at a pace that is comfortable for all of us, though. Hyunjin, Chan and I are too heavy to go at such a fast pace for long, though.’ Felix explained with a quiet laugh through the bond, and Changbin was actually glad that he was in wolf form and his embarrassment didn’t show.

It didn’t last long, though, Changbin’s focus returning to the run per se, to the ground in front of him and flying by under his feet, as well as Felix next to him, running and leaping almost in perfect synchronization with him.

‘Tune into the pack bond, Bin.’ Felix eventually encouraged Changbin as they ran in a wide curve around the bottom of a gentle hill. Carefully, Changbin did, and it was his cautiousness that kept him from being overwhelmed by the sensations of joy and euphoria flooding the bond. It didn’t take long before he could tell the emotions from each member of the pack apart, and where exactly in front, next to or behind him they were. He could even pick out Jeongin’s joy, even though the youngest had been anything but enthusiastic about today and the planned activities before. And to Changbin’s surprise, the youngest was just as euphoric as the other members, enjoying the wild run through the woods to its fullest.

It was as if the happiness was contagious, and soon enough Changbin couldn’t tell anymore if what he was feeling was the euphoria from the other pack members, or his own. He didn’t try for long, either, just letting it wash over him while they ran.

In the end, he felt like he could have kept running like this forever, when all too soon, they reached the end of the forest, and the first houses became visible through the trees. Woojin was the first to slow down to a trot, and the others followed suit, regrouping. They were all panting, but Hyunjin was the first to drop to the ground.

“Hey, get up, you can’t lie down right after a run. Cool-down is important!” Minho scolded him, and Hyunjin whined.

“I’m exhausted, you set a mad pace right from the start! You know I can’t go that fast!” He heaved himself back to his feet, though, following the rest of the pack.

“It wasn’t even that mad a pace, you managed to keep it, didn’t you?” Seungmin commented, laughing, even though he was breathless, too.

“Barely! Hyung, why didn’t you make us slow down?” Hyunjin turned to Chan, and to Changbin’s surprise, Chan was panting just as hard, looking like he would rather follow Hyunjin’s example and lie down on the forest ground for a nap, too.

“I would have… If we’d have had to go any further. Damn, Bin, how are you already breathing normally again?!” The alpha panted and exclaimed as he fell into step with Felix and Changbin.

Changbin startled a little, wondering pretty much the opposite; how could it be the other two, and Felix, too, were still so winded? It hadn’t been that long or hard a run!

“Perks of not being an elephant! Am I right, hyung?” Jeongin chimed in before Changbin could answer, falling into step with Changbin, too. The youngest laughed, bumping against Changbin’s side and nosing at his cheek in what Changbin recognized as an invitation to play.

“Hey, brat! Who’s an elephant! Watch your tone!” Chan scolded without any bite, and Jeongin laughed again.

“Or what, hyung?”

“I’ll ground you!”

“You’d have to catch me first! And I’m not seeing that happen any time soon!”

Chan was too busy trying to catch his breath to continue arguing with Jeongin.

“Changbin! Catch that brat and ground him for me, please!”

Changbin’s eyes widened.

“Me? Why?”

“You’re the only one who won’t risk a heart attack if you take another running step out of us.” Felix explained, and Chan nodded in agreement.

“That’s what you get for being literal tanks! Come, Changbin, let’s leave the bulldozers to cool down! Woojin hyung said there is a meadow between the houses and the forest, I bet it’s beautiful!”

Changbin was a little perplex by that sudden invite, but he decided to follow Jeongin after an encouraging nudge from Felix through their bond.

There was indeed a meadow, where Jisung and Minho were already running around, chasing each other. Jeongin took off as soon as he noticed their play, chasing after Jisung, until that one turned around and Jeongin became the chased one. That didn’t last long, either, and Jeongin chased Minho instead. Changbin stood simply watching the others play, but forgot about Jisung for a moment too long. Suddenly, the other was on top of him, throwing him to the ground and rolling with him through the grass.

Changbin was back on his feet in no time, his reflexes kicking in faster than his brain, but Jisung didn’t seem to be in a hurry to get up. He rolled onto his back in front of Changbin instead and playfully nipped at his feet.

“Play with us, Binnie hyung!” He begged, letting go of Changbin when the latter pulled his feet out of his reach. Jisung jumped to his own feet. “Come on, please!” He was so busy trying to get Changbin to join their play that he missed Jeongin literally flying towards them until he barreled into Jisung, sending him toppling just like Jisung had done with Changbin moments before. In that moment, Changbin remembered Minho was there, too, and looked up just in time to see him coming at him. At the very last second, he jumped out of the way, and Minho stumbled, fell, and knocked Jisung, who’d only just gotten up again, back to the ground.

Without meaning to, Changbin found himself in the middle of the play fight, but it was really just that: a play fight. None of the bites from the others hurt, no claws, teeth, kicks or punches were thrown with the intention to hurt in the slightest as they rolled over the meadow and played in the tall grass.

“Boys! Get over here!” Chan eventually shouted, his voice holding hints of his commanding tone, and the four picked themselves and each other up to join the rest of the group, who were already in their human forms again.

“Oh dear… Look at you guys! You look like… Like….”

“Like pups who’ve been rolling around in grass and dirt? Yeah.” Chan laughed, completing Woojin’s sentence. Woojin sighed, fondly exasperated.

“Come on, we gotta shift back for the last hundred meters, no need to send our future neighbors into a panic just yet.”

To his own surprise, Changbin felt almost reluctant as he shifted back, and so did Jeongin.

“You look like you made out with a ball of hay, actually…” Felix remarked with a laugh as he stepped in front of Changbin, plucking a few stray blades of grass and wildflower leaves out of his hair and smoothing it down before leaning in and sealing Changbin’s lips, slightly parted to catch his breath again, with a kiss.

“Had fun?” He asked with a content smile as he pulled away, and Changbin couldn’t lie.

“Yeah…”

Felix’ smile grew.

“I’m glad. Feeling a little better about your wolf?”

To be honest, Changbin hadn’t thought much about his form after the first few hundred meters of the run, and not at all in the meadow. He shrugged in answer, but Felix could hear the true answer echo through the bond, and it was unmistakable how pleased he was about that.

“Let’s go. We have water and snacks already at the apartment… Actually, remind me later that we should make a secret water stash somewhere out here for when you come over, so you can refresh immediately and don’t have to wait until you get to ours…” Chan interrupted Changbin’s thoughts, calling everyone to move again. Once again, Woojin took the lead and Chan the rear as they led the rest of the pack to the apartment the two would be moving into in about two weeks, after graduating.

It was a small apartment, and not the best, but it was affordable. They’d be able to pay the rent and have enough left to live off from what Chan would be able to earn, while Woojin was enrolling in the local university on a scholarship.

The tour of the small apartment ended quickly, and the nine of them focused on the snacks and water instead. While they ate and refreshed, no one talked, but as the last of the snacks disappeared, conversation picked up again.

“Hyung, can I come to sleep over here with you every day? This is so much cooler than the dorms.” Jeongin asked at some point, and all other conversation died again.

“Ah… I don’t think that would be right, Innie… You’ll be more comfortable at the dorms…” Chan objected carefully, but he still received an all-mighty pout from Jeongin in turn.

“It won’t be the same at the dorms without you, though…!”

“We’ll be there with you through the bond all the time, Innie. Of course, you can come to sleep over every once in a while, but not all the time.” Woojin reassured him, and with him, Jeongin didn’t keep complaining.

“We’ll all be living together again, soon. Until then, we’ll have to make do like this. You’ll be fine, though. We will all be fine.” Woojin continued, then changed the subject subtly. Changbin only noticed just how much the subject changed when he felt a light tap on his shoulder. It was Chan.

“Can we talk, for a second?”

His heart sunk a little; Changbin had expected Chan to want to talk to him, too, soon, after his refusal to shift at first, but maybe not so soon? Or maybe it had to be this soon, since they were short on time. Either way, Changbin got up and slipped out of the living room into one of the two bedrooms. Chan closed the door quietly.

“I’m not going to talk around the subject much, Changbin; I need to ask you a favour.”

Changbin’s eyes widened in surprise, but Chan continued.

“I know the kids are all upset about Woojin and me moving out, but no one is more upset about that than the two of us, probably. We… we’re worried about the kids. About all of you, but especially Jeongin and Seungmin. And, well, Felix, but he’s got you now…”

Changbin nodded slowly, taking in Chan’s words, but of course he was still hung up on the favour part.

“You… I trust you, Changbin. A lot. And… I want you to take over for me in leading the pack while I’m not there.”

Changbin blinked at Chan owlishly, not at all grasping the words or implications.

“You can always, always reach out to either Woojin or me if you need to. And we will do our best to keep everyone in line and happy at the same time from afar, but the pack needs someone at the Academy with them that they see every single day, someone who they trust and love and can confide in at any time. And Woojin and I need someone we know and trust to make sure the others don’t take themselves and each other, and possibly outsiders, apart.”

Changbin was nothing short of overwhelmed by Chan’s request. He stumbled backwards, then stopped and sat down right there on the floor, arms crossed in front of his stomach and holding on tightly onto each other, like a shield.

“O-ok… W-why me, though?”

Chan sat down with him.

“You taught all of us a variety of very valuable lessons for life. We became better through you alone, and you remind us to improve ourselves, always. You… you are wise beyond your years, and kind and understanding even when every one of the rest of us would lose their patience, yet you won’t tolerate bullshit.”

Changbin blushed slightly at the compliments, but he felt it was not the time.

“What about Minho?”

Chan shook his head.

“Minho is smart, but he’s also a fool for Jisung, and Jisung alone. He lacks the ability to see a bigger picture and beyond what he gets at face value. Also, he’s possibly the last person the younger members would seek out to share their worries with and ask for help; except for Jisung, of course. Whereas you manage to get even Seungmin to come to you with his worries; and that’s by no means a small feat!”

“And Felix? I thought… I though he was closest to you?”

Chan hummed.

“He is. Which also means I know exactly what his strengths and weaknesses are. And while he’s very passionate, caring and protective… He’s also impulsive and hot-headed. He’s not fit to lead. Not yet. He still has a lot to learn.”

Changbin exhaled slowly.

“Won’t they be disappointed when you chose me over them to…” He struggled to find the words, since the concept was still mind-boggling to him.

“As acting leader in my absence?”

Changbin nodded hesitantly.

“They’ll get over it quickly. While both of them are secretly hoping, they are also terrified of the responsibility, because they know their weaknesses all too well.”

“I know my weaknesses, too, and I am not at all ready for this, Chan!” Changbin interjected, finding the courage to actively contradict his leader for the first time, but Chan shook his head softly at him.

“You mistake your strengths for weaknesses, Changbin, that’s different. You might think you are not ready, but in a way, that is exactly what makes you better for this position than anyone else.”

Light panic was rising in Changbin.

“Chan, I… I can’t, though. I-… I’m not a leader, I’m a _runt_ , for crying out loud! I can barely defend myself, never mind the pack, I can’t even raise my voice to get someone to shut up, I’ll never get anyone to hear me out; I don’t inspire respect in anyone! You’re making a mistake…!”

Chan shook his head though, reaching out to take Changbin’s hands in his own and keeping them from bruising Changbin’s own arms.

“Changbin, do you think I lead alone? Or solely by inspiring respect in everyone?”

“Well, everyone respects you!”

Chan chuckled softly.

“They respect my decisions, if I can explain why I took them, and if they make sense. If I fail and don’t manage to get my point across, they do what they want. That’s what usually happens when I don’t listen to Woojin. But since Woojin agrees that you are the best fit to lead the pack in our absence, I am sure everyone will accept the decision to appoint you as acting leader for the next two years; and they will accept your decisions, you’ll be able to convince them easily since you are smarter than all of them put together. Well, Seungmin being the exception, but he’ll listen to you anyway.”

Changbin remained unconvinced.

“That’s one thing… what about others, outside the pack, though? I can’t defend the pack…”

“You got Felix for that while at the Academy. You should be safe there on your own from now on anyway. The other pack won’t grow to become a hassle for us again: the board decided not to take in wolves anymore, save those that are already enrolled.”

That was news to Changbin. And he was running out of arguments. Chan sensed that, too, squeezing his hands in his own warmly.

“Changbin, you are perfect for this. Sleep over it, think about it. Talk to Felix. And you can ask me or Woojin everything you might want to know, anytime.”

***

Felix hugged him tightly, squeezing his air out of his lungs with his hold on him, after he told him about Chan’s decision.

“I’m so, so proud of you, Bin.”

Changbin fisted his hands in the back of Felix’ shirt.

“You’re not mad at me?”

Felix froze, pulling back only just enough to look at Changbin’s face.

“Why would I be mad?”

“That Chan chose me, and not you?”

“Are you crazy? Of course, I’m not! Chan wouldn’t make such a decision lightly; if he chose you, it’s because you are the best fit!”

Changbin gaped at him for a moment, then snapped his mouth shut again. He hadn’t expected this to be Felix’ reaction, at all. And, if he was honest, those few words from Felix convinced him more of his aptitude than everything Chan had said to him earlier.

“You think so?”

“I’m sure of it! It makes a lot of sense, actually. What did you tell him?”

“What?”

“Did you accept?”

“I didn’t want to… He told me to think about it, though…”

Felix hummed, hugging him tightly again.

“You should accept. You’ll make a great acting leader.”

Felix’ words stayed at the forefront of his mind long after, shining brightly among the sea of what if’s that kept him from falling asleep that night. But the longer he thought about it, the more Felix’ words, and Chan’s reasoning, too, drowned out those what ifs. They believed in him. If they did, the other members might, too. All he had to do was believe in himself now… Maybe… maybe he’d give it a try.

No, not maybe.

He would tell Chan he accepted. He’d probably pester him constantly, but Chan did say he could ask him and Woojin everything, anytime. He had to have known beforehand that he would do that. He probably expected nothing else.

It would be ok…

Changbin exhaled slowly, finally closing his eyes and snuggling up against Felix, who’d fallen asleep hours ago. A small smile played around his lips as he drifted off to sleep.

Who would have thought; him, a runt, the acting leader of a pack?


End file.
